Shaking fingers threaded through mine, and it was only then that I noticed how nervous Chase was. His breathing came in ragged, and not just from our kisses. “What is it?”
Chase’s swallow was audible as he pulled away, hand still grasped in mine. He pulled me out the front door and toward my car. I had to fight the chuckle because, in his enthusiasm, I didn’t have time to grab my keys. “Slow down. What’s going on?”
Chase heaved. “I... I just need to do this before I lose my nerve.”
It was strange to see him so vulnerable. This was even different from the first time we’d had sex when we’d been scared and probably too young. Chase wrapped his arms around himself as I raced back into the house to grab my keys. I locked up and let him into my car. Once we were inside and I started it up, a silence fell between us and whatever Chase was trying to show me... Maybe he’d lost his nerve to do it. I’d let the opportunity pass me by.
“Do we need to go back inside?” I asked, reaching across the center console and squeezing his thigh.
Chase took a shuddery breath, squeezing his eyes closed. “No. Just give me a moment. I need you to drive. Just drive toward Aberdeen, and I’ll tell you when to stop.”
It was possibly one of the strangest requests I’d ever gotten, but I started the car and drove to the edge of town. In the few weeks that I’d been here, I’d failed to realize that the Dawson’s store was now something different entirely. Instead of beachy curios, it now housed a candy shop, not that Ocean Shores didn’t have enough of those…
The second I drove past Chase’s parents’ house, and he sank into his seat, I knew something significant had happened, and I’d missed all the signs. The fact that Chase didn’t want to talk about his family. That no one in town mentioned them.
My palms slipped against the steering wheel as they grew sweaty the further out of town we drove. Chase’s gaze remained glued out the window. I hadn’t even bothered to turn on the radio, not that there was much to listen to out here outside of an outdated country station.
Once I started down a long and very windy road, Chase sat up a little straighter in his seat, like he was watching for something in particular. He must have spotted it because when we passed a highway marker, he asked me to pull over.
The road was shrouded with thick evergreen trees that blocked a good portion of the sunlight. Signs along this strip of road called for the use of headlights during the day. I cut the engine, and Chase sat for a few moments, his eyes closed as he took deep, steadying breaths.
“Are you... okay?” The amount of genuine concern I had for him overwhelmed my curiosity about our location. This was a random spot on the side of the road. It was in the middle of nowhere. A lonely bit of highway between Ocean Shores and Aberdeen.
Without saying a word, he opened the door and stepped out onto the road. Chase stuffed his hands into his pockets before walking a little ways ahead and stopping to stare at the trunk of a large pine tree that was covered in scarring. I made no moves to join him because I had no clue what any of this was about. We were on the damn highway, staring at a damn tree.
Chapter 24
Chase
Get out of the car. Get out of the car. Get out of the car.
Maybe if I repeated it enough in my head, Nathan would hear my thoughts without having to actually say something. This was the last place my parents were alive, so bringing him here was hard enough.
After their bodies were extracted and identified, I was called out. The scarring on the tree had faded considerably, as it was mostly grown over with moss. But I’d always know this spot. There was no forgetting the sight of the twisted metal when Drew had driven me out here to verify that it was their car.
I closed my eyes and tried to steady my breathing. Feeling the ache in my chest once more, I battled against the burning sensation behind my eyelids.
As if by some miracle, Nathan must have heard my thoughts. His arms wrapped around me, and I sank into his body. In this place, I couldn't fight the tears. He didn’t say anything, but words weren’t needed. His presence alone was enough to comfort me. Isoaked in the scent of his body wash, and the smell that was so uniquely him.
Once the tears finally calmed, we sat and looked at the tree until my throat had unclogged enough to form the words.
“Mom and Dad had gone shopping. It was so stupid because we didn’t really need anything. I think they just wanted to get out for a bit.” My chest constricted, but I kept powering on. “It had snowed the day before, and this stretch of road was pretty icy. I don’t know what happened because Dad knew how to drive in it. The police said the tires on the car were worn, which probably didn’t help...”
I knew the exact second Nathan realized what I was talking about and the significance of the marks on the trunk of the tree. Gently, he kissed the side of my head while his arms tightened around me.
“When did this happen?”
“Three years ago.”
His whole body locked up, and it was as if he knew why I’d freaked out when he didn’t return, why his poor excuse hurt just a little more.
“How come no one told me?”
I wanted to laugh. Instead, that anger simmered beneath the surface again. I wanted to shove his arms off me and march all the way back to town. I didn’t give a damn that it was a good ten miles away.
“Why would they? You proved that you didn’t care when you never came back.”
“Oh, God. I’m so fucking sorry.” His arms tightened, even though I didn’t think it was possible. I was suffocating in his embrace. His apology wasn’t good enough. It would never be good enough, but it didn’t change what I’d said to Daniel in my drunken haze the other night. I was very much still in love with Nathan Grant, despite the shitty circumstance we found ourselves.
