I stare at it long andhard.
She runs her finger over the boy. “You can tell what side of the family he takesafter.”
The answer is like a knife to my shredded heart.Hisfather’s.
36
Logan
Rage is an interesting thing.
The emotion can spin you out of control or make you so deathly focused, you swear you could fight like Neo inTheMatrix.
Right now, I’m so pissed, I might spitfire.
My legs can’t carry me fast enough up the stairs of Samantha’s building. When I get to the top of the stairwell, I go to the apartment across the hall from her place and pound on thedoor.
A petite older woman opens it. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know who else to call. I have to go to work tonight,and—”
“It’s okay, Carmen. This isn’t your fault. I’m glad you called me.” I’m kicking myself for not having her number in my phone to begin with. If I had known she babysat for Zach, I hope I would’ve thought to getit.
Zach hops off the couch and comes racing into myarms.
“Hey, buddy. You doing okay?” It takes everything in me to calm the hell down. Seeing that he’s safe helps. I give him a big hug and let out a sigh ofrelief.
Zach nods, but it’s obvious he’s been crying. “Hey,Logan.”
Carmen motions for us to sit, and I take Zach over to her kitchen table and sit next to him before I turn toher.
“Tell me what happenedagain.”
Her hands twist together. “Mr. Logan, Samantha asked me to watch Zach on Monday morning for a few hours, and by late afternoon, I started to get worried, wondering where she was. By night time, I had Zach sleep on the couch and hoped she would come home after her job. It was strange because she wasn’t returning my messages. And then yesterday morning, when I took out the trash, I saw her run to her car. I was shocked to see her. She acted like nothing was wrong, even though she had left her son with me and hadn’t stopped by to check on him oranything.”
What the fuck? I’m about to blow a gasket, but I take a deepbreath.
“And you’re sure you didn’t maybe misunderstand? Is it possible she wanted him to stay with you for a couple of nights?” Although the fact that Samantha dumped him here and hasn’t checked in with Carmen this whole time has me seeing a haze ofred.
“Zach has never stayed overnight with me before.” She turns to the kid. With a sad smile, she pats his hand. “Butmijo, you know you’re always welcome here, right? I was just worried about your mama, and I was afraid I’d miss worktonight.”
He nods, big tears welling in hiseyes.
I tug him into my arms and give him another hug. “Hey, bud, everything’s okay. We’ll get this sorted out. How about you go and play for a few minutes while Carmen and I finish chatting? You hungry? Maybe we can grab some burgers afterthis.”
That makes him smile. Once he’s settled in front of the television, I turn back to Carmen and lower my voice. “How much does Samantha pay you for childcare? I want to be sure to settle her bill.” I didn’t miss the tremble in Carmen’s voice when she talked about missingwork.
But she shakes her head, pink rising in her cheeks. “I’ve never asked for money. She’s a singlemom.”
There’s a question in her eyes. “Yeah, she’s a single mother. But I give her more than enough to pay for childcare if she needsit.”
In fact, I’ve offered to take Zach for a few days to give her a break, and she’s never taken me up on it. Samantha, though emotional at times, seemed like a good mom. She was flexible with me at the beginning, and I was afraid to rock the boat and talk about getting more time to see the kid. Sure, that might’ve pushed me to finally tell everyone in my family what’s going on, but I didn’t want her thinking she had to raise a child byherself.
Maybe that’s what I’ve fucking needed—to face the reality of thesituation.
I scrub my face, so tired of dealing with this by myself. Who am I kidding? I need people in my life to know what’s going on even if it hurts them. More than anyone, I’m desperate to tell Joey, desperate to finally have this out in theopen.
Grabbing my phone, I try calling Samantha again, irritated as fuck when I get voicemail. So I rifle off several more messages, wishing I had my brother by my side and sorry as hell I’m gonna have to burst his bubble before thewedding.
And then I call ourlawyer.
