I need to get myself together. The Army doesn't want to recruit pansies who are going to cry at the drop of a hat.
We waited for our food, and I marveled at how quickly it was handed to us on a plastic tray. Ricky laughed at the look of confusion that passed over my face as he accepted our order and turned to head toward the tables and chairs.
"They call it fast food for a reason, man."
"Yeah, but that wasreallyfast," I argued as I followed him to a table sandwiched between two bench seats. "Food cooked that fast can't be good for you, right? Is it even real?"
Ricky barked with a laugh as he dropped onto one of the benches while I took the other.
"Nobody said it was good for you, dude, but ittastesfuckin' amazing."
He handed a box to me, along with a carton of fries and a cup full of soda. I opened the box, and inside was one of the saddest-looking burgers I'd ever seen, but, man, it smelled incredible. Shredded lettuce dropped to the table as I gripped it in both hands and lifted it to my mouth. Ricky smirked as I took a bite, like he was already anticipating the reaction he knew I'd have, and when the blended tastes of the hamburger, cheese, onion, lettuce, and sauce I couldn't quite put my finger on exploded against my taste buds, I slumped back against the seat and shook my head as I chewed.
"That son of a bitch," I muttered with my mouth full.
Ricky snorted, amused. "What?"
He took a bite of his own burger and chewed, unfazed.
"My dad," I said, plucking a fry from the carton and popping it into my mouth. Instantly, I groaned and squeezed my eyes shut. "Oh my God."
We ate silently, apart from the occasional obscene moan that worked its way up my throat. Even the Coca-Cola tasted different, somehow crisper and fresher than the cans Ricky had given me at lunchtime, and I decided that McDonald's was my favorite food. Maybe not the fanciest, maybe not the most health-conscious, but I loved it.
I should've brought Grace and Lucy.
A fresh wave of guilt swept over me as I chewed the last bite of Big Mac. My sisters would've loved this. Hell, for all I knew, they'd been to McDonald's before. On one of their class trips or after school with one of their friends. Dad didn't expect as much from them.
“They’re girls who will eventually be women,” he always said.
And while they had their chores, he saw less importance in what they said or did. It was a primitive, outdated look at gender roles, but in some ways, they were better off.
But how would that change once I was gone?
I glanced at Ricky as he wiped his greasy fingers with a paper napkin.
"What are you gonna do?" I asked abruptly.
His brows tipped with confusion. "What do you mean?"
"I mean”—I gestured toward the ceiling—"now that school is done, what are your plans?"
It felt silly that I hadn't thought to ask before. It was stupid, horrible even, that I hadn't had time to care.
He shrugged and dropped the napkin to the tray. "Well, I don't know. I thought about going to the community college or something, but I don't really know what I'd wanna major in at this point. Mom isn't pushing me out of the house or anything though. She told me to take a year or two to think about it, if I wanted to, so …" He lifted one shoulder to his ear. "I might just keep working here for a while and enjoy my freedom a little."
I tried not to be jealous as I nodded. I had other things to focus on.
“So, you’re not going anywhere anytime soon?”
“Honestly, I don’t see myself ever leaving my mom,” he admitted with an almost-embarrassed grimace. “She’d be all alone. I don’t want that to happen.”
Another tinge of jealousy pinched at my heart as I pushed my mind forward and asked, "Could you do me a favor then?"
"Yeah. What's up?"
I held his gaze as I said, "Check in on my sisters, okay? I mean, while I'm gone."
He barely nodded his head, understanding flickering in his dark eyes as he replied, "I can do that."
