Leah nodded, resuming the pouring of medicinal tea into her cup. It smelled bitter and strange, like rosehips and blackcurrant mixed together. Being bright red, he wondered if he was not far off the right ingredients. But it was her stiff posture and strained smiles that held his attention, making him uneasy.
“Leah, might I be frank for a moment?”
She sat back, bringing her cup to her lips. “Of course. Always. I encourage it.”
“Have I upset you? Perhaps I am imagining it, but you do not seem as friendly today,” he said, agitated. “Is it the headache, maybe?”
Leah paused, pointedly setting her cup back down. “It is not the headache, but my mindisvery full.” She drew in a breath. “I have had a great deal to consider, and I think our discussion yesterday brought something to the forefront of my thoughts. In truth, it is something I have been contemplating for a while, ever since one of my dear friends mentioned it, but I had smothered it until yesterday.”
“Oh?” Nathaniel’s knee began to jig as nerves trickled into his veins. Something had happened to Leah, and whatever it was, she was not quite the same person he had left at these apartments the previous day.
“You said something poignant to me,” she continued. “You said, “Is that not why we began this, to show Jonathan what everyone else already knows—that jilting you was the greatest mistake of his life?” In the chaos of our ruse, I had forgotten that, and your words—and Jonathan’s face—were a necessary reminder. Indeed, I realized last night that my objective for this deception has already been accomplished.”
Nathaniel’s knee stopped dead. “What do you mean?”
“I wanted him to understand that he was no longer any concern of mine,” she explained. “I wanted to wipe the smug smirk off his face, and after yesterday, that has been accomplished. You said it yourself, he will not say another unkind word to me. I am free of him, Nathaniel, and it is all thanks to you.”
Nathaniel swallowed. “Yes, but what are you saying?”
“I am saying that my half of the reward has been delivered,” she said with an unsettling calm in her voice.
“Are you saying you want the ruse to end already?” He felt the shock in his throat, tightening his words.
She shook her head. “I am saying that my side is complete. Of course, I shall continue the ruse as agreed in our contract until your objective has also been accomplished. You have helped me so much; I must do the same for you. After that, our agreement will end.”
“Just like that?”
She shrugged, taking up her cup of tea again. “Whyever not? That is what we decided upon. That was always the plan, was it not?”
“Well, yes, but—”
“Then we must abide by the terms of the contract.” She sipped her tea, but Nathaniel noticed the slightest tremor in her hand, her gaze flitting away from his. “You see, what you did for me was more than I ever could have imagined, and you did it so expertly that I have what I wanted from this already. I am as surprised as you, but that is the truth.”
Nathaniel sat back, his heart a stone in his chest. “This is because I hit Jonathan, is it not? You think me a brute.”
“I could never think that,” she replied softly. “You defended and fought for my honor against the man who broke my heart. I would not judge you for the way you did it, not even a little bit.”
A breath caught in Nathaniel’s throat. “Broke your heart? I thought it was just your reputation that he wounded.”
“I suppose I told a small lie,” she conceded, turning her gaze toward the windows and the bruised rainclouds beyond. “I… did love him. I loved him the moment I set eyes upon him, for I was young and foolish. I do not think any woman can know the true nature of a man until it is revealed to them, for so many hide behind charm and chivalry.”
Nathaniel felt sick, her words dragging him back through the years to his childhood, hearing his mother say the same thing as she sat in the kitchens with him, holding a piece of raw meat to her cheek.
“I did not know that he valued his pride above all else and that his affections for me were fickle,” Leah continued. “Two nights before my wedding, my mother and father held a party at Druidstone Abbey, to celebrate the upcoming nuptials. I drank too much of my father’s brandy to steady my nerves, and I clambered up onto the table in the banqueting hall in front of everyone and made a speech about Jonathan. I recited a sonnet, too. I humiliated myself, but I humiliated him too. News reached him, and I suppose he decided he did not want an embarrassment for a wife.”
Nathaniel stared at her, his voice brittle as he said, “You do not seriously believe that you were to blame. I know you do not.”
“Oh, I am not saying that,” she replied, still refusing to look at him. “If he had loved me, truly loved me, he would have laughed and married me anyway. But I am guilty of trusting him, of loving him, of thinking we could be happy. You have freed me of that guilt.”
“You… really loved him?” Nathaniel choked on the sentence, the past and the present blurring together. He did not know why the thought of her loving Jonathan stung so much, but like accidentally brushing a nettle, it stung regardless.
Leah sighed. “I really did, albeit briefly. Being jilted will rid a girl of her love for anyone. Still, being jilted is better than being the wife of a wretch like him.” She shook her head. “I pity Dorothy, I truly do.”
“I see.” Nathaniel clawed his way back to a place of calm, using the ordinary tea as his medicine. Only when his breathing had slowed and his heart had settled did he continue, “So, allow me to confirm, this ruse will end when my reason for beginning it has been resolved?”
Leah finally looked his way, nodding. “In a nutshell, yes.”
“And you are certain your objective has been achieved?”
