‘Are you sure I can’t persuade you to sing harmonies?’Back in the day, we’d enlisted Joanna to sing the harmony I wrote for the chorus.
I shake my head.‘Absolutely not.’
‘You know the whole ‘would you go back in time and shoot Hitler’ thing?’says Tadhg.‘Well, first I’d go back in time and shoot that teacher who told you you couldn’t sing before she had a chance to say it.Or I’d threaten her with a gun anyway.’
‘You should have made me sign that NDA,’ I say.‘I’m going straight to the tabloids.I can see the headlines now: ‘Saint Tadhg’s shocking gun threat!”
Tadhg laughs and then groans.‘God, those Saint Tadhg headlines.I do come across as a sanctimonious dickhead sometimes, don’t I?’
‘Meh, better a sanctimonious dickhead than just a dickhead.At least it shows you have principles,’ I say, and immediately regret it because, while things are definitely better between us, I’m pretty sure we’re not quite back to the point where we can do affectionate slagging.‘I’m joking!You’re not sanctimonious!Or a dickhead,’ I add hastily.
‘Oh, I’m definitely a sanctimonious dickhead sometimes,’ says Tadhg.‘But I try not to be.’
‘You clearly believe in stuff,’ I say.‘That’s not a bad thing.’And I mean it.
‘Eh, I suppose,’ he says.‘But I’m not sure what difference I make to the world.Unlike Aideen.My ex.I think she thought I was a bit of a dilettante sometimes.’
I’d forgotten about her.The brilliant human rights lawyer who presumably got all As in her Leaving.‘Are you still … How are things with her?’
He sighs.‘Ah, grand, I suppose.We’re sort of still in contact.The odd text, that sort of thing.’
‘Did it …’ I’m wary of overstepping boundaries.This is the first time we’ve talked about anything vaguely personal in our current lives.‘Did it all end badly?’
Tadhg shrugs.‘It just kind of … fizzled out.We were both always so busy and travelling all the time.And then when things calmed down and we eventually did spend more time together, well … I suppose we had less to say to each other than I thought we would.’
‘I’m sorry,’ I say.But I must confess that it does make me feel a bit, shamefully, happy to know that although I’m not a high-powered glamorous lawyer, Tadhg and I always had plenty to say to each other.
Then I remember Katie’s invitation.‘Katie says hi, by the way.’
His face lights up.‘Tell her I say hi back.God, I’d love to see Katie again.How is she?’
‘She’s very good,’ I say.‘She actually wondered if you’d like to come over on Saturday for dinner?’I’m struck by sudden nervousness.Maybe this is all a bit too much.No, it’s definitely too much.This is only my second day here and I’m inviting him over to my home.Why didn’t I tell Katie we should wait until next week?‘I’m staying with her at the moment and – obviously she’d understand if you’d find it too weird …’
‘Not at all!’Tadhg looks genuinely delighted.‘That’d be brilliant.’
‘Cool,’ I say.‘I’ll tell her.And Katie’s wife Jeanne will be there, of course.She’s lovely.And French,’ I add impressively.
‘Formidable,’ says Tadhg.‘How long have you been staying with them?’
‘Since last summer.It’s just temporary, though.’
‘Oh yeah?How come?’Tadhg looks genuinely interested.
I take a deep breath.I might as well tell him.‘My ex-fiancé and I split up last year.So I had to move out of our apartment.’
‘Ah,’ says Tadhg.‘I’m sorry.’He pauses.‘Or should I say congratulations?’
I laugh despite myself.‘A bit of both?He broke up with me.But I …’ The next words to come out of my mouth take me by surprise.‘I’m glad he did.’
And I realise I genuinely am.
We go back to playing our song, but once we’ve run through those two verses we hit a block again.We try various chords and melodies for a middle eight, but nothing we come up with is right.
I groan in frustration.‘Why isn’t this working?’
‘Let’s take a tea break,’ says Tadhg.
Once we’re in the kitchen and the kettle is on, Tadhg leans back against the counter and says, ‘D’you know what, I think we’re putting too much pressure on ourselves.’
