I’m gasoline.
I’ll tell them the truth, but I won’t apologize for what I am. Ryder is right.
Yet the doubts return as I finish work and walk slowly back home. I’ve had minimal interaction with other humans today and I’m trying to keep it that way. I’m not good company as I wallow in my misery, drinking instant hot chocolate and leaving crumbs of cookies everywhere.
I’m already missing them. The thought of not having the three alphas in my life is a heavy blow. A near mortal blow. I’m only starting to feel its edge now, the extent of the pain it will cause me.
I’ve gone and fallen for the three of them, and now what the hell will I do? Like an idiot, I opened my heart and now it’s hooked on them. Leaving them will tear it apart.
I’m gasping by the time I make it home, and then I close my door and throw myself onto my sofa.
What am I gonna do?
I should talk to them. What Ryder said… Wait. I sit up, scrubbing at my wet cheeks. He didn’t say he’d leave me. What did he say? He said all those positive, nice things. My mind twisted them instantly into pacifying lies so he could backtrack without feeling guilt, but that wasn’t what he said, was it?
After chewing on my cuticles for a couple of hours, I take the plunge and text him.
‘Ryder.’ I stare down at his name on my phone screen. ‘Did you mean it?’
His reply comes instantly, as if he were waiting for me to write. ‘I meant every word, Candy girl. Which part are you asking about?’
‘That you are still here. For me.’
No reply comes back and the despair returns.
See? I was right. He didn’t mean those things. He’s kind and only wanted to make me feel better. He’ll forgive me, I bet. They all will. Forgive and forget. Move on.
Falling back on the sofa, I grab my favorite cushion and press it to my chest. It’s probably time for me to get that cat or dog and abandon the world for a while. Wallow in my misery. Start to smoke herbs and see visions. Join an exotic monastery and do yoga every morning.
Only if it’s not too early, though.
And after that?—
My doorbell rings, startling me. I sit up, my heart hammering. Who could that be? I check my phone again but the only new messages that have appeared are from Sawyer, asking if I’m okay.
Damn.
Is that him? Could Sawyer have come with his pack to check on me as they had done in the past? Am I ready to face them, no matter how wonderful they are?
I want my mates. My alphas. Nobody else.
Padding quietly to the door, I rise on tiptoe and peer through the peephole, biting my already tortured lower lip…
And find all three of them standing outside my door.
My three alphas.
Not Sawyer. Not his pack.
My alphas.
My chest too tight, I step back. What are they doing here? I’m not… not ready, not sane, not…
I throw the door wide open. “You!” I whisper.
My hair is a nest, my clothes rumpled, my cheeks tear-stained, my lip bitten through. I look like a real mess.
And there they are, gorgeous and dressed to the nines, their arms full of flowers.
