* * *
Willa
I’m curled up in Knox’s arms, our bodies wrapped up in each other’s as he sleeps. I pause to take this moment in, to hold it in my memory and in my heart. I can’t stay, but I wish I could. More than any other time in my life, I wish things were different. But they’re not.
And I can’t rely on anyone else. My parents have certainly taught me that.
So I have to rely on myself.
As much as it breaks my heart to leave, I know it’s my only choice. It’s still dark outside, so I take my time untangling myself, careful not to wake him. Knox is a beautiful man—olive skin, black hair, eyes the color of dark chocolate, thick lashes. In sleep, he’s so peaceful, so calm.
I’m not foolish enough to think his bed will stay cold for long. But I hope he misses me for a moment just as much as I’ll surely miss him for the rest of my life. I pick his Rockvale hoodie up off the ground and fold it neatly, piling it on top of his jeans. Tracing my fingers along the tear in the cuff, I take a moment to wish things were different—to wish that I could stay here, that we could build something together. But they’re not and we can’t. Knox is going off to school soon—Rockvale, I’m guessing, wherever that is. And I’m going to make my own way, far from here. We’re from two different worlds, going in two different directions. And I’m better on my own. Tearing myself away from him now hurts like hell. I just have to remember that I’m saving future-me from inevitable heartbreak.
I pull on my clothes, and duck out of the tent, not daring to glance back at his sleeping form. If I do, my resolve will shatter, and I’ll never leave.
I make my way across the field and wave to a few other souls braving the early morning chill. No doubt they’re looking for a place to pee, so I just keep walking, acting like that’s what I’m doing, too.
If there’s one thing my parents taught me, it’s to look like you know what you’re doing. That way, no one will bother you. It works, and I’m back in my car heading east before the tears start to fall.
I don’t know where I’m going, but I know I can’t stay here.
Chapter 6
Knox
I slamthe door to The Chapel, the house I share at Bainbridge with Ty, Whit, and Booker, but no one scolds me. I took Whit’s advice, two days too late, and moved my ass up here. My furniture won’t come for a couple more days, so I’m sleeping on the floor, even though I could take the spare or Booker’s room or even a goddamn recliner.
Wouldn’t matter.
It’s not like I’m sleeping these days, not until I drink enough to pass out.
The past three days have been a blur of heartache and confusion, and I don’t see my life improving any time soon.
I woke up alone in a tent in the middle of a field.
I knocked on the door of every apartment in her building, but she was nowhere to be found. Finally, one of the maintenance crew took pity on me and let me know her dad had been fired, so they no longer lived there.
My next stop was the diner, but Darlene said she called in sick, something she’d never done before.
I drove for hours, but there was no sign of her. It’s like she vanished.
Every text I've sent has gone unanswered. Until the last one.
Knox: Please don’t do this. Don’t act like that week meant nothing.
Willa: We both knew this was never going to work out, Knox. We were temporary. I wish things were different, but they’re not. So consider this goodbye. That week meant everything, but it's over now.
Knox:This is it? It ends like this?
Willa:It has to.
Knox:It doesn’t, though. But fine. If that’s what you want? Goodbye.
Sometimes I half-convince myself that it was all a dream. That I got shitfaced and imagined every moment. It’s not entirely out of the realm of possibility, but then I remember the taste of her on my lips, the feel of her body on mine.
My week with Willa wasn’t a dream.
But life without her is a nightmare.
