“Damn right, I did. My hand is still sore thanks to Trombley’s face running into it, thank you very much.”
I held up a hand that boasted nicks and scratches from the fight.
“But that had nothing to do with winning the game,” he said. “You told me you did it because we’re teammates.”
“I did do it because we’re teammates.”
“Then it wasn’t really about winning the game.”
“Look, weren’t you the guy that wanted to call off the bet completely?”
“Yeah. I even gave you the chance to make this easy, but you had to act like a stubborn hothead. Figures.”
Now I felt tense all over, like he’d put his combination lock on my locker all over again. Don’t buy his well-mannered farm boy bullshit. The kid’s got nerve like you wouldn’t believe. Despite it all, I didn’t regret going to the hospital or driving him home. It was the least I could do for my man?—
My man…
Okay, all right, fine. I’ll rock that one because I know you want to hear about it. Ever since I’d beat Trevor Trombley’s brains in, I’ve thought of Erik De Ruiter as “my man.” I didn’t do it on purpose, and I can’t stop it. If I had it my way, my thoughts about him, especially those two little words, never would’ve entered my mind. I’m only telling you about it now because I guess I can’t deny it. You already know that seeing him take thatugly ass hit struck me like a hook to the gut. I’ll come clean about that much.
And I can’t deny looking at him for a little too long when I visited his hospital room. Worse, I kept stealing little glances at him in the car.
Even now, I lost myself in his blue eyes again. Oh yeah, he drove me nuts, but also made me feel helpless. I would normally dismiss the craziness, but this was way too much. You know why? Because he was hot. Not just handsome, but hot.
That’s all I’m going to say about that, at least for right now. I felt unprepared—and unwilling—to take those thoughts any farther. Besides, I could do something about it. If I ordered those thoughts out of my mind, they would have to leave.
Problem solved.
“You having a daydream or something?” Erik asked.
I snapped to attention as if suddenly awakened from a dream.
“Huh?”
“You looked like you were completely lost in space just now. What happened to your focus?”
I shook my head, clawing my way back to reality.
He noticed. Oh my God, he fucking noticed me looking at him. Trevor Trombley hearing me call Erikmy manwas one thing. I’d lost my head and was about to smash his face in. I didn’t know what I was saying. I could deny it up and down if I wanted to. But this wasn’t the heat of the moment. What excuse did I have?
I mostly felt calm, though. In a weird way, stealing those glances made me feel good. I just couldn’t let myself get carried away with it.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I just lost myself thinking about how impossible some people can be.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about you, bro. You shouldn’t even be here.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’ve got a concussion and won’t play in the second exhibition game. You’ll be lucky to be ready for the season opener.”
“I’m a quick healer.”
“That’s great, I guess.”
I looked away from him, the smartest move I could make given the circumstances.
“You just don’t want me here.”
