“She was,” I responded solemnly. “It hasn’t been the same since she’s been gone. Pops sure hasn’t been the same. Truthfully,noneof us will ever be the same. She had an impact on each one of us individually, as well as being the rock behind our family.”
Stella traced her fingers up and down my arm, which was wrapped tightly around her slight frame. I felt the path each one of her digits took long after she’d moved them from the spot. Her touch was like fire branding its way into my skin.
“If you don’t mind me asking, how did she pass?” she asked hesitantly.
“A brain aneurysm,” I said matter-of-factly. “Here one day, and gone the next. They told us at the hospital that there was nothing we could have done to prevent it. They just… happen.”
Stella shifted in my arms to turn and look at me. She was so goddamn beautiful, even with the solemn look that currently blanketed her expression.
I brushed one of her curls behind her shoulder, tenderly trailing my fingers over her slender neck on the retreat. She leaned into my touch and I settled my hand on her hip.
“I’m so sorry, Max,” she whispered.
“Thank you,” I replied in earnest. I could tell that her apologies weren’t the empty platitudes we’d come to expect around Ma’s death. People don’t know what to say when someone passes suddenly. Their default reaction is an apology and an empty offer to help if we needed it.
“When Wade and I were little, she’d bring us here to the cove every first of May. The fireflies appear when the weather warms up. It became a tradition for us to camp out here and wait for the fireflies to make their appearance, signaling the start of spring.”
I looked around at the serenity of the cove and continued, feeling a gentle breeze sway through the trees. I felt as if that breeze was Ma giving me her silent approval. “She always told us that fireflies were magic- that they carried your wishes off into the night to be granted by the moon.”
“She would tell us to sit right here on the bank, catch a firefly in our hands, make a wish, and let it go.” I cupped Stella’s hands in mine and watched as a firefly landed in the middle of her palm. I carefully closed my hands over hers, her soft skin a contrast to my own, and looked up to meet her gaze.
“I’ve made my wish. Now it’s your turn. Make a wish, Stella.”
SEVENTEEN
stella
I peekedat the tiny orange and black bug crawling around between my palms. Its bioluminescent lower half flickered green in random intervals.
Closing my eyes, I thought of what to wish for. I could wish that Charlie and I wouldn’t have to look over our shoulders for the rest of our lives. I could wish for an abundance of happiness. After a long period of contemplation, my countless desires eventually narrowed down to one particular wish: a single, burning hope.
Opening my eyes and my hands, I released the firefly. I watched it buzz away into the night, mixing with the stars in the sky, with a gentle smile spread across my face.
The idea that a tiny little bug that could fly all the way to the moon and grant wishes was silly, but it was the perfect type of silly for tonight. I needed the lightness of this moment in a life full of moments designed to test me at every turn.
“Do I get to know what you wished for?” Max asked, breaking me from my gaze on the bright twinkling stars above.
My smile turned timid as I looked down and picked at a hole in my jeans. I tugged on the barely fraying strings until they began unraveling into a bigger rip. The symbolism of pulling at those strings to what lay beneath wasn’t lost on me. Max had been peeling back the threads of my carefully crafted armor designed to protect my heart. He had created a hole that only he could fill.
“If I tell you, does it not come true?” I challenged.
“I’m not sure if wishing on fireflies is the same as wishing on birthday candles, but I can tell you I’ll go crazy if I don’t know what you wished for.”
I thought about suggesting a different wish because I was a little embarrassed by how simple and silly mine was. Instead, I opted for the truth.
“I wished for you to kiss me,” I whispered and brought my eyes up to meet his gaze.
His eyes blazed with desire; his grip on my neck, tender yet firm, sent shivers down my spine. There was zero hesitancy in his movements. I was sure he could feel my pulse racing, but I hoped that his was beating just as fast.
Max leaned down and swiftly pressed his lips against mine. His mouth was soft in its caress, as if he was holding back. I shifted to my knees, scooting forward until our bodies were flush, our lips still locked.
Placing one knee on either side of his outstretched legs, I straddled his lap, seating myself gently down on his thighs. I hadn’t ever been this brazen, but something about how Max cherished me made me feral with need.
Max groaned into my mouth and tilted my head back to open me up to him more, licking at the seam of my lips for entrance. I moaned softly, and he used the opening to coast his tongue gently against my own. As I ran my hands up his chestand around to the nape of his neck, I scratched my nails through his short prickly strands of hair and shivered at the electric need coursing through my body.
Max kissed with the fire of a man who was desperate to consume me. I kissed back with the wanton need of someone desperate for affection. I felt his rigid length thickening between my legs, and I shifted my hips in exploration. He broke the kiss with a heated groan and trailed tender nips down the smooth column of my throat.
“Fuck, Stella.” he remarked, trailing his way back up to take my mouth in another sensual kiss.
