“That’s what a good servant is – unobtrusive, hard-working, willing,” Two told him in the gym the following Sunday. “I know that goes against everything you’ve known all your life, everything you were taught, and every expectation of you from an early age. You were destined to be part of a powerful elite,but instead you find yourself merely a faceless servant. Embrace your anonymity, Alex, use it as a cloak of protection, and it will keep you safe.”
Two still stood behind him in the gym, facing the large mirrors. He put his arm around Alex and rested a hand on his midriff.
“It’s time for the lesson you’ve been waiting for. Empty your mind, focus on your breathing, and watch me.”
Alex watched in the mirror as all trace of Two’s personality disappeared. His eyes went perfectly vacant, his face blank. “It’s a negation of ego, an ability to disappear at will, to let nobody in and allow nobody to see the real you,” Two explained, his hand still pressed firmly over Alex’s solar plexus. “Now, it’s your turn.”
Alex tried, but it was harder than it seemed. He could manage it for a few seconds, but then he was distracted by a sound outside, or Two would make him laugh, or startle him, and then he was back, and it was all too obvious in his reflection.
“Damn it,” he sighed. “How do you make it look so easy?”
“Like all things one wishes to be good at – practice,” Two told him firmly. “I didn’t learn how to do this overnight.”
“Why did you learn it at all?” Alex asked.
“I witnessed many things in my early years working in the big hotels of New London. Most of those things I’d rather not have seen, frankly. One of them was women in a state of undress with their houders or husbands. Some men treat a servant like part of the furniture and pay you no attention, but others really don’t like the idea of you looking at their woman. I learned to show no interest and have no reaction, no matter what I saw.”
“You must have so many stories to tell.”
Two gave an enigmatic smile. “I do, but I don’t tell them. You won’t, either. Discretion is an important part of being a good servant. The only thing you will tell, one day, is the story of Solange’s death – and you willonlytell it to someone youare absolutely certain has both the ability and desire to bring Mr Tyler to justice. Everything else is private. Secret. You will learn to be the soul of discretion.”
Alex worked harder than he ever had in his life, but he enjoyed it. He could see the value in everything he was being taught, and how it would help when he had to one day face Tyler again.
Days turned into weeks. He had no idea when he’d have to leave Belvedere, so he made the most of every day, cramming as much into them as he could, studying until late into the evening. Three, Four, and Five were surprised by the change in him, but it had the effect of making them work harder, too, and soon they were all competing to be the best in B’s lessons, their enthusiasm infectious as they all lifted each other. Alex had never thought to make friends again after Solange and Ted, but he felt close to them all.
“It’s a mistake,” Two said, when Alex confided this to him. “You can’t have friends, Alex. You know that.”
“You’remy friend,” Alex pointed out.
“And that’s almost certainly a mistake, too.”
“I’m only human,” Alex said miserably. “How can I possibly get through the next however many years without something as simple and life-sustaining as friendship?”
“That’s what you need to work on. You will be isolated, Alex. Itwillbe lonely.” Two gazed at him keenly. “But it’s the only way.”
Alex wasn’t so sure it had to be that severe. He could keep his secret and still have friends, couldn’t he?
F continued to be a bully. He didn’t hit anyone again, but they all felt his moods and the force of his tongue lashings. Alex loathed the man, but he bit his tongue and forced himself to smilepleasantly at him. He practised Two’s mask trick every day, but he still couldn’t consistently empty his face at will, and found it even harder around F.
“You must concentrate and try harder,” Two admonished after one incident when he’d pulled a face at F’s departing back. “It might seem like a small thing, and you might be quite sure nobody is looking, but it’s a slip-up, Alex, and you can’t afford a single mistake. Your life might very well depend on it, and the success of your mission certainly will.”
D softened towards him now the photo incident had receded in their minds, and resumed smuggling him little sweet treats with his meal. The other indies all laughed and teased him about this, but Two took a dim view.
“You must learn how to stop this kind of thing, so it’s not a problem when you return to your houder,” he admonished when they were doing yoga later that evening.
“What’s the harm in it?” Alex demanded. “She’s such a poor little creature. If it gives her pleasure to bring me things, then why stop it?”
“Because it creates an obligation, a sense of friendship, and that will make things harder and more complicated for you back in the real world, Alex.”
“I don’t agree with you on this,” Alex said stubbornly. “I haven’t encouraged it or asked her to do it. It’s not my doing.”
“Agreed – but it could be your undoing,” Two said firmly.
Alex was exhausted. He’d been burning the candle at both ends for weeks, had done everything Two had asked of him, and he’d had enough.
“Oh, just fuck off,” he snapped. “I’m sick of you being so bloody well sure you’re right all the time. I’m sure you must have made at leastsomefriends in all your years as an IS.”
“I’m not you. I don’t have the baggage you’re carrying around,” Two pointed out.
