“Thanks.” I nodded, crouched on the floor, and pulled out a clear plastic tub that was cracked. I reached for my bag and sorted my few clothes and personal items into thecontainer.
“Don’t thank me. They aren’t wrong. This place is theworst.”
I looked up to meet Amo’s calculating stare. “But youstay?”
She shrugged. “Only till I turn eighteen. Once I’m not the state’s, I’m blowing this joint and hitching a ride toDenver.”
“When’sthat?”
“Another month. You want to come too?” She quirked her eyebrow with what was seemingly an honestinvitation.
Even though we’d just met, I was tempted to take her up on the offer. “I’m only sixteen. I have two moreyears.”
She scoffed and grated her jaw. “Sad how we count down our last days of childhood like a prisonsentence.”
I’d never thought of it like that, but it was true. “Isn’t it,though?”
“You’re not so bad, Jess. Here.” She popped off her bed and pulled out a tube of lipstick. Before I had a chance to turn her away, she painted my lips the same bright red as hers. “There.” She nodded withapproval.
I lifted my fingers to my lips, the substance stickier than I imagined. I hadn’t worn lipstick before. Makeup was a luxury not afforded to girls without money or someone to buy it forthem.
“Don’t.” She grabbed my arm and pulled my hand back down to my side. “You’ll mess it up.” Before she went back to her bed she whispered in my ear. “He doesn’t like lipstick. Leaves marks.” Stepping back, she popped her lips with a smack andwinked.
“Thank you.” I mouthed the words more than saidthem.
Maybe this place wouldn’t be so bad after all. Like Amo said, I was counting down my sentence and only had two years left. After sixteen years in foster care, that wasn’t solong.
But I was wrong. Two years felt longer than an eternity in thisplace.
After my first week, Mr. Spiers worked me into his rotation, lipstick and all. It was embarrassing. It was humiliating. And afterward, I pretended it never happened. I continued to play pretend for the next few weeks, but I was breaking on the inside. I couldn’t live like this. I was used to fading into the background, but for the first time in my life, I was losing faith in who I was. Becoming a person even I didn’t recognize. The girls here were nice enough, and Amo took it upon herself to protect me as best she could. I wasn’t sure why, but I didn’t question it. As we drew closer to her eighteenth birthday, I worried how I would fare withouther.
It was the second Tuesday in November when Mrs. Spiers woke up, stumbled out of bed, and came upon her husband of forty-seven years receiving head from Tasha. Livid and blaming all of us, she started regularly locking us inside our rooms before her after-dinnercocktail.
“This is fucking bullshit. She can’t do this to us anymore and get away with it.” Tasha paced the length of our room. I personally didn’t understand why she was so upset. At least with us in here, Mr. Spiers would be keptaway.
“Hey, Jess,” Amo whispered, and waved me over to sit on her bed. “It’s happening. Tonight’s the last night we spend in thishellhole.”
I widened my eyes with surprise and a little fear. She was only ten days away from turning eighteen. “You’re runningaway?”
“We. We are running away. My friend in Denver will set us upthere.”
We. I’d never been part of a ‘we,’ and the word alone settled my fears. I’d do whatever Amo wanted. “You trusther?”
She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, or I wouldn’t have made the plan. Don’t tell me you’d rather stayhere.”
I bit at my lip and considered my options. I wanted to leave. Truly. But I knew it wasn’t that simple. At least here I could finish my education. I was fed and clothed. “Maybe Ishould.”
“No. You don’t get what I’m saying. You. Can’t. Stay. Not here. Make sure you take the long way home from school tomorrow, yeah?” Her eyes were hard to read but in them I saw a glimpse of somethingdangerous.
“What are you planning to do?” Iwhispered.
“Don’t worry about it.” She waved me off. “A little trust, Jess. I’ve gotthis.”
The next day, I took the long way home from school while the others walked ahead. I stopped in the corner drug store and browsed treats I couldn’t afford, tempted to take one and shove it inside my backpack. But I didn’t. I couldn’t risk getting busted for shoplifting with Amo waiting. That, and my pack was already stuffed with most of myclothes.
I dragged my feet with apprehension, not sure what Amo had planned. But as I got closer to the house, I spotted the thick plume of smoke rising over theneighborhood.
Oh,no!
