The steps ascended along the outside of the lighthouse. A gorgeous view that spanned from the waves crashing against the structure all the way out to the distance of the hazy horizon in front of us. Though it was cold and overcast, there were breakthroughs of light and color in the early hours of the evening sky.
The only downside to this stairway was the fact that you weren’t just looking at the view, you were a part of it. It was only tolerable in the summer. The mist felt good when there was heat slicking your skin, but it felt like sharp needles of cold when it was just a few days before Thanksgiving.
Harper must have agreed, because when we reached the top he turned on me. “I’m sorry for everything I’ve ever done to you. Please don’t kill me at your creepy frozen lighthouse.”
I sputtered a laugh. He was only kidding, because at the same time, he wrapped me up in a hug. Less for affection and more for warmth I realized as he shivered against me. I couldn’t help it as I rose to my toes and kissed him on the lips. Mine were already numbing from the cold air, but our kiss was warm enough to heat me up.
He hummed.
I freaking loved it when he hummed at my touch. Like I was a tasty treat he’d been waiting all day to consume. Like I was a reward of some kind.
I realized then that I wanted to make him hum like that for as long as I was able. Bring him pleasure not only from sex but in life too. I hoped this view would at least help.
Sobered, Harper kept his arms around my shoulders, his body close to mine, his gaze on my gaze as he spoke calmly. “Why are we here?”
“I wanted to show you this place.”
“Huh.” He looked out along the horizon, waves filling in the soft silence that fell between us. “Why?”
“Well,” I pulled him along the circle of the lighthouse. “You’re not from here. So you wouldn’t know where we are. But you seem kind of down today. So I thought it might be a good place for you to think and clear your mind. With or without me.”
“With you,” he said with no hesitation. “One hundred percent.”
I felt myself melt into his words. “Okay. Let’s sit then.”
We did. Setting up the chairs and sharing a blanket, we sat quietly watching the earth move.
Water. Clouds. Time, all moving around us and doing their own thing. I always found peace up here, thinking about how the world still went round even when I thought the worst thing to ever happen had occurred. Time would not stand still and soon enough, I would be able to try again.
I wondered what the view made Harper think of as he sat with me in companionable silence.
Apparently, it wasn’t what I thought he’d be thinking. “Alright. I think I’m ready to be sacrificed to the snow demons now.”
“You’re really not going to leave it alone are you?” I scoffed.
He winced. “Sorry. I get anxious when I’m upset. I usually can’t sit still.”
I smiled. As always, we were opposites. “I freeze when I’mupset. It’s like all my energy instantly drains from my body. All my weight goes to my feet and I can’t move.”
“And do you come out here when that happens?”
“I do,” I nodded. “Here and other places like it. This is one of my favorites, though.”
“You have a favorite lighthouse?” he asked, confused.
“Why does that surprise you?”
“It doesn’t seem like your kind of thing.”
I couldn’t fight my smile as my eyes drifted out over the waves to the steady form deep in the haze. “It’s not. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love Seaside to death. I want to be here forever, but I’m not big on sand in my shoes and the crabs sort of creep me out.”
He laughed, imploring the use of ‘pobrecita’–his new favorite Spanish word. “Why do you like it out here, then? It doesn’t get more Seaside than this.”
“Because of my sister,” I said, looking to the waves again.
“Melissa?” I eyed him curiously, wondering if I was so transparent. I must have shown it on my face because he added. “You talk about all your family, but you’re different when you talk about her. Almost, solemn.”
“Yeah,” I swallowed, my mind going to the way she’d been avoiding me lately. Brushing me off and disappearing whenever I appeared. “That’s probably because I’m pretty conflicted when I think about her these days.”
