“Now we’re talking.” Luna smiles.
“More layers means more protection,” I explain. “He won’t have easy access to my… you know… if I have a ton of fabric on.”
“I bet he just cuts it off you,” Georgia says.
I glare at her. “If he comes near me with a knife, that knife is going to end up in his neck.”
“And stain your wedding dress? Don’t do that,” Luna says. “You’re going to have a daughter one day and you will want to pass it down to her.”
“I’m never having kids, because I’m never having sex with Carlo. This marriage is in name only.”
“How are you going to get him to agree to that?” Georgia asks.
“I’m going to make him hate me enough to agree to separate bedrooms. No,separate houses. Separate countries would be even better. I can see myself living in France.”
“Here you go. Let me help you. Back this way.” The saleswoman returns with a pile of white sparkly fabric in her hands.
Once I have the dress on, I stare at myself in the mirror. I know I told the girls I wanted a big dress for the extra layers, but that’s not the total truth. I always dreamed of a dress just like this. It’s strapless, rhinestones covering a corset before it balloons out into a huge hoop skirt draped in delicate tulle and lace.
“This is the one,” I say. “Help me get it off?”
“You don’t want to go show your friends?” the woman asks.
“Nope, I’m good,” I tell her.
I head back over to where Luna and Georgia are waiting while the saleswoman slips out behind me.
“I said yes to the dress!” I announce to the room. “I need you two to pick your own dresses, something lilac. I have to go. I’m sorry.” I hug each of them and hightail it out of the store before they can stop me.
I only get to my car, when I spot two large figures standing on the sidewalk. “Hey, I was looking for you.” Carlo walks towards me. Brian stays back and watches.
“Why?” My arms fold across my chest.
“I forgot to give you something the other night.” He pulls a small box from his pocket. “If we had more time, I’d do thisright. We both know you deserve better, Antonia. But we don’t have time so this is how it’s happening.” He proceeds to show me a ring. A huge—freaking shiny—diamond ring.
I’m still stunned. Even when Carlo reaches out, pries my left hand out from where my arms are folded, and slides the ring on to my finger.
“I’m really glad it’s you that I get to marry,” he says.
“Yeah, if I actually had a choice in this, I wouldn’t marry you if you were the last man on earth.” My shoulder bumps into his as I pass him. “Take me home, Brian,” I say before climbing into the back of the car and slamming the door shut, the diamond on my finger feeling like a weight.
It might as well be handcuffs and chains.
Chapter Five
How do I tell my daughter I’m getting married today? I’ve been putting it off. I don’t know why, but it’s just not the easiest thing to bring up to Jazzy. We’ve been doing really well. She is beginning to trust me, and I don’t want to do anything to impact that. I really should have thought this through before I volunteered myself.
I wasn’t thinking, though. I heard Antonia being offered up like a prized cow at auction, and I swooped in. She might not see it that way, but I’m doing this for her. Fuck if I’m letting her end up married to some abusive asshole.
“Hey, Jazzy, can we talk?” I knock on her open bedroom door.
“Step into my salon.” She waves her hand around the small table she’s set up to paint her nails.
“Should six-year-olds really be wearing nail polish?” I ask her.
“I’m almost seven, and Mama and me used to paint our nails together all the time before…” Jazzy’s words trail off.
“Before what?” I ask, sitting on the other side of the table.
