Others shared their hearts freely yet receivedno answer.
Melis, have I angered you? Or is it as theywhisper, that I am your favorite and you keep me this way becausemy yearning pleases you?
Melis, child of the wind, is this what youhave chosen for me in your wisdom? Is my loneliness meant to markme as yours? I will be the priest of Desire if you wish it. Butonly tell me if it’s meant to be Desire only or DesireFulfilled?
I thought this one loved me, Melis, but theywere like the others. Is it not you I have angered, but some othergod?
Melis of Many Forms, am I to be foreveralone? I confess, I find myself wishing it was true that you favorme so this is not divine punishment for something I haveunwittingly done to offend you.
I… I thank you for the gift of wanting. Thekeenness of my feelings serves you so I will try to be grateful.But I cannot help but dream as I cannot help my hurt upon wakingalone again. I only hope this hurt at least pleases you, One WhoReunites Souls, Melis of Passion and Longing, Desire in All ItsForms. In which case, I thank you again, Melis, for your favor.
One human daring to call Melis by his propernames. One voice low and husky with pain while thanking Melis forthe loneliness causing that pain. Melis could have blushed like ahuman, and was not entirely sure he didn’t, because this one voicehe had not answered.
He hadn’t thought he’d have to, he defendedhimself sharply as he reached the gates of the palace, althoughthere was no one to witness his internal wriggling. And…perhapsit had been pleasant to hear his proper namesspoken, even in whispers in private prayers. Desire could havedesires too, Melis decided with some irritation, and hearing hisreal names was not a dream that should bother anyone.
Feathers ruffled with irritation at gods whomight judge him, Melis muttered under his breath and moved throughthe sliver of space between the closed gates.
The palace itself was nothing to the homes ofsome of the gods, but remarkable for the world of humans, althoughnot for the reasons other humans might have imagined. The palacehad the signs of a considerate ruler who cared for his people. Thehalls were clean. The walls draped with well-tended greenery.Fountains of clear water splashed gently in several locations, asthey splashed gently in all the fountains in the city. Where notlit by the light of the charmed moon, corridors of white or paintedstone were illuminated by oil lanterns. Soldiers, already in cloaksthough Autumn had only begun to stretch out her arms, kept watch inpairs throughout the grounds, some petting contented guard dogs topass the time, others telling stories.
Servants were still at work, although not many.Most were settling in for the night in the kitchen to enjoy anibble of cheese or some wine from the well-stocked cellars. Melislistened to the longing thoughts of one attending to the needs ofone of the ladies of the house, who was apparently beyond lovely,perhaps even as beautiful as her brother, the king. The servant wasin awe of such a family, surely favored by many of the gods intheir temperament, wisdom, and looks.
Then, almost in the same moment she thought it,the servant stopped to mourn the fate of such a house, gifted inall things except matters of the heart. There was some hope for thelovely sister, but though the king had found lovers and sought asuitable match with someone of noble blood from any of the nearbycities, no one had chosen to stay with him.
At first, rumor had supposed the young kingcapricious, as the young could be. Then, those abroad had whisperedthat the king must have some flaw, some misfortune or streak ofheartlessness that had repulsed potential partners and sent hiscurrent lovers fleeing.
Now, with his city prosperous and thriving andhis people ferociously defending him, a new story was carried onthe wind: the kind, handsome, thoughtful king had been cursed,stung by The Prankster, Melis the Cruel, to be aloneforevermore.
King Antero had angered Many-Formed Desire, thewind whistled. He had beheld Melis’ true face and turned from him,and Melis in his fury had doomed the king to want but never knowthe other part of his soul, or to receive the kind of love he hadoffered so many.
Melis stopped to stare down at the shrine belowof one of the palace’s many fountains, unsurprised to see Motherand Harvest and The One Beneath the Waves honored so prominently ina palace on a cliff above the sea, in a kingdom where the peoplewere plump and well-fed. It was the small, winged figure set amongthe greater gods that stole his breath. The face had not beencarved, but wings had been cut into the stone with feathers thatlooked as light as a dove’s. Equally detailed was the tiny stonecrown of roses resting on the figure’s head, crooked and playfulinstead of straight and dignified the way the other figures woretheir crowns.
The carver had given the figure a massivephallus. Melis ducked his head to consider the bulge beneath histunic. Some expected a big cock on their god of Desire. Others didnot. Melis was depicted as young and old, virile and handsome,curving and fertile, or purely a mischievous youth who had nothingof note between his legs because he’d never fucked or been fuckedand thus didn’t understand the consequences of his actions. Eachform was heavy with expectation and some judgment.
Too beautiful, King Antero had mourned tohimself,they fear I will be unfaithful.
Not beautiful enough.Antero’s thoughtshad held a trace of bitterness tinged with wry amusement.I donot live up to the stories they tell of me.
That had been a lie told by one of Antero’spotential betrotheds. Melis had heard the truth as the betrothedhad stewed to himself on his way out of the city. The betrothed hadloved another he could not have, someone themselves already in lovewith, or at least enamored with, King Antero. The would-bebetrothed had wanted to wound the king, and wound he had.
Melis had heard it all and not answered. Not thebetrothed and not the king, although he had eased the suffering ofthe innocent third party, coming to this sea-cliff city to ensurethe short, pretty human had found someone new to gaze upon fondly.Someone not the former-betrothed and also not the king.
If the king had gazed back at that short, prettyhuman, then Melis could have blessed their union. Human rules aboutwho could or couldn’t marry kings were inconsequential; if a personfound part of their soul in another, even a mortal, even a god,then they should reach for each other. And like gods, if kingswanted to be with someone, they would find a way.
But gods could be as cowardly as some humans,and it was easier for them all to blame Melis. One would thinkthey’d know not to mess with someone capable of making evenbloodthirsty conquerors and fearsome gods go weak-kneed and stupid.Then, when he did that, because that was hisrole, peoplewere angry about that too.
“‘You don’t know what you do to people,’” Melisquietly mimicked several of his more powerful immortal brethren,adding a haughty scoff at the end. “Ha.” Several of the guard dogsraised their heads as Melis passed, following the rustle of hisfeathers and the sound of his voice. He waved them off to dreams ofmeaty bones and puddles big enough to splash in. “I do my work as Iam supposed to. They’re the ones too afraid to go after theywant—or to listen to why they will never receive it. War pesteringsomeone who doesn’t want him, perhaps because it means he willnever have to bare his soul. Storm-Bringer wants too many, toorecklessly, tearing open their chests to gaze at their heartswithout ever offering his in return. The moon wants to be eternallywooed. Fire and Invention wants to love and tells himself he has,heis, only to leave broken hearts behind him. TheFair-Shaped adores everyone but keeps her heart to herself—andthere is no reason for her not to, since unlike the others, she hasnever lured another with the idea of love. And when she rejectsthem, it’s even worse. As if she ever claimed to rule over hearts!She certainly did not, though she might fuck who she pleases. Theyknow this and yet when she doesn’t swoon for them, somehowIam the cruel one, the one who is blamed.Idid this to thembecause I am a foolish youth who doesn’t know anything aboutanything.”
“A king smart enough to keep his city free ofbattles and conflict, and apparently pretty enough to makestorytellers tremble with longing, cannot find someone to love him,and that ismyfault?” Melis continued to grumble, lettingNight hear him, not that Night cared about Melis’ guilt. “I cannotanswer every wish, and even when I try, people often remainunhappy.” Melis passed slowly through an empty throne room. “Thisking is certainly capable of great devotion. He honors the stingingwasp even as he is stung. He offers to the gods as he should, evento me, the smallest of them. If other humans do not love him, thatis their foolishness, not mine.”
Well, Melis would show them. The stories of thisking’s lonely heart and the prayers from his people on his behalfhad traveled the world, reaching deep beneath the mountains andhigh into the clouds. After one too many sneers from The Bringer ofBattles and knowing looks from The Fair-Shaped, Melis had stormedaway from her palace and fallen into the wind. The wind, guessingMelis’ decision before Melis had, had carried him here. So,fine. Melis would look upon the legendary king for himselfand determine if there was someone in the world to equal him.
Frankly, he was surprised that neitherStorm-Bringer nor The Fair-Shaped had taken King Antero to theirbeds. Antero was looking for more than a fuck, but that sort ofdetail wouldn’t bother a god. Not the elders, anyway. If Antero wasas perfect as the stories, his words, and his voice suggested, theelders might even fall for him… as much as the older gods couldfall for anyone but themselves.
They weren’t allowed to touch him.
The strength of Melis’ anger made him pause,although he hadn’t spoken it and no god should know his thoughtsunless Melis allowed them to. Nonetheless, he modified the tone ofhis thoughts as he continued on.
He’d meant that he wouldn’t let the elder godsnear the human king,notthat he meant to take Anterohimself. A ridiculous notion. If Antero were to seek happiness withan immortal, it would have to be a powerful one. Little thoughMelis was, he wouldn’t allow Antero to be used and discarded.Antero wanted a companion, a devoted, clever man to match wits withhim and share smiles with him, to sleep in his bed and talk withwhen either of them had a burden. He wanted the complement to thejagged edge of his soul.
