"I heard Letty in the scullery crying about how her special friend from the butcher's who kept giving her spare sausagesand ham doesn't want to see her anymore. She told Ellis that he abandoned her because he doesn't like her anymore."
Cedric nodded slowly. "Okay. But what does a scullery maid's, ah, gentleman have to do with your mother and father?"
"Well, if Letty's friend abandoned her because he doesn't like her anymore, and that's why he doesn't come to see her anymore, does Aunt Lady not like us anymore and that's why she abandoned us? And if she abandoned us, is the reason we don't live with Mama and Papa anymore because they don't like us either? Are webad, Uncle Cedric?" Kenneth's voice pitched dangerously high as he rushed to complete the thoughts that had been plaguing him ever since Louisa had left.
Cedric dropped down onto Kenneth's bed and gathered the small boy tightly into his arms. "Kenneth, that is not true. Your mama and papa loved you dearly. They never would have abandoned you. And Louisa loves you too, I promise she does. She loves you both so much and she has not abandoned us, and she will come back to us. She will."
Abigail crawled out of her bed and joined the embrace. Cedric sat holding the children until their bodies slumped limply against him and their breathing evened out. His mind whirled. He had no idea Kenneth was putting pieces together in this way, but a more pressing thought niggled at him. He had promised the children that Louisa would return when he had no right to make such a promise. Would he turn out to be a liar when she refused to come back to his house? He was certain she cared greatly for the children, but would that care really override heropinions of him? If she had fled him, could he really be sure she would return?
Cedric moved Abigail back to her own bed and turned to leave, suddenly exhausted. His heart leapt and he clapped a hand to his mouth to prevent himself from exclaiming as he caught sight of a shadowy figure standing in the doorway, watching him.
Louisa.
Louisa felt wearier than she could ever remember feeling before. The whole journey back to St Vincent had been fraught as she battled with her own emotions. She had thought it bad enough when all she had to worry about was the way Cedric toyed with her heart and emotions. First, with his icy demeanor and insistence on their marriage being for convenience only, then with his supposed thawing and desire for friendship, then bykissing herand cruelly dashing her away again. Louisa felt dread as the coach came to a halt outside the house and Collins rushed to open the door for her. She simply did not know what to do.
Entering the quiet house, she had meant to go straight to bed, unsure if she could possibly face seeing one more person. But as she reached the landing she glanced towards the children's room and saw the open door. She frowned.Surely the little ones are in bed by now?
She reached the door to find Cedric holding them tightly, murmuring into Kenneth's hair. Louisa's heart ached. Howcould this man be so, so complicated? She watched quietly from the shadows as the children slid back into sleep and Cedric tucked them both into bed, smoothing down the sheets. He turned and saw her in the doorway, and in the gloom she could see the surprise in his eyes as he forced himself not to exclaim out loud. A small part of herself felt rather pleased at having elicited such a reaction.
Louisa turned and walked from the room, hearing Cedric's footsteps as he hurried to join her, closing the door softly behind him.
"Louisa," he breathed, and she had to swallow hard before she permitted herself to turn and look him in the eye.
"Lord St Vincent."
Something flashed across his face, confusion chasing what she thought for a split second was hurt. "I'm so glad you've returned to us. That is to say, the children have missed you."
"Yes. Well. I have missed them too. I shall be glad to see them at breakfast."
"I trust your family is well?"
"Fine, thank you, my lord."
Louisa watched with some grim satisfaction as Cedric struggled to think of what to say. For so long he had been the cold anddistant one, and it seemed to Louisa that he had no idea how to react when he was faced with that same behavior against him.
"And it was a good journey back? Smooth, I mean?"
"It was fine." Cedric went to speak again but Louisa broke in, suddenly keenly aware of how exhausted she was. "If you'll excuse me, my lord, it was a most tiring day. I shall retreat to my chambers now."
"I- well yes, of course. Goodnight, Louisa." Cedric's confusion was evident but still he stepped aside to let her pass.
As she crossed his path however, he reached out to gently touch her elbow. "I truly am glad you have returned."
Louisa sniffed. "I did not have much choice, did I? I have not forgotten about the ball you informed me we shall be attending."
Cedric blinked. "I could look at it again if you wish, see if we truly have to make an appearance."
"Of course we do. We're newlyweds. Imagine the scandal if we didn't. Don't worry, I won't make a fuss. Goodnight, my lord."
Louisa slipped away from his outstretched hand and towards her bedroom. She couldn't help but notice that through their entire interaction Cedric had been unable to tear his eyes away from her. Shut safely behind her bedroom door, she breathed deeply.
She truly did not know whatever she was going to do.
CHAPTER TWENTY
"My dear, have you seen her yet? Positively charming of course with all that money she has now."
"Then you think that it was for the money? I have heard of course that she needed to escape several scandals and a wedding was the best way to cover a multitude of sins."
