Good… because I’m losing my shit,and she shouldbe careful.
“You don’t want more?”
To make my point, I spit out each word as its own sentence. “Liz. I. Don’t. Do. Relationships.”
“You might not have in the past, but what’s wrong with being with Finn now?”
Gah, she has the gall to be rational.
“Well, for starters… he’s not only one of Jax’s best friends, but he’s in Ruby Frax and will forever be connected to our family. What happens when things go wrong?”
“But what if they go right?” she quickly counters, clearly channeling Nana as that was one of her favorite sayings.
“I could fuck up everything for our entire family if things go sideways. That’s just too much risk.”
“Look, it’s getting late, and I need to get ready for work. So please think about this… you don’t have to decide anything right now. Take that pressure off yourself. It’s not helping, and you’ll know the answer to my next question when you’re ready.”
“Okay… this has gotta be good,” I mutter to myself.
But she ignores my jab. “I do want you to seriously think about this. One day, Finn will move on. He’ll find someone who loves him like he deserves. You said it yourself. He’ll forever be connected to our family. My question for you is… how are you gonna feel if it isn’t you?”
My eyes keep drifting to Raven throughout the entire ceremony. She’s taken my breath away since making her appearance today for pictures. She’s wearing a cornflower-blue dress, or so she called, that accentuates her every curve and falls just below her knees. It’s like her sisters, as they’re all the same shade, but each bridesmaid has it styled uniquely. Raven tried to explain that these dresses were versatile, as they could be styled in over one hundred different ways, but I’ll have to take her word for it. I could truly care less. All that matters to me is how radiant she is as she peeks at me while Jax and Sloane say their vows.
While words are spoken about loving one another completely, her eyes shimmer with unshed tears, and her smile grows. When her eyes meet mine, her cheeks turn the most beautiful shade of pink, then she blinks rapidly and looks away. Sometimes her expression turns serious, and I’d give just about anything to know what’s going on in that brilliant brain of hers.
Has she given what I said any more thought? Is she considering more with me? Or have I lost my chance by keeping her at bay?
My heart aches at just the thought. Instinctually, I know I’m doing the right thing, but it’s harder than I imagined waiting for a response. I’ve been on pins and needles since laying my feelings out there. Patience is a virtue that’s running thin and if she doesn’t make up her mind soon, I may have to switch up my antics.
Suddenly, the crowd erupts in cheers, and I frantically look around to see what’s happening. Jax and Sloane are just pulling back from their kiss, and the music starts as they walk down the makeshift aisle in the sand.
How did I miss the entire ceremony?
Looking to Raven, I hold out an elbow for her to use as I escort her down the aisle behind the bride and groom. Feeling her squeeze my arm in excitement has me picking up my pace, eager to spend more time with her. The way her fingers graze my skin makes my body hum in anticipation.
Sloane and Jax opted to forgo a formal reception. Instead, they have hired a caterer and plan to have a barbeque at their family’s home after the ceremony. They assured Mable, when she asked, that they would still uphold all the traditions but on a smaller scale. I, for one, can’t wait to get Raven on the dance floor, so I have a reason to keep her in my arms. If I had my way, I wouldn’t let her go all night.
Once we’ve walked down the aisle, I’m forced to release Raven as she rushes to Sloane and hugs her fiercely. “I’m so happy for you, Sloaney.” Then she hugs Jax just as tight. “I love you, too, Jax. Let me be the first to officially welcome you to the family.”
Before either can say more, the bride and groom are rushed with an onslaught of people, all giving their best wishes. As I awkwardly stand and watch, Raven steps up beside me and reaches for my hand. Her other hand snakes around my arm, and she squeezes me tight. “God, I’m so happy for them.”
“So am I,” I agree. “This moment is magical.”
While we wait for the after party, or so they’re calling it, Raven and I mingle with the rest of the wedding party and her family. Before we know it, the bride and groom have returned and food is served as music plays quietly in the background. They’ve hired a deejay to mix music and play the part of emcee, as Jax was insistent Ruby Frax should enjoy the night with their family and loved ones, not perform for everyone.
From one event to the next, my focus remains on Raven. I barely remember the words to the speech I’ve given once she steps up to give hers.
Taking the mic firmly in her hands, Raven slays it with her speech. “Jax, I’ve had the honor of living with Sloane since being roommates in the womb. She’s more than my sister; she’s my best friend. When she met you, I knew you were the one for her. Heck, I knew it before either of you could pull your heads out of your asses and realize it for yourselves. I know your love is special and pure. I’m expecting you both to love, honor, and cherish each other until forever. I wish you the best and will love you both until the end of time. Congratulations! Please lift your glasses to the bride and groom!”
After our speeches, Sloane and her father dance, and then they ask the wedding party to join them on the deck. Wrapping Raven in my arms, we glide across the floor. When I’m here with her like this, I’ve never felt so right.
We continue dancing for a few more songs, until Raven sighs heavily and asks, “Would you mind taking a walk with me? I could really use a break.”
Without another word, we slip out of the crowd and quickly make our way to the promenade. Raven’s quiet as we walk and the sounds of the party behind us slowly disappear. Once the sound of the ocean is all we hear, Raven pulls us to a bench where we can sit and watch the waves crash onto shore.
“Everything okay?” I ask when I can’t take the silence any longer. Obviously, she’s got something on her mind, and she might as well tell me so we can handle this burden together.
“Yes and no.” She shrugs.
