It wrecks me with how much this hug hurts and heals at the same time. I bury my face in her shoulder, just for a moment, and let myself feel.
The grief. The gratitude. The echo of love I thought I’d ruined.
“I’m so proud of you,” she whispers into my chest, giving it a small kiss while wrapping her arms around me tighter, andeven though she is saying the words, it also feels like a message from my dad.
After my dad’s casket is laid into the ground, everyone decides to meet back at my grandmother’s house. Some of her neighbors show up with cooked meals and condolences. There isn’t sorrow in her house, only joy and peace.
Everyone is at the dining table, eating and laughing, as we find healing together. While my friends are being filled in on some of the stories from the previous weekend, Olivia excuses herself for a moment and has been gone quite a while.
“I’ll be right back,” I announce before wandering down the hallway until I find Olivia standing in the bedroom we shared together just days ago—when fake dating had felt simpler than facing what was real.
She’s standing by the bed, arms wrapped around herself. I take a step toward her once I see the slight tremble in her shoulders. As she turns at the sound of the door, her eyes shine with tears she hasn’t let fall, and it completely wrecks me.
“Hey,” I say and lean against the doorframe, not sure if I should come any closer.
She doesn’t answer me. Instead, she quickly blinks her eyes, attempting to hide her emotions. I can’t take the distance any longer as I make my way across the room until I’m in front of her.
There’s a moment where I wonder if she wants me to be here, but then she leans into me, and that’s all it takes. I wrap my arms around her and rest my chin on her shoulder. She sinks into me like she’s exhausted from standing on her own.
“Is everything okay?” I finally ask, moving back so I can lookdown at her.
“No.” Her bottom lip quivers with the confession.
“What can I do?”
My chest aches at the sheen in her eyes as they drop down to the floor. She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth, attempting to stop the quivering. I place my hand onto the side of her face and encourage her to look up at me.
“Forgive me,” she says softly, her green eyes lifting to mine.
“Forgive you? For what?” I ask, completely dumbfounded. “Liv, you did nothing wrong.”
“But I did,” she admits, and I move back an inch so I can see her better. “I freaked out when you told me the truth, and I pushed you away.”
My hand slides down to her jaw. “I deserved it, and I understand that you were just protecting yourself.”
Her brows pull together. “But you were right when you said that choosing each other should be easy. I didn’t choose you then. I chose to hang onto my pain and anger. That wasn’t fair to you, not after you were able to bravely forgive your dad for the awful things he’s done to you. If you can do that, I can overcome the mistakes from our youth.”
I lean closer to her, using my free hand to cup her face. “Even though I wish I could change things, I understand that those mistakes had to happen to lead us right here.”
Tears fall from her eyes as she gives me a wide smile.
“Let's finally put this behind us. I never want to waste another second not loving you.”
Olivia nods her head. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
“Okay, then, I forgive you. Do you forgive me?”
“Yes,” she says in a breathy voice, her eyes dipping to my lips for a second.
“There, it’s done.”
She giggles, and I lean in and place a small peck to the tip of her nose. “It’s that easy, huh?”
“Choosing you is the easiest thing I’ve ever done.”
Olivia’s smile falls from her face, and before she can sayanything more, I kiss her. I don’t care what either of us didn’t say in the past. I only care about what we tell each other now. Our kiss is slow and tender. It’sI'm sorry. I choose you. I missed you. I love you.
It’s acceptance. It’s our future.
