“Have you and your sister always been close?” Finn asks as we make our way back to the barn. The question takes me by surprise because he’s kept the conversation to a minimum all morning. He doesn’t strike me as a chit-chat type of guy.
Nodding, I reply with, “Yeah, pretty much.”
It’s the simple answer. And it’s mostly the truth.
He doesn’t need to know about the resentment I used to feel toward my twin because of the years of boys picking her over me. And he doesn’t need to know about how going to Oregon for college was the only way I was able to let go of that resentment. Putting miles between us, making it so nobody could pick her over me anymore.
It’s something I’ve never admitted out loud, not even to Violet. It’s something I used to feel deep shame over, because I know that Vi never meant to hurt me. She never purposely picked guys I liked, never maliciously flaunted her easy, widely accepted hetero relationships in front of my face. Growing upopenly gay in the south hasn’t always been easy. My family and friends have always been more than supportive, but it made finding relationships a heck of a lot harder for me than it was for my sister.
Distance and therapy have helped me see that I’m not a horrible person for feeling resentment toward my twin sister, but she’s also not a horrible person for having things come easier to her either. It’s not her fault that she’s straight, just like it’s not my fault that I’m gay.
But that’s entirely too deep of a conversation to have with my new boss, especially before I’ve even started my first official day of work. Not that I ever plan on sharing any of that with him anyway. It’s a part of me that I’ve never told anyone, nor do I plan to.
Chapter 7
Finn
Jesus Christ.
Taking off my hat, I wipe the sweat from my brow with the back of my hand, watching the scene unfold in front of me. “How the hell are ya from Texas and can’t mount a horse?”
“Maybe because I’m not from— Ahh, crap! What’s he doing?”
I roll my eyes, digging the toe of my boot into the dirt. “Sheis walkin’,” I deadpan. “Relax, would ya?”
Ash lets out a high-pitched laugh that sounds like it’s edging on hysteria as he wraps his arms around Chessy’s neck, practically laying on her. “Easy for you to say.”
“Christ, my four-year-old is better at this than you are,” I mutter under my breath. “Sit up properly and hold on to the reins. Ya look like you’re ’bout to take a nap on her.”
He doesn’t sit up or grab the reins.
He’s frozen in place, and I’m suddenly realizing what I thought was going to be a quick lesson in horseback riding is now going to turn into a full-day event, and the last inch of patience I had vanishes.
Next time, I’m making this a requirement for the job.
Fuck, even thinking that there will a “next time” has my eye twitching and my blood pressure rising.
“Do I really have to learn this?” Ash asks, the sweat along his brow glistening under the late morning Texas sun. “Surely, I can walk to where we need to go on the property.”
“Yes.” I fold my arms over my chest, stance wide as I rethink my decision to hire Ash. “It’s a basic skill everybody should know how to do. What if you find yourself stranded, and a horse is the only option?”
His eyes narrow as he asks, “In what situation would I be in where horseback was my only option?”
He sure asks a lot of fucking questions. In two long strides, I’m in front of Ash and Chessy. “Can you just stop with the questions and sit up?”
His head snaps to the side, widened gaze meeting mine, and it’s not until right now that I realize my hand is on the small of his back. I rip my hand away, like the touch burned me, but thankfully he listens, sliding into the proper position.
“Take the reins,” I tell him, handing them to him. “Now, wait here.”
“What?” he asks, panic in his tone. “Where are you going?”
“To get my horse.”
This ought to be interesting.
After I climb onto my mare, I set off in the direction of the walking trail. I go slow so Ash can keep up. He’s so tense, you’d think he was on the back of a gator or something. “You goin’ to be alright?” I ask him.
Huffing out a laugh that sounds more frantic than anything, Ash nods. “Yeah. Totally fine. I’m cool.”
