“If you don’t have to go, and have nothing else to do…”
I shake my head. “Absolutely nothing.”
“Okay, then. Maybe I can help.”
Maybe.
Or maybe you could let me kiss you again. Or maybe I could run my fingers through your unruly hair, tugging at them, just to hear you groan into my mouth.
I swallow down those thoughts, the madness driving them, and smile.
I smile at my fake boyfriend.
“I’d love that.”
* * *
WHEN MILA LEAVES US tohave a shower, I take advantage of the time alone to ask Sean questions, while he helps me make lunch.
“Is she feeling better?”
Sean sighs. “She said she only skipped a day and a half, then took another pill right after breakfast.”
“Good.”
“She was still fairly controlled, thankfully. I don’t think she actually wanted to do anything, it’s just that she…” He sighs again, heavier this time. “Sorry about last night. And everything else.”
“You have nothing to be sorry for.”
“I warned you my family was a mess.”
I stand in silence for a moment, then try to dig deeper.
“Your family, Sean?”
He smiles sadly. “I thought you might realise that there’s only me and Mila.”
“Has it been just the two of you for a while?”
He nods, chopping the vegetables he’s arranged on the counter.
I thought I’d make stuffed, roasted vegetables and chicken with peppers. They both seemed starving and accepted happily.
I like cooking for people. I cook for people every day at the restaurant, but I never get the chance to cook for anyone in particular – for the people who make up my life, even if they’re only part of it for a little while.
“I’m all she has.”
“Then why did you lie about Christmas?”
“I didn’t want you to know. We didn’t know each other, really – I knew nothing about you. I didn’t know whether I could trust you.”
He used the past tense. And he’s a professor. There’s no chance that was a coincidence.
“I wanted to tell you as soon as I’d worked out you weren’t a complete dick,” he says, smiling at me. I smile back. “But then I thought it might be simpler to just keep everything at a distance. For me and for her.”
“I get it, you know. You take care of her – you were trying to protect her.”
“I try. But I’m really, really bad at it.”
