We kept it secret for two months. Not easy, when both my office and bedroom were right next to his boss’s. We met in random tiny restaurants on the other side of the city, went for long walks in the Peak District and spent a few weekends doing the kind of activities I’d never even considered before. We caught the Eurostar to Paris, a mini-cruise across to Rotterdam. We tried indoor skydiving, Leo talked our way into a celebrity party and we got up hideously early to drive to the coast and take a sunrise swim in the freezing North Sea. Everything felt wild and exhilarating. I felt a tiny bit wild. Our relationship was similar to a never-ending game of truth or dare.
We couldn’t go to my apartment, so we were always at Leo’s, which, along with my long-time habit of going with the flow, meant he set the tone and pace of our time together. Leo constantly encouraged me to give it a go, be brave, embrace the moment. I couldn’t, however, quite find the courage to admit how it sometimes all left me longing for a chance to catch my breath.
Things rapidly intensified throughout the autumn. Leo constantly told me how much he loved me, how he’d never felt this way before, I was amazing, dazzling, beautiful. We were made to be together. After a lifetime of being slightly on the edge, feeling like the centre of someone’s world was irresistible.
He did, however, seem to get a kick from growing increasingly reckless at work. He made comments in front of colleagues that were too personal, and the couple of times we were at the same meeting, he reached for my hand beneath the table and leaned in far too close. When I tried to half-heartedly confront him about it, he downplayed my concerns with jokes, and reassured me it was his job on the line, not mine, so I shouldn’t worry about it.
Until, one afternoon in mid-November, Shay walked into my office the exact moment he pulled me into his lap.
‘Right.’ She pursed her lips. ‘I’d thought as much.’
Then she walked straight out again. The door slammed so forcefully, Kieran came out of his office to ask if everything was okay.
‘Ask her,’ I heard Shay bark from the other side of my door. ‘If she won’t spill, then try your brother.’
We had a long, drawn-out, embarrassingly candid meeting that night, back at the apartment.
I told them everything, including that it wasn’t an office fling. Leo and I were deeply in love.
‘Darling, you don’t know what love is,’ Shay bit back, her hackles rising.
‘No,’ I retorted, which was uncharacteristic enough to get them listening properly. ‘You don’t. Either of you. Neither of your failed attempts at relationships have even come close, so you’ve no right to preach at me.’
Now wasn’t the time to add that if they had the first clue about love, they’d be married by now.
‘You think skulking about the office having clandestine smooches in the stationery cupboard is any better?’ She tossed her hair in disgust. ‘That’s not love, it’s lust combined with the thrill of doing something forbidden. At least I’m under no illusions about the men I date.’
‘If it was anyone else—’ Kieran hadn’t been able to look at me since he’d arrived ‘—we could figure something out.’
‘No, we couldn’t,’ Shay snapped. ‘No dating someone of a higher or lower position. It’s plain and simple and we aren’t making an exception for a director. Or a relative.’
‘What about Lucy and Steven?’ I threw back.
‘That’s not the same.’ Kieran shook his head vigorously. ‘They’re married.’
‘So, if you’re married, it’s fine?’
‘You’re the damn HR expert here. You know the protocols,’ Kieran said. ‘But you’ve known each other, what, two months? Marriage is hardly relevant to this situation.’
‘Even if we didn’t employ him,’ Shay sneered. I was used to seeing her livid, shouting and swearing, throwing things – although never at me. This bitter contempt was withering. ‘Why Leo, Mary? Knowing what Kieran went through? It’s so wrong.’
‘I don’t know what Kieran went through!’ I exclaimed, in full defensive mode. I’d finally found a good man, who was crazy enough about me to risk his dream job, and they couldn’t even try to be happy for me. ‘I wasn’t part of the inner duo, so I didn’t get to know that information.’
‘You know he couldn’t talk about it!’ Shay finally lost her temper. ‘You saw how he was whenever he came back from London. Are you so stupid, you couldn’t figure out for yourself how this would hurt him? Or so spoiled and selfish, you don’t care?’
‘What?’ All my bravado disintegrated, exposing the guilt-ridden mess cowering behind it.
‘It’s basic enough! You don’t date your best friend’s brother. Let alone this barely a brother. Who also happens to work for us. Honestly, Mary, could you have picked someone worse? If I didn’t know you better, I’d think you were trying to cause trouble.’
‘So, what now?’ Kieran sounded numb. ‘How do we fix this without it becoming a legal nightmare?’
Shay whipped her head around to look at him. ‘Do you think that’s why he did it? So he can sue us down the line? Screw you over?’
If you’d asked me up until this meeting, I’d have sworn that Leo and I were two people in love who happened to have the misfortune of working for the same company. Leo not making a big deal out of it had meant I’d really not taken Kieran being his brother seriously enough.
Were they right, though? Was this all a scam to hurt Kieran? Was I the monumental fool who’d been so easily reeled in?
Even if it wasn’t, I had no idea what to do about it.
