“Honestly, I’m good, thanks.” She stayed standing as she sipped her tea, watching Amira over her mug. Amira strolled around the apartment, picking things up and examining them, as if she was evaluating their seven years together.
Seven years. Marianne had been twenty-seven and about to land a place as a judge on a popular TV show. The restaurant she had worked at was the place to be seen in Dublin. She’d been attracted to the confident, glamorous older woman who’d dined there one night, then waited outside until Marianne had finished her shift to take her for a drink. One drink had turned to many. Amira had come home with her that night and never really left. At the time, she’d been deeply involved in her family’s business, and eventually it had emerged she was using it to fund her gambling habit. Her formidable mother had intervened and insisted Amira get help. In time, she’d appeared to make a good recovery from her addiction. When Amira had suggested going into business together, Marianne had truly believed her future was in safe hands.
Amira turned. “I’m sorry. I thought I was in control, I didn’t want…” She gestured around them. “This.”
“Then stop pretending everything’s okay. It’s not.” A wave of exhaustion spread through her, and she sank to the couch. “It’s all fucked.”
Amira joined her on the couch and they sipped their drinks in awkward silence.
“What are you going to do, really? With Denny? Wouldn’t it be best to get some stability back home before you decide what to do next?”
“I’m not really in the mood to take advice from you, Amira. I don’t think I ever will be again.” She pushed herself back up with more enthusiasm than she was feeling. “Denny will be safe, I’lldo regular video calls, and when we’re both settled, we’ll make arrangements for you to see him.”
She took their mugs to the kitchen, rinsed them out and placed them on the otherwise empty shelf as she looked out at the city. She’d thought this place would be her home for a long time. Whatever she did next, she’d make sure she didn’t rely on anyone else for her future success.
EIGHT
The namethat flashed up on the phone screen both surprised and pleased Joey. They’d been wondering how Marianne was getting on and had convinced themself she’d gone back to Dublin without telling them. Not that Joey deserved a personal farewell, but they’d hoped to wish her luck and say goodbye to sweet little Denny.
They rolled out of their hammock to answer. “Marianne, how are you?”
“Hi, Joey, I’m still stumbling on.” Her video flicked on, and she looked so lost Joey’s heart went out to her. “I’m leaving the apartment today, and I just had the strange idea of coming back to Inishderry for a few days.”
Joey ran their hand through their hair and turned on their video, too, hoping they didn’t look too startled. “Really? I thought you’d have a plan by now.”
“Yeah. Well, I haven’t, and I feel like my head’s all over the place and I can’t think straight. When we were there the other weekend, I felt relaxed and happy. And Denny loved it.”
“Okay, do you want me to speak to Kasia and get you mates’ rates at the Waterside?”
Marianne blinked. “That’s the thing. I don’t have any money. I still have a working credit card, but I’m going to need that for essentials while I get back on my feet. I can’t spend it all on hotel fees.”
“I’m not sure we’ll find you a rental at short notice this time of the year. The nice ones get booked up in advance.”
“I was wondering if I could stay with you for a few nights?” The words came out in a tumble and Marianne’s cheeks flushed.
Joey held their breath. As well as being a refuge from the world, their home was tiny. And far too basic for someone like Marianne.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked. I wouldn’t if I wasn’t at my wits’ end. I’ll find somewhere, don’t worry.” Mari had clasped her folded arms until the skin was white beneath her fingers.
Joey wished they could take her hands and unclasp them. It hurt their heart to see her so upset. How could they not help? “Of course you can stay. It’s not a big space, but I’ll sleep next door with my dad. You can have the place to yourselves for a couple of days.”
Marianne’s hands unclasped and the tightness eased in Joey’s own body.
“It means so much to me, Joey. Thank you. I promise it’ll just be a few days while I reset.”
“You’re very welcome. It’ll be good to see you again. Just let me know when you’re due and I’ll have the place ready.”
“Would today be okay? On the last ferry?”
Jesus. What was her plan if Joey had said no? “Of course, yeah. I’ll pick you up then.”
“Thanks a million, Joey. You’ll never know how much this means to me.”
Joey rang off and spent the next two hours making their small cottage safe for a toddler. There wasn’t too much to do in the limited space. They collected all the work equipment andtook it out to the shed where it should be. It was too easy to bring in a pot to fix or a rope to join. It was so rare Joey had company in the cottage it didn’t matter. There had been a time when Kasia would come over to enjoy the morning sunrises, but those days were rare now, and they were much more likely to go and stay at the Waterside. So, while the cottage was always spotlessly clean, it had become a little cluttered.
Half an hour before the ferry was due, they stood and surveyed their home. It was clean and neat and contained nothing that could harm a small child. They checked the tiny spare room that served as an office when they were playing at developing their business. They’d covered the single bed with an old bedspread decorated with a sailing boat, and on the windowsill was a model fishing craft they’d assembled one cold and lonely winter. That was the most child-friendly they had to offer.
Their own room was tidied and aired, and their old, tired sheets had been replaced with a new set they’d been planning to break out but had never bothered.
