She tsks and sets her mug down. “Your work has always been too great for them. Why don’t you quit already? You’ve been miserable for the past two years.”
I give her a knowing look, but she ignores it as she always does. “I’m just saying.”
“I know.” I revert my eyes to the beach ahead, watching the waves crash, wishing my best friend was sitting beside me instead of being on a phone screen. “Enough about me. How was your day?”
“Oh, you know…same ol’, same ol’. I managed to catch up on all my orders and baked a new scone recipe, which did not turn out as delicious as I had hoped, but I’ll get it there. Luke stopped by for lunch. And later I have a date!” She practically squeals the last part.
“Who is the newest victim?” I grin with the tease.
She squints in disapproval before continuing. “Some guy that my neighbor Edna swore to me, and I quote, ‘is a hottie with a body.’ It’s untelling with that woman. The last two dates she’s set me up on turned out to be a disaster, but maybe the third time’s the charm.”
She shrugs, and I release a laugh. “Please keep Luke on speed-dial just in case.”
“Of course! It’s one of the perks of having a bestie who's a cop.” She eyes me for a moment before adding, “Speaking of dating, are things still weird between you and Samuel?”
I exhale a second time. The longest relationship I have had since leaving Covewood was with a wonderful guy namedSamuel. We first met at a local coffee shop three years ago. He was standing in front of me in line and paid for my drink. He then asked if he could sit down with me, and we ended up spending most of our Saturday morning getting to know each other. Before we said our goodbyes, he asked if he could take me out on a date sometime. I said yes, mainly out of loneliness.
His company became comforting, especially since he was the complete opposite of Ryland in many ways. I liked the way Samuel looked at me with admiration and how he took my mind away from everything else. He helped me feel like I could become whomever I needed to be. And the first few years with him were blissful. I was swept away by how light life felt with him around.
It was easy to become someone who was spontaneous and flirty, someone who cared more about her looks and spent way too much money on clothes than I’d like to admit, all to keep him impressed—maybe myself too.
My favorite thing about Samuel is that he never pushed me to talk about my past, and I did the same for him. Our past never needed to be a part of our relationship. He cared for me as I was, and that was what I needed in my life at the time—until it started to feel fake. We somehow lost our spark.
“Yeah. I haven’t heard from him since the breakup,” I say.
On our three-year anniversary, Samuel asked me to move in with him, and I turned him down. Afterward, he became more reserved. For weeks, he didn’t bring it up again, and neither did I. We were both ignoring the issue, and as badly as I wanted to run away from it, after a while, it finally got to him, and he broke up with me.
Running away from problems has always been what I do best. And it has always resulted in some sort of destruction in my life.
“It was probably for the best,” I add, and her expression turns into pity.
“You were with Samuel for three years. Don’t you thinkmoving in together should have been the next step for you both? I hate that you’ve always lived alone in Rockdale.”
“I had roommates before,” I snap, feeling defensive all of a sudden.
She lifts one brow, disapproving of my tone, and says, “Don’t look at me like that. Besides the two roommates you had in college, you’ve beenalone. You never dated a guy longer than a year until Samuel came along. I kind of thought he was the one.”
The oneis exaggerating a bit, but I understand where she is coming from. The reason why I didn’t date anyone for a long time was because I wasn’t willing to chance getting attached. I keep sturdy walls around my heart, and the moment things shift into something more serious, I run.
Samuel was the first man to take his time with me and keep the past where I wanted it to be—nonexistent. It was a relief being with someone who seemed just as guarded as I was, which was why I was so shocked when he asked me to move in with him. I panicked, basically shouting the wordnoinside the fancy restaurant, earning a few scolding and wide-eyed looks. I was mortified. And so was Samuel.
“You’re one to talk. You basically have the same dating history as me and have been living alone since college too,” I reply, earning an eye roll from my best friend.
“Okay, you got me on the dating part, but in my defense, the guys around here just aren’t marriage material, but I’ve been willing to open my heart to them, unlike you. You need to stop being so protective of yourself, Raine. You’re never going to find someone until you let go of the past and move on. You deserve to be in love and to be happy.” Her face softens, a knowing look crossing her face, and it stings.
I’ve been in love before, and I have no intentions of going through a heartbreak again. I’m not sure Icanlove again. It’s as if my heart broke ten years ago and didn’t heal properly.
Olivia walks through her living room into her brightlydecorated kitchen and sets her phone on the windowsill above her sink. The sounds of running water and her clanking mug echo from the phone’s speaker. She studies the mug for a second and holds it up to the camera.
“This love should travel back home soon,” she proclaims, and a sinking feeling grows in the pit of my stomach. “I miss you.”
“I miss you more,” I admit with a huff.
“I whipped up a homemade detoxing soup and took it over to the farm this morning. I hope it helps your Mamaw get her strength back. I also took a basket of chocolate chip muffins. However, your Papaw doesn’t know that I made them with organic ingredients and no sugar. I hope he can’t tell the difference.” She grins as she starts gathering ingredients. The woman never stops baking.
“Oh, he will.” I laugh, and she does the same. I called my grandparents this morning, like I always do, but Papaw said that Mamaw wasn’t feeling like herself, that she was possibly getting over a cold caused by the seasons changing. I hate not being there to help them out, but it brings me comfort knowing I have friends who care for them.
“Thank you for checking on them often and for sneaking in some healthy foods. I don’t know what I would do without you, Liv.”
