“Azrael.” Micah’s voice raises, and I calm the uncharacteristic snarl that was forming on my lip and clamp my mouth shut, waiting. “The arrows don’t work on Cherubs.”
Everything stills, even the air around us seeming to hold its breath as I stare. "Wha... what?" I whisper.
The smile he offers me has a touch of sadness to it. “Everything you feel, everything you’veeverfelt for this man, is real. There’s no magic behind it. Nothing fake.”
Relief, so potent it takes my breath away, almost knocks me to the ground, and my lips separate in a quiet sob. My eyes squeeze shut, hot tears streaming down my face as the flimsy armor I’d constructed to shield myself crumbles into a million pieces, leaving me exposed and vulnerable.
Split wide open and raw, every emotion I’ve been trying to suppress comes rushing out, and I’m regretful and sad andsorry, so fucking sorry. Apologetic and ashamed and…
And happy.
Another sob wracks through my body as I fill my lungs and allow myself a moment to soak in its warmth.
Happiness. Belonging. And for once in my life… acceptance.
It’s real.
Real.
“I love him,” I whisper.
“So you do,” he mutters, almost to himself, before his voice returns to his normal level. “Get comfortable, Azrael. It would seem we have a lengthy discussion ahead of us.”
The low, guttural rumble of Beau’s truck reaches me long before the red monstrosity pulls into the parking lot. Despite my nerves, a shaky smile tugs at my face as his beaming grin finds me through the windshield.
He jogs over, wearing a pair of athletic shorts and a navy-blue polo shirt, a cap covering his unruly hair. He spins it as he approaches, because he doesn’t want it in the way when he kisses me.
I never understood the fixation with backward caps until this man.
“Hey, darlin’,” he mutters, sweeping me into his arms as he presses his lips to mine. “I hate going this long without seeing you.”
“It’s been two days,” I tease, and he grins, unashamed.
“Yeah, I know, but that’s two days too many. It’s Friday, and I, uh, wasn’t sure if you wanted to spend the weekend with me again.”
“I do… I really do, I swear.” We walk hand in hand along the path as I work up my nerve, and he follows my lead without question. Outdoors in public seemed like the better way to approach this, but I’m second guessing my decision to meet in the park. The privacy of his house might have been smarter, but now that he’s here, I can’t wait any longer.
“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” So, so heartbreakingly gentle, he uses a finger to tip my face to his. Whatever he sees there makes his lips pull into a hard, flat line as his breathing speeds up. “No, no, Az, no… please don’t end this… I’m not ready,” he whispers, his grip on me tightening. “Don’t break my heart, not yet.”
“I’ll try,” I whisper back, offering him a trembling half-smile. “We are long overdue for a conversation, and we both know it. All those answers you’ve been asking for? It’s time you got them.”
“Alright,” he says, voice strained as we sit on a bench, and he turns, pulling his ankle over his knee as he twists to face me. Arm stretched across the back of the bench, he brushes my shoulder with his fingertips, as though he can’t stand not touching me.
“The, um, cousin I’ve been staying with?”
“Let me make sure I’m following… this is the cousin whose house you’re Tourette’s-proofing?” That flimsy lie suffered a drawn-out death long ago, if the lift of his brow and deadpan delivery tell me anything.
I nod. “That would be the one. Look, Beau, you’ve already figured out there is no cousin. I was… sent here for work when we met.”
“Where have you been living? Oh, God, please don’t tell me you’re married…”
“No, no, no,” I hurry to say as panic crosses his face. “Nothing like that, Iswear. But there have been no Ubers, and I haven’t been staying in town. Any night I’m not with you, I sleep at home. Alone,” I add, but his expression only twists in confusion.
“But… you said you live far away.”
“I do,” I whisper with a gulp. “Thing is, Beau… I have a very…uniquejob, and for you to understand what I do, you have to understand that I’m not exactly—”
Past his shoulder, movement catches my attention and steals my words as I crane my head to stare. The world halts, everything happening at once.
