Even the note in which he informed me of the special licence was haughty, and so like him.
Elizabeth smiled at the thought.
He would be discreet during possible infidelities and careful not to father children outside of their marriage; he'd almost told her as much himself.
Then she thought about her father. Why hadn't he been more careful about not getting her mother with child?
She jerked herself away from the thought and went to the washbasin to prepare for the day. There was so much to be done. First, she’d order a bath.
*
When her brother and her future husband showed up at her door at exactly 8 o’clock that morning, accompanied by Mister Arthur Pratt and a still sleepy priest, Elizabeth’s first impulsewas to tease Talbot and ask him whether he was unable to convince the Archbishop to perform the ceremony, but then she froze.
He probably would have,she thought.He’d have a grand, duke-worthy wedding in St. George’s, led by the Archbishop, with a bride like Lady Helena at his side.
Elizabeth felt hot shame colouring her cheeks as she remembered what she had overheard him say about her. She didn’t know what she was ashamed of – her parents? Her upbringing? In a way, she knew that she had done nothing that merited shame, and yet there it was, plain as day to her, and probably everyone around her.Unworthy.
She glanced at her brother for the first time since the men had entered the room she was in, only to find his gaze already on her, looking sad and soft somehow. She averted her eyes, remembering how his accusations had cut her the night before. She’d never known pain like it. Perhaps it hurt more because she had tried so hard.
She had always believed her father had dealt her the biggest blow of her life, but her brother, her second chance at a family, had managed to outdo him. For him, she wasn’t a sister, but an easy woman’s daughter who was incapable of acting differently from her mother.
The very mother who, to Elizabeth’s absolute mortification, had to be introduced to her future husband asMissWilliams. She was now sitting next to her, looking happy and proud, and, to Lizzie, absolutely delusional about what this wedding was.
Mary had taken it upon herself to handle the preparations with the rest of the household, as well as retrieve Lizzie's almostfinished dress from Miss Euphemia’s yesterday. This morning, it was miraculously completed and was waiting for Elizabeth in her dressing room.
Mary had given her a tight hug and done a beautiful job with her hair, but Elizabeth couldn’t appreciate any of it. The dress she was wearing had been ordered for her wedding to another man. The banns for which would still be read the following Sunday unless someone remembered to cancel them.
This was not the entrance into peaceful, respectable living that Elizabeth had been working towards. She could only imagine the gossip that had already started spreading about her. Her nose started stinging, and she took deep breaths to stop herself from crying.
Nicholas sat down next to her.
“I know this isn’t what you had planned for your wedding day, but it is for the best,” he told her.
Elizabeth bit her own teeth. She didn’t want to look at him. She suddenly remembered that the house they were sitting in had belonged to his mistress, and she was hit by a wave of revulsion.
Perhaps he ought to examine whether he is similar to our father after all,she thought bitterly.
“Lizzie,” he tried again, his tone imploring this time. “I-”
“We're ready, Hawkins,” her future husband interrupted, glancing between the two of them with a frown.
Elizabeth silently thanked God that Talbot hadn’t witnessed Nicholas’s rebuke of her last night. What would one think of a woman whose own brother insulted her like that?
She stood up and accepted the hand Talbot had offered her. She had yet to say anything. She glanced at Talbot’s face and hisstill somewhat swollen lip. He didn’t seem angry or foxed. He looked… calm.
She nodded at Robert, who was standing at the door of the drawing room, and he went to fetch the others. When she saw Mister Ed, Mrs. Barlow, Jane, and Mary filing into the room, she couldn’t help but start crying.
The priest recited the familiar words, asked them to vow to love and honour each other, and to forsake all others, but Elizabeth was hearing none of it. She never let a sob escape past her lips, but her vision was clouded by the tears. The whole front of her dress was wet. Talbot was squeezing her hand painfully hard, but she couldn’t stop the shaking of her shoulders.
She did manage to utterI willin the required place, and after the witnesses signed, was relieved to hear that her luggage was already in Talbot’s carriage and that they would be leaving for Norwich posthaste. The emotional strain combined with the sleepless night had caught up to her, and now that the deed was done, she was close to collapsing.
Her people were hugging her and wishing her well, and saying goodbye. Her husband (her astonishment at that fact briefly managed to break through the thick fog in her mind) helped her into the carriage, where she promptly divested herself of her bonnet and her gloves, and fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.
Chapter 18
Elizabeth had no idea how long she’d slept. Her eyes were still closed, but she was now aware of the jostling of the carriage, the daylight entering it through the windows despite the drawn curtains, and a warm body she'd apparently been sleeping on. She scrambled to sit up.?
“Good morning, Your Grace,” her husband said with a smile she couldn’t quite decipher.
