We all move out of the way and allow Luke to slip past us. Olivia swings around to face me, her eyes silently asking a question, and I jerk my chin toward the door behind her. “Go. Make sure he’s okay,” I assure her.
Before she leaves, she gives Ryland a scolding look, scrunches her nose, and pokes his chest. “Me and you are not done. Okay?”
He holds up his hands in defeat, a hint of fear etched in his expression—and for good reason. Everyone knows you don’t mess with Olivia, and he’s in for an earful from her. Once Olivia’s gone, the stairwell falls completely silent. It’s so quiet I can hear each breath escaping Ryland’s lungs.
“You were quick to forgive him,” he proclaims, leaning against the wall.
“Well, I learned from the best,” I say. “It’s not right for me to want him to suffer too. I didn’t understand that before.” I exhale, wishing I felt better after forgiving Luke, but the same dread stays firm in its place insideme.
“I get that. I made some sacrifices in order to take the pressure off Zane and Mom when Dad had his episodes. It doesn’t mean that what Davis is doing is okay. He shouldn’t be allowed to get away with it,” he shouts, swearing under his breath.
My mouth drops as the swear leaves his lips, and he apologizes. I know he’s angry at the injustice of it all. He hates that I’m learning firsthand how his father was once to him. However, Ryland’s dad sounds much worse. I wish I could erase the scars I know his father left behind.
“Are you okay?” Ryland asks after a moment of silence. I meet his gaze and notice a hint of heat behind their hazel color.
“I will be,” I say breathlessly and give him a small smile.
There is something buzzing between us, making me feel unsteady. I shift on my feet nervously, twirling the strings from my hoodie around my fingertips, and ask, “So you punched Luke?”
It's not really a question because we both know the answer, but I need to say something to help root me here, by the stairwell, instead of closing the distance between us. Ryland’s hands are in his pockets, and he’s leaning against the wall across from me, and yet with the way his eyes are looking at me, it feels as if they’re touching my skin.
“Yup,” he states, allowing the P to pop.
My eyes shamelessly watch as his lips move, and the urge to taste them takes over. Something has shifted between us, and I’m not sure when or what caused it, but Ryland has never looked at me like this before. I’m enjoying it way more than I should.
“Are you mad at me for it?” he asks, the heat in his eyes dampening just a bit.
I tug the ends of my hoodie string, trying to look anywhere but at him, and attempt to ignore the flow of lava that is currently splashing around in my gut.
“Kind of. You shouldn’t have hurt Luke. But I also understand why you did it.”
“Do you?” he quickly asks, taking a step away from the wall.
“Yeah?” It comes out more like a question with the way he’s studying me, begging me to answer correctly, but words have yet again failed me. I swallow hard, but it doesn’t help the dryness in my throat.
“I don’t think you do, Rainbow.” Another step toward me. “Or you just don’t want to admit it.”
“Admit what?” I ask, and there is a brief look of desperation on his face. An invisible string between us, pulling tighter as the seconds tick by, and my feet involuntarily take a step toward him.
“That I care about you.” His words start a fresh ache in my chest. My lungs hang on to the air within them, and I stop in my tracks. He closes the distances between us but doesn’t touch me. My skin hums with desire, but I’m too scared to move. I don’t want to mess up this moment.
“I know you care. You’re my best friend,” I finally say. Friends care about each other. That fact alone was just displayed right here in this stairwell moments before. It does nothing to keep my heart from hammering so hard in my chest that I’m sure he can hear it.
He reaches out and places his hand onto the side of my face. I can feel him shaking, and my expression softens, knowing that he’s just as nervous as I am. Is this how we've decided to let each other in? Slowly healing each other’s wounds. Being each other’s source of light when the world gives us nothing but shadows. I've chosen to give Ryland my trust, and now he’s deathly close to my heart.
“It's more than that. Always has been.”
More.
That simple word bounces inside my head a few times before I allow it to sink into my heart. It’s making my head spin. My eyes flutter at the tingle his fingers are leaving against my skin, and I lean into the palm of his hand.
“After last night, I—” His words quiver, and he takes asecond to swallow back the emotions he’s trying to contain, but I decide right here that I’m done holding back. I don’t want to be scared anymore. I want to give Ryland my heart. “I can’t stand the thought of not being able to protect you. I want to always be here for you, more than as a friend, because I?—”
I run my hand up his back, over his shoulder, until I thread my fingers through his hair. The movement has his breath hitching. It’s a silent plea, one I’ve been waiting to make for years, as I tug him closer to my face. I’m desperate to hear what he has to say but not as badly as I want to feel his lips on my own. I watch as his lips part and his eyes widening as my mouth inches closer.
“Raine, I?—”
“What are you two doing in here?” a deep voice shouts from behind us. We both jump and release our hold on each other. “Get to class before I send you both to the principal's office!”
