Raine reaches up and places a hand against my cheek. “I know how important Pops is to you. I think you should stay. We’ll figure something out together.”
Growing up with a selfish father who was abusive helped me to appreciate just how good of a man my Pops is. He stepped into my life and did everything he could to heal my heart. Pops is my hero. If anyone shined the light of Jesus, it was him. He doesn’t deserve to walk through this grief alone.
Watching him have to say goodbye to the love of his life has beenthehardest thing I’ve ever been through in my nineteen years of life. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself knowing that I abandoned him when he needed me the most. I owe him more than that.
But to hinder Raine’s plans of freedom…that hurts just as bad, if not more. Because I know if Davis continues to control her—and he’s made it clear that he will—she won’t be happy. And what if she resents me afterward?
“I don’t want to change our plans,” I admit, leaning my cheek into her palm.
“I know that. But right now, you need to be here for Pops,” she whispers as a large tear rolls down her cheek. I can’t watch her cry, so I look down at our hands. “So, we'll stay, and we can reevaluate after six months and go from there. I want to be able to help Pops too, if I can.”
My head snaps up to look at her. “What?” My nose crinkles in confusion.
“I’m not leaving you, Ryland.” Raine’s eyes soften to warm, bright puddles of blue.
“You have to. There’s no way that I’m going to let you stay and suffer any longer. You have to go. We can try long distance for a while until I get Pops back on his feet and feel comfortable leaving,” I plead and wipe away the wetness from her cheeks.
“Long distance will suck,” she says softly and moves her focus onto a boat that’s drifting in the distance. The waves find their way toward us, crashing against the pedal boat, rocking us back and forth, much like how life is treating us at this moment. “I don’t want to be miles away from you.”
“I know. I don’t want that either,” I add, taking both of her hands into mine. “But I refuse to let you?—”
“No. That isn’t going to work with me because wherever you are, I’m going to be. Wherever you decide to go, I will follow. I love you, Ryland, with every fiber of my being, and I can’t imagine a life where you aren’t a part of it. And not just on the weekends but daily! I’m done with limiting my time with you. I want every second of every day to be consumed by you. That’s what I want. That’s what I need in my life. I know you want me to be free, but it would be a life of prison without you. Don’t you get that?”
Raine fists my shirt in her hands and pulls me forward until our lips touch, hands against skin and bodies fusing together. Kissing her feels like lighting a match and watching it go up in flames. Raine’s hand slides into the collar of my shirt, and my eyes roll to the back of my head.
She sighs against my mouth, and I take advantage, kissingher harder, until we’re both gasping. I let my mouth slide along her collarbone. Not kissing, but just feeling, memorizing. Because for some reason this feels like it could be our last kiss, and I don’t want to waste it. Raine’s breath comes in loud, panting gasps, and when I look up at her, I don’t think I have the strength to let her go.
Here she is, willing to sacrifice her dreams and freedom because of how much she loves me. And here I am, trying to convince myself that maybe if she stays, everything will work out. I don’t know how I ended up being so selfish.
“We’re going to miss the party,” I say breathlessly, desperately wanting to cling to anything other than the uncertainty of our future together. “Let's enjoy the rest of the night, and we can talk about this tomorrow,” I add, giving her hand an encouraging squeeze.
A cool breeze blows around us, pushing her hair across her face, hiding her expression from me. I wish I could crawl inside her mind at this moment, to know how she feels, to see what she sees. To understand better.
“Alright,” she replies.
A half hour later, I drive us to the location of our graduation party. The unanswered questions vibrate between us, eating me alive, but we both stay silent. Raine and I don’t do parties, but I begged her to go to this one with me. I wanted one last night to enjoy each other, to not allow the unknown about our future to weigh so heavily on our shoulders, and to soak in these last moments with our graduating class.
I shut my door and jog around my car to open the door for Raine. Before I allow her to move past me, I lean in and give her a kiss. Her breath hitches, and I feel her tighten under my grip.
“Let's forget about the future for a bit and just enjoy our night together, okay?” I practically beg her before we link our hands together and walk toward the crowd.
The graduation party is held at a beachy area by the lake. A large bonfire blazes light around a group of what looks to be about thirty of our classmates. Music is blasting from a speaker that sits next to two kegs and several coolers that I’m sure are packed full of alcohol. How do they expect the cops not to show up tonight?
I find Luke, and he wraps an arm around my shoulders. The scent of alcohol punches me in the face as he shouts, “The party can officially begin, boys!”
“It smells like the party has already started.” I wave a hand in front of my face and laugh at my friend as he trips over a log and falls onto his back. I reach a hand out and help him up, and that’s when I see it—a shiny black bruise under his right eye.
Raine sees it too. She inhales and reaches up to touch his eye. “Luke, what happened?”
He shoves her off him lightly, and his once chipper mood quickly dissolves into disgust. “It’s nothing for you to worry about.”
“It’s not nothing!” she argues.
“Just leave it, okay? I don’t feel like hashing it with you tonight.” Hurt washes over her face, and as much as I love my best friend, I could give him a second black eye for treating her so harshly. Raine shakes her head, her eyes finding mine for a second before she mumbles something about finding Olivia and stomps away.
“What’s your deal, man?” I hiss and tug him to the side, away from the rowdy group.
“Who do you think?”
