I step closer, lifting my free hand to touch his lower lip with the tip of my finger. “I haven’t seen you in a while. I think the only right choice is me sleeping in your bed. With you.”
He swallows hard and nods before leading me to the staircase. The wood creaks quietly beneath our feet, and I count the steps to the top. Seventeen. Another fifteen steps to his bedroom door. Twelve to his bed. My suitcase hits the floor with a thump. Before I know it, my body is pinned to the mattress, and Holden is kissing me as if our lives depend on it.
I let out a soft sigh, a nearly silent moan, as heat and want flare to life. The time apart has done nothing to quell how I feel about him—how much I crave his touch—how I need the fire he stokes inside of me. Right now, the doubts I’ve felt drift away. I can no longer remember how I wondered if he’s as invested in this as I am. And when did it grow to be so serious? So fast, so sudden, but… Maybe not so bad.
My body thrums, vibrates, and I feel I could take flight but only remain because he holds me so securely.
“Yo, Holden! Where’d ya go?”
Holden groans at the voice echoing through the house, pulling back to let his head fall into the curve of my neck. “I hate them.”
“No, you don’t.” But I understand his frustration.
“They’ll come looking for me,” he warns me; his breath comes out in a shuddering gust against my skin, and I shiver. He lifts himself up and pushes my hair behind my ear. “We should go.”
I reluctantly nod, and he pushes off the bed. His hand wraps around mine, and I allow him to pull me to my feet. Another kiss, this time chaste and sweet, then we head toward the lion’s den waiting for me.
A small group of people sit at the table on the large second-story deck, and I inhale slowly to calm my thundering heart. Holden leads me to an outdoor loveseat closest to the door and waits until I’ve sat to take his place beside me.
“You must be Dealla.”
“I am.”
The man who’d spoken grins, dimples as on display as the tattoos marking his skin in the gap of his unbuttoned shirt. He shoves long brown hair out of his face then reaches out to shake my hand. “Eddie. We’ve heard alotabout you.”
“Almost thought Holden made you up, though,” another man announces.
“Shut up, Phil,” groans Holden as the others laugh.
“It’s true!” Eddie says. “We’d never even seen pictures!”
I lean into Holden’s side while he puts an end to the teasing and makes introductions. John is his best friend from childhood, married to Evelyn who lounges in her chair as a cat does in sunlight. Phil’s wife Samantha pipes in with random bits of information obviously hand-selected to embarrass Holden, tidbits of his life gathered over the last seven years that they’ve known each other. Cheryl, Eddie’s girlfriend, mostly stays quiet, but her gaze says enough.
Phil’s phone vibrates on the table, and he checks it before disappearing inside. When he returns a few moments later, a child is held in his arms. The toddler blinks sleepily in my direction then stares up at Phil. Phil’s face softens, and he kisses his son’s forehead before turning his attention to me.
“This is Henry.”
“He’s adorable,” I eke out, though my throat has grown tight. My chest aches, hollow and cold, and my arms feel dreadfully empty.
“You okay?” Holden whispers.
All I can do is nod. He understands, of course he does. He tells me I can go make the phone call, no one would be upset if I take five minutes. They would all understand, no judgment. I’m touched by his consideration, but I stay where I am. Katie would be pissed if I call right now, and the ensuing freak-out would damper my chances of any contact with Ashton while I’m gone. Maybe even after I got back. So I stare out over the backyard as the voices around me blend and blur with conversation I can’t find it in me to join.
A small hand lands on my arm, and I jerk at the touch. Henry stands beside me, his fingers clutching a strawberry. He holds it up to me with a sweet smile, and I take it with a ‘thank you very much’. He beams and watches me closely until I bite off a chunk of the berry, then he runs away to the fruit platter on the other side of the table. Holden is staring at me with his head cocked, something indecipherable in his eyes, when I catch his gaze. To my surprise, he leans forward to kiss my lips in front of all his friends.
The hours spent with the group go by fast. One minute, I’m chatting with Eddie and Samantha about our favorite meals, with the occasional interruption as Henry brings more fruit. The next, the sun has slipped below the horizon, and everyone prepares to leave. Eddie doesn’t give me a choice: He embraces me tightly, quickly, before releasing me. John and Evelyn merely wave before heading inside. A worn-out Henry leaves a kiss on my cheek, and Phil and Samantha bid us a quick goodnight as they head to the door. Cheryl keeps her gaze averted from me, says goodbye to Holden, and joins the couple in exiting the house.
I help carry in the few dishes, and Holden and I wash them together. As soon as I’ve set the last plate in the drying rack, he steps closer and cages my body between his and the counter. My lips burn with the heat of the kiss, my head swimming. I moan low in my throat as his hands skim my body, my body that arches into his touch as if it’s craved him like an addiction. Oh, God, what an addiction it would be.
In tandem, we rush from the kitchen and through the living room, up the stairs, into his bedroom. Holden’s hands are feverish, relentless, as he helps me strip, and I do the same for him. He stands nude before me only seconds later, and I groan at the sight. My hands curve over his shoulders, and he goes where I push, sitting on the bed with a heavy exhale. His breathing grows unsteady as I straddle his lap, chest-to-chest and hearts beating together. My teeth catch on his bottom lip; I nip gently, and he gasps and tugs me closer. One calloused hand slips between us, and I bite back a gasping moan as his thumb presses against me.
No words are spoken in the heady silence of the room, the quiet broken only by our shake breaths and soft sounds as we move together. His hands leave flaming paths on my flesh, but it’s nothing compared to the inferno burning me clean from the inside out. I swallow down Holden’s moan, the kiss hard and insistent and bruising. A sharp pain blossoms to life in my waist where his nails dig into my skin; he helps me to rise and fall, to ride the devastatingly breathtaking wave crashing through me. I let out an airy cry of his name. He shushes me—reminds me that John and Evelyn are just down the hall—but I can’t focus on anything but how I tremble. How Holden holds me, so strong and beautiful andright. He buries his face against my throat and lets my skin absorb his groan.
My body is heavy, sated in ways I will cherish for as long as I live. I run my fingers through Holden’s damp hair, shivering when his lips brush along my collarbone, then he falls back to lie on the bed. His hand runs along my side, and the smile on his face gives me the same butterflies I’ve felt since the beginning.
“Fuck, but I missed you,” I murmur before leaning down to kiss him.
“I missed you, too.”
