“You won’t find a good job outside of the city. Where will you live?”
Marianne sighed. She didn’t need this inquisition. “I haven’t decided where I’m going next, but I’m in no rush to head back to Dublin.”
“Are you ashamed, is that why?”
Her mum knew her all too well. It was strange she felt more anonymous in a small city than back in the sprawling capital where she’d grown up.
Her mum’s face broke into a jubilant smile. “I knew it. You don’t want to come crawling back here with your tail between your legs.”
“Mum, please. I’m not up to your jibes. Can’t you be more…” She wanted to say maternal, but that was the very thing Amira was always accusing her of. And she knew those two issues were linked.
“What do you want me to say, Marianne?”
She ran her hands through her short hair, wishing it was long enough to grip properly. She had a strong desire to pull it in frustration. “I just want you to care, Mum. Maybe tell me you’re sorry it happened to me. I don’t know.”
Her mother shook her head. “Oh, for heaven’s sake, of course I’m sorry. That goes without saying. But you have to plan. It’s not just yourself you need to think about now.”
Didn’t she know that all too well? “We need to leave the apartment by the weekend. I’ll have decided what I’m doing by then.”
“Well, if you change your mind, there’s always a room for you and my grandson here.”
“Thanks, Mum. I’ll bear that in mind.”If all the rooms in hell are taken.
Marianne stoodat the door as Amira pulled up in the hired van, her brother sitting alongside her. Marianne had already put most of her personal belongings in storage, before Amira arrived to take their furniture and her own possessions back to Dublin.
Taz smiled at her awkwardly, and enthusiastically volunteered to take his nephew out for a walk. Once they’d left, the atmosphere cooled.
“You’ve been busy.” Amira looked around.
“Trying to salvage small parts of my life? Yes, I have.”
“Don’t be dramatic, Marianne. It’s not easy for me either.”
“But you’re somehow taking all of our furniture and shared belongings.”
“We’ve discussed it already. I’ll sell what I can. The business is in joint names, so the sooner we can clear our debt, the better for both of us.”
“Your debt.” Marianne was disgusted enough with herself without allowing Amira to smear her further.
“If you continue to be so petty about it, you’ll make everything so much harder.”
Marianne dug her nails into the palm of her hand. “There’s nothing petty about any of this, Amira. This is a pretty monumental fuck up.”
“Let’s work together to sort it out and then we can go our separate ways.”
“Except that’s never going to happen, is it? Our paths will cross again and again, as we ensure our little boy has a relationship with his two parents. And his grandparents. And bloody Taz.” She gestured to the door. “And every time I’ll have to look at your stupid, smug face, and remember how you tore up our lives and never took the smallest bit of responsibility for it.”
“Whoa, Marianne. I thought we agreed to be civil. For Denny’s sake.”
She was sure now her nails were drawing blood. The first time they’d talked, she’d been too stunned to react fully, and when they’d spent hours poring over spreadsheets trying to find a way forward, she’d been too busy with the practical to entertain how she felt emotionally. But a floodgate had opened now and she was struggling to stem the flow.
They were still standing close to the door. She hadn’t even allowed Amira to come in and sit down. She might as well enjoy her beloved vintage Chesterfield one last time. “Sit down and I’ll make tea. When Taz comes back, I’ll take Denny and leave you to it.” She went into the kitchen to calm down. By the time the kettle had boiled, she felt in control, and she took the two mugs back in.
Amira turned from flicking through their joint vinyl collection. “You’ve not taken your favorites.”
“Amira, I’m homeless with a small child. I’m not that bothered about a collection of records you chose to make us look cool when we had guests.” She wasn’t doing too well with the civility.
“I’ll take everything to Mum’s, and when you’re settled you can come and collect anything you want.”
