“Mamahated men until she met Hank. He changed things for her—changed hermind,I guess. But until he came along, she’d tell me that men want one thing fromwomen and that’s it.”
“So,that’s why you’ve never really been in a serious relationship,” he muttered, puttingthe pieces together.
“Ifyou’re told the same things over and over again, sometimes you don’t have achoice but to wonder if they’re true, you know?”
“Doyou still wonder?” He glanced at me through narrowed, studious eyes.
Ishifted on my seat and pondered the question. “When Mama met Hank, she resistedhim for a while.” Chad nodded and mentioned that he remembered. Sometimes Iforgot that, even though he and I hadn’t spoken much during those years, hestill knew what had happened in my mother’s life, and in mine. “But he was sopersistent and patient. He loved her so much, he whittled down her walls untilthere wasnothin’ left. And I loved him for that, andI hoped I’d find a man just like him. But years went by, and nobody came along,so I started to think those guys were few and far between. Like Mama had said.”
“Whatabout now? You still believe that?”
Icocked my head and thought about him and the men I’d been traveling with. AboutChad’s father and Hank. That was a lot of men to stand up against the one who’dhurt my mother and me, and I shook my head and took his hand in both of mine asI replied with certainty, “No.”
***
Theinterior of Mama’s house was covered in streamers, mylar balloons, and cheesythirtieth birthday decorations. It looked like a party supply store had gottensick and threw up all over the place. Stepping through the door, I groanedbehind an enormous grin that would’ve hurt had I not been so damn distracted bymy excitement. Chad held my hand, leading me through the jungle of shiny,ballooned 3’s and 0’s as we headed toward the backyard.
“Didyou help with this?” I asked him as we moved closer to the thump-thump-thump ofa stereo.
“Imade suggestions, but your mama did everything,” he replied with a smile beforepushing the screen door open.
Thebackyard was worse than inside. Tufts of balloons were strewn throughout theyard, held down with string and weighted balls of tinsel. The fence was linedwith banners and sparkling streamers. Tables were set up and splashed withlittle confetti 30’s that surrounded centerpieces of candles and wildflowers.It was gaudy, tacky, and beautiful and it was nothing I’d have asked formyself, but God, it was everything I never knew I wanted.
“She’shere!” Mama called from somewhere among the décor and tables. I swept my gazeto spot her running over from one of the tables. “Hey, baby girl,” she said,wrapping her arms around me. “Are you surprised?”
“Yes!”I hugged her back, tightening my grip and squeezing. “Thank you.”
“Ididn’t know who to invite,” she admitted, worriedly. “Chad helped with theguests. I hope you actually like these people.”
Ilaughed and surveyed the yard. The band was there, along with their kids;Morgan and Benny; a few people I knew from the Locust Lounge; Chad’s parents.It wasn’t a huge crowd, maybe twenty people at most, but it was intimate andexactly the way I would’ve planned it myself.
“It’sgreat,” I told her.
“Areyou sure? Because I wasn’t sure—”
“Mama.Really, it’s perfect.”
Relaxing,Mama turned her eyes on Chad and dragged her knowing gaze over his shirt.“Chad, you thinkyacould’ve changed?”
“Mama,he’s fine,” I tried to say, but he nodded respectfully and replied, “We were alittle pressed for time. I’ll run home and grab a clean shirt.”
“Mm-hmm,”my mother replied with pinched lips and teasing eyes.
“Chaddington!”Sebastian called, waving his arms from the yard. “Get the fuck—”
“Seb, come on.Please,” Jon complained, shaking his head,and I snorted at his distaste for cussing. “Remember, there are kids around.”
Withan exaggerated eye-roll, Sebastian sighed and dismissed the comment with a waveas he headed up to the deck. His arm wrapped around Chad and pulled him intight. “How youdoin’, Baby Bear? Feeling okay?”
“Oh,yeah. I mean, I’m still on steroids and takin’ these other pills three times aday for the rest of my life, but hey, otherwise, I’m great.” He grinned andactually seemedto be telling the truth about that today. “Ijustgottarun home and get some clothes.”
“Oh,cool. I’ll go with you.”
Chadnarrowed his eyes. “You’ll come with me? Why?”
Sebastianshrugged innocently. “No reason. Justwannatake alittle walk with my buddy.”
“Uh-huh,”Chad muttered, then he looked to me and his face brightened. “I’ll be back in afew minutes.”
