“Listen to your woman. Is that the lesson?” I meet her gaze, ready to laugh, but at her wide-eyed expression I stop. “What’s the matter?”
“Am I your woman?”
Yes. No. I want you to be.My mouth opens to answer but the words get caught. Not from indecision, but for the complexity of our relationship. I want more with Opal. God, do I want more. But is it really a wise choice?
“Sorry.” She clenches her eyes shut and shakes her head as though she can erase her question. I should say something, but like a coward I don’t. The next episode ofHouse Huntersbegins to play, but Opal pops off her chair and goes into the kitchen.
She returns with a bottle of water for each of us. “You look better already.”That’s because I was never sick. Her eyes narrow and she doesn’t move to sit back down.
I can’t take the scrutiny and I sure as hell don’t look or feel sick. “I think I’m going to take a quick shower. Brush my teeth.”
She nods, finally stepping out of the way to let me pass.
* * *
The shower washes awaythe sweat and grossness from upchucking, but it doesn’t free the guilt. Doesn’t matter how much soap or water I use, betrayal hangs heavy in my mind. The closer I get to Opal, the more I want to tell her everything. But that’s a surefire way to ruin what we have. This past week has been the best in my life. Between make out sessions, writing music, and playing on stage every night, I am living the dream.
Only, sometimes it feels exactly like that. A dream. What happens when I wake up? Can I really keep my place in the band and earn Opal’s trust while feeding my uncle lies? Between his texts and the side conversations, I don’t know how much longer I can keep up this charade. It’s difficult to enjoy the ride when there’s an eject button that could detonate at any time.
I step out of the shower, dry my body, and shake off the bad mood that threatens to ruin the rest of the day. The kindest, most beautiful woman is out there waiting for me. My problems aren’t going away, so there’s no use in dwelling. I pull on a worn cotton shirt and pair of sweats. I’m playing sick. Might as well look the part.
“Hey.” Opal glances up from her phone and sets it on the counter. Her smile is shy and reserved. Still beautiful. “How do you feel?”
“Much better.” And it’s not a lie. One smile from her and everything feels good again. Not able to stand the distance between us, I step forward and rest my hands on her hips.
“If you leave now you might be able to catch them before the photo shoot.” She glances up from beneath her lashes. She doesn’t wrap her arms around my waist, and I can’t help but feel a tinge of disappointment.
“That’s okay. I’m sure it’s too late.” I shake my head. “Besides, it’s not often we have time like this.”
She presses her lips together and her chest rises with a long breath. “Alone.”
“Yeah, alone.”
“You weren’t really sick.” She’s not asking. It’s a statement, and I’m tired of lying.
I nod my head and gauge her reaction.
“Why?” Fuck, I was hoping she wouldn’t ask. I really don’t want to answer, but here’s my chance. My opportunity to come clean and lay it all out. She may hate my guts, and I’ll probably get kicked out of the band, but then again, she might understand. She might even offer forgiveness, and then . . . then we could begin. This time out of the shadow of my lies.
The possibility seems exhilarating, if only it could be guaranteed. Because the reality is, I can’t tell her. It’s not fair to drag her into my shit. No, I’ve made this mess. I can’t ask her to forgive me. I can’t even offer it to myself. No, there’s no way out of this clusterfuck.
My gaze drops to the floor and I shove my hands into my back pockets. The space between us feels so much further than a few inches. I’m at a crossroads, but I can’t bring myself to tell her. I just can’t. So instead I reach for the next best thing to the truth. “Because I wanted to be with you.”
At least it’s not a lie, but even I realize how twisted and fucked up it is to use this opportunity to gain something as precious as her.
She steps forward, her body flush with mine and her hands circle my waist. “I want you, Leighton. So much. I want to give you everything.”
“Everything?” The word comes out a question, as if I’m unsure what she means. Or maybe I need her to be more explicit if I’m even going to consider her offer.
“Make love to me. Here. Now.” Her big bright eyes scream an innocence and hunger that strikes an insatiable need to make her mine. To give what she’s asking.
My dick hardens and it takes all my control to not crush my lips to hers.Walk away.That’s the smart decision. I should, because once I make love to Opal, I’ll never want to stop.
“Please.” In one whispered word she unravels all my best intentions.
27
Opal
