I roll my eyes at my thoughts. He hasn’t broken everything. His kids are still good, but I think that might be more thanks to Claudia than him.
Dr. Manning gets a pensive look on her face, then she turns to me. “Wren, can I speak to you alone in my office?”
She turns around without waiting for me to answer, and I follow her into the room.
When we get inside, I take the same seat I had the other day, and she closes the door. Instead of sitting in her chair, she stands behind it and leans forward with her elbows propped on the back. “I can imagine this isn’t a very welcome surprise. I know that a lot of the issues you and Griffin have been dealing with come from Griffin’s responses to his son’s decisions. It could be helpful for you to speak to him in a controlled setting.”
“I can never get away from that man,” I mumble under my breath.
She nods understandingly. “I can see that. Wouldn’t you like to finally rip the band-aid off that wound and air out all this hurt?”
“I’m starting to understand why people say that therapy is painful. I thought this process was supposed to feel good,” I complain.
“Who told you that bold-faced lie? Therapy is painful, but necessary. You have to push through that pain to rid yourself of the hold the past has on you. Now, is facing Liam something you’re ready for, or should we deal with this another time when you’re ready?” she asks me.
“It’s been ten years, if I don’t force myself, when am I going to be ready?” I ask.
She shrugs. “I can’t answer that for you.”
“Let’s do it. I might not ever be able to put Liam in my past completely, but I’d love not to have him occupying the dead center of my present. If you can do that, I’m in,” I reply.
Dr. Manning shakes her head. “I can’t do anything except guide you. I’m afraid you’re going to have to do the work.”
“I was afraid you were going to say that,” I grumble. “Let’s get this over with.”
I stay seated while Dr. Manning goes back to the lobby to bring in Griffin and Liam.
I’m not sure what I expect when they come in, but it isn’t absolute silence. After a few minutes, I crack. “Well, my original hope was we could talk about really dirty sex, and see if there was a way we could have more of it, but I’m thinking we should put a pin in that topic. Present company considered, someone else is going to have to get us started.”
Griffin jolts forward. “Liam, cover your ears,” he demands, as if he’s a toddler. “I don’t want to pass this up. We shouldabsolutely have more and dirtier sex. I’m open for anything except sharing you.”
“I’m so glad we’re in a therapist’s office so I can deal with my trauma in real time,” Liam complains.
“Okay, I see this family uses humor to deal with difficult topics. I have a suggestion, it will be less fun, but how about we talk about what kind of boundaries there are between the three of you?” Dr. Manning interjects.
Griffin and Liam stare at her blankly. “I think you might have to define that term for them,” I tell her.
“I know boundaries aren’t showing up to your dad’s marriage counseling uninvited,” Griffin says.
“Funny, you’d think boundaries would have stopped your dad from hooking up with your wife, but apparently not,” Liam snaps back.
“What is this, the therapy version of a dick measuring contest?” I ask.
“That answers my question that there are no boundaries here. That is definitely something that needs to be worked on. In our last session, I think Wren was starting to stumble on some things that should also be addressed,” Dr. Manning says.
She waits for a moment, probably for me to recall this apparent epiphany I was on the verge of a few days ago. However, I’m drawing a blank, so I sit silently until she supplies the answer.
“Wren, part of what we discussed the other day was about how you feel neglected by Griffin when he rushes to help Liam. We also talked about how you felt when Griffin thought you still had feelings for his son,” she reminds me.
“Come again?” Liam interrupts. He turns to face Griffin again. “You seriously thought, after everything I did to her, that she could possibly still have feelings for me?”
A muscle ticks in Griffin’s jaw. “It does sound stupid when you put it like that, but?—”
“Yes, Griffin?” Dr. Manning prods.
He takes a deep breath as if he’s deciding whether or not he should continue his thought. I can see by the determined set to his jaw that we really are ripping off band-aids. “I never thought I deserved Wren. I’m no one special. Shit, I’m nothing more than a blue-collar guy from a dysfunctional family. I’m rough and dirty, both physically and figuratively. I’m also selfish, because knowing all of that, I took her anyway. That doesn’t mean I don’t keep an eye out for the day that she decides she can do better.”
“Griff,” I sigh. “You worry about deserving me? I’m constantly worried that you, too, will think that there’s another woman out there who is better than me. For years, Liam showed me that I wasn’t enough, would never be enough. I couldn’t clean right or cook well enough. I was alone during birthdays, anniversaries, all the while, apparently, he was screwing the entire city of Harriston. My best friend didn’t value me enough not to get knocked up by my husband.”
