“Then you haven’t been listening. Ian has a savior complex.” Luke’s still eating popcorn, damn him. “So, I tricked him in to coming home so we could help him pull his head out of his ass.”
“I’m in,” PJ agrees readily. “We doing this tonight, or can I go see if Katie’s still awake?”
“Chill, you horny bastard. We’re doing this tonight.”
“What, exactly, are we doing?” I ask. “Because even though no one has asked me to weigh in on my own fucking life, let me be clear: I don’t have a savior complex. I like helping people. There’s a difference.”
Luke nods. “Yeah, there. Is. Helping people is shoveling your neighbor’s driveway or carrying their groceries inside. A savior complex is helping everyone all the time even at your own expense. It’s breaking up with your boyfriend because you think it’s better for him. It’s thinking you know best when you clearly fucking don’t.”
“Yes, I do.”
“No, you don’t. And tonight proves my point.”
“It proves nothing. Just because I—”
PJ stops me. “Hold up. Why do you have to save everyone? Why do you have to solve all the problems?”
Frustration mounts inside my head.“Why?Because if I don’t, they will.”
My brothers just look at me.
“God, don’t you get it? It feels good to be the one doing the saving instead of the one being saved.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Uh, my whole childhood? Or did you forget all the fights you got in to? The sneers? The name-calling. When Mom and Dad lost customers, even friends. The time Mom and Dad had to go to the freaking school board so I could take a guy to prom. You guys were always defending my honor. God, I was a helpless mess. You all had to take care of me, and though I was grateful, it sucked to be that helpless. But not anymore. I left Laramie and swore I’d never need saving again.”
PJ lays a calming hand on my shoulder. “Whoa, Ian. What the fuck? You’ve been holding on to all this for what? Six or seven years now?”
“First off,” Luke says, looking me in the eye, “we got into fights because those kids were being assholes. And we punch assholes.”
PJ shrugs in agreement. “Also, what makes you think you were the only one they saved?”
“What are you talking about? In case you don’t remember, I was a skinny ginger who came out in the eighth grade. Pretty sure it’s my ass they were saving for about five years running, if not longer.”
“Ian, they’re parents, and they protected their children—all three of us—like parents do.And we’re brothers. We stood up for you just like you take care of us. It’s called a family, college boy,” Luke says.
“Yes, but—”
“No,” PJ shakes his head.
“Yeah, we’re a family, but you two never needed help the way I did,” I sigh.
“Bullshit,” my older brother scoffs. “You remember when I got Katie pregnant?”
Luke throws a stray piece of popcorn at PJ’s head. “You’ve knocked her up four times. You may want to be a little more specific.”
Without missing a beat, PJ flips him the middle finger and continues on with his story. “The first time. Before we got married. Jesus, we didn’t even know she was pregnant until she was almost twelve weeks along. We both figured she was sick all the time because the kids at the daycare spread their germs around. Anyway, we told Mom and Dad and they were ecstatic, started making plans to move up the wedding. I was thrilled too. Scared shitless, but excited, you know? So, that evening I went out to do the final milking, and Katie went home. We were planning to tell her dad together, but I guess the doctor’s office called her dad’s landline while she was here and said she left her prescription behind. That led to a bunch of questions and basically, her dad kicked her out. She texted me frantically, said she was fighting with her dad, so I hauled my ass over there. By the time I got to her house, she was shaking and crying in the driveway while her dad was berating her. It was…bad. She was so upset she couldn’t drive, so I brought her here. We caught Mom and Dad up on everything, and I told them she’d be moving in a lot sooner than we figured. They nodded like they’d already thought that far ahead. Katie and I cleaned up after dinner, and Mom and Dad said they were going for a walk. Turns out they went to pay Katie’s dad a visit. He was over here later that night, offering a stiff apology. Granted, the man’s still an asshole, but at least he was being civil. That was all Mom and Dad. They read him the riot act and said if he ever wanted to see his grandchild, he’d better damn well get ahold of himself.
“And that’s not even the half of it, Ian. They took us in and helped us get started. They would not have had to do that. I was nineteen, just starting out, and I got lazy about condoms. They saved the day. Took care of us. Matter of fact, they still do. Katie’s sick as hell in the morning, and while I’m out milking, Mom gets the kids up and ready, and takes them down to our place for a couple of hours so Katie can rest.”
I see his point, but it’s not the same thing. “Ok, but what they did was the right thing. You two have been in love for so long it’s ridiculous. An unplanned pregnancy was hardly a scandal, and you were engaged anyway.It wasn’t a big deal.”
“You want to wake my wife up and tell her that? That, in your educated opinion, her dad calling her a whore was no big deal. You’re right. It was totally not a big deal for him to tell her that he was glad her mom was dead because it spared her the disappointment of seeing Katie unwed and pregnant.”
“Jesus. No. That’s not what I meant. Just that, of course mom and dad would do that. They’re good people.”
“Yeah, they are,” PJ agrees. “Which is why, when their son was bullied and mistreated, they took action.”
