“We’ve already been through this. I appreciate you offerin’ me the spare room at your house, but it ain’t happenin’. We see each other enough at the firehouse; we don’t need to live together too. Contrary to what you’d like to believe, I don’t want to see you every second of the day. It’s nice of you to offer, but no.”
Remi barks out a laugh. “Okay, first of all, Cap, that’s a lie. I’m the light in your life. Seein’ me brightens your whole day. I know it, you know it. But it’s okay, we can go with your story to avoid makin’ everyone on the crew jealous.”
“Okay, whatever.” I heave an exaggerated sigh, feigning annoyance that isn’t there. Remi sometimes comes off like an overly excited puppy that can’t sit still. One that can’t help but stick his nose where it doesn’t belong, and while it can be a bit much at times, I know it comes from a good place. “Regardless, my answer is no, but thank you. Now, if that’s all, I’m?—”
“Pipe down, old man.” He chuckles, and it has the faintest smile pulling at the corner of my mouth. “It’s not my house. It’s one of the fully furnished cabins on the Moore’s ranch. They rent them out and have a few available. I talked to Hollis the other day when we were there for that fire. He just let me know that Gentry agreed to rent it to you for as long as you need.”
I’m silent for a moment.
A cabin on the Moore Family Ranch.
No.
Nope.
I don’t care how badly I want out of here,thatcan’t be my solution.
“That won’t be necessary,” I mutter.
“Of course it’s necessary,” he drawls. “Where else are ya gonna go?”
“Somethin’ will come up soon. I’m not gonna take handouts from people I barely know.”
Remi’s quiet for a moment. “What are you talkin’ about? It’s not a handout, and they aren’t people you barely know. It’s Hollis and his family. And it’s a hell of a lot nicer than your current digs. Have you seen how nice their property is?”
Even though I shouldn’t, I find myself considering it. Yeah, being there means I’m closer to Hollis, but that doesn’t change anything. He still doesn’t know who I am on the app, and it’s not like I’d make a move. Yet something is still holding me back that has nothing to do with Hollis and how his flirting sets my body on fire.
“That’s very thoughtful of you to do, Remi. Thank you.” Some would call it pride, a therapist would probably call it a trauma response, but I’ve rarely ever asked for help. If it’s not something I can achieve on my own, then it’s not for me. Or at least, that was my thought before. But now… Well, the urge to turn away from this handout is still front and center, but now the logical part of my brain acknowledges what a great opportunity this would be, especially considering the alternative is more of this glorified dorm living. Maybe it’s time to put away the pride, or whatever it may be. Tuck my tail between my legs and take what I can get. “Can I think on it and get back to you in a day or two?”
Okay, old habits die hard, clearly.
“What?” Remi balks, huffing out a small chuckle. “No way, Cap.”
My brows furrow as I wonder if I heard him right. “Excuse me?”
“Listen, no disrespect or judgement, but you’ve been livin’ at the firehouse for weeks. There’s nothin’ to think about. I’m not lettin’ you be stubborn this time. I’ve taken care of everythin’, and Hollis and I are goin’ to help you move all your stuff next week.”
My stomach drops. I breathe a harsh breath through my nose. “Remington…”
“Don’t you dare full name me.” He laughs. “I think the words you’re lookin’ for are, ‘thank you, Remi. I’m so lucky to have such a thoughtful, caring, and handsome friend like you.’”
“I’m hangin’ up now,” I groan.
“Next week, Cap. Be ready,” he says in a rush before ending the call.
Phone in hand, my chest feels cut open and exposed while emotion clogs my throat. It’s a terrible combination, and it triggers some sort of fight-or-flight mode. After I force myself to take a few deep breaths to calm my racing heart, I unlock the phone and pull up Remi’s text thread.
Me: Thank you.
No matter how uncomfortable all of this is, Remi didn’t have to do any of it. He doesn’t owe me a damn thing. Knowing he went out of his way to make this happen for me means a lot, and I need him to know I appreciate it. Appreciate him.
Remembering the message I didn’t respond to, I open the app again. It’s late, so there’s a chance Hollis won’t evenrespond tonight, but maybe that’s for the best. It’ll give me time to answer the question and prepare for whatever one he comes back with tomorrow.
FireInMyVeins: You’re right, in that I’m relatively fresh out of a relationship that began long before dating apps were even a thought. It’s not something I’ve shared with many people, but in favor of abiding by rule #23, I’ll be honest and admit it almost feels easier sharing something personal with you, since you don’t know who I am.
I close out of the app after hitting send, plugging my phone in and setting it on the nightstand. It’s time to go to bed before my mind has a chance to overthink the whole evening.
I’m going to be fine, even if it doesn’t feel that way right now.
