I thought for sure I had just lost my job; my stomach sank.
“I’ve watched your interaction with customers today, and you seem to be nervous. Is that the rightword? Like you’re expecting something bad to happen.” He paused, probably expecting me to respond. “Is everything okay?”
Refusing to meet his eyes, I played with my apron string. “I’m just getting back into the swing of things, is all.”
His gentle touch on my shoulder made me jump and he pursed his lips. “I watched how you acted when Cody came in. I have to be honest, Kennedy. I don’t know if I believe that you just fell down some stairs.”
“I’m …” Pressured to tell the truth but terrified at the same time, I raised my eyes to meet his, hoping he would know. Just know.
“If you need help, Kennedy,” he took a step closer and lowered his voice. “Please just ask.”
I froze.What if Cody found out? He’d kill me.My heartbeat increased at the realization of how true those words rang. I had to catch my breath and forced tears from forming.
He could kill me, couldn’t he? How can I get away from him? Would my mom help me? Probably not, Cody was right: she always told me I was just in the way. What am I going to do?
MUSIC BLAREDfrom the inside of our trailer, and I cringed. I had not been in the mood for a party, but thereI was. Without a choice but to enter, I took a pill to chill my attitude.
Cody’s welcome home party had started. His friends were strangers to me, and I didn’t know what to expect. Smoke rolled out the door as I walked inside. Surrounded by a cloud, I waved my hands in front of my face as if walking through a spiderweb.
Two large men blocked my view as I took note of all the people in my house. Four men sat on the edge of the couch cushions, staring at something on the coffee table. One of them leaned forward and put a rolled-up dollar bill to his nose.No way. I had never seen anyone do coke.Who the hell are these people?
Four women danced in the small spaces between furniture, three of them smoking cigarettes and laughing. The other one held a bottle of vodka and looked wasted; she stumbled instead of moving as gracefully as her friends.
Unattended steak burned on the stove. I turned off the burner. Dishes littered the kitchen counter and spilled into the sink. Pizza boxes stacked on the floor beside the overflowing garbage can and pans filled with grease sat on top of the stove. I had just cleaned the house before my shift.
Disgusted by the filthy people inside my filthy home, I shuddered. “Cody?” He wasn’t in sight, so I put my purse in the only open space on the kitchen counterand went to search for him in our bedroom. I found him.
When I opened the door, I covered my mouth with my hand to hide the gasp. A naked woman straddled my husband; her head was tilted back, and she moaned louder than I thought was necessary. Stunned, I just stood there and watched her grind her hips. I couldn’t believe my eyes. “Cody?”
He pushed her off him and pulled on a pair of jeans. “How’d you get home so fast?”
That’s his response? Not even some bullshit excuse like “it’s not what you think”?The hallway seemed to never end, I just wanted to escape.
Cody snatched my arm before I could reach the door. My bicep ached under his grip. He spun me around, his nose almost touched mine. “Answer me.” Spit hit my cheek; his breath smelled of sex. I almost gagged.
“Brian dropped me off.” Embarrassed by how he talked to me in front of his friends, people I had never met, I could barely speak.
“I told you to walk.”
I found a bit of courage through the pill I had taken and retorted. “I’m wearing a dress and heels.” For the only time in my life, I fought back.
Chapter 27
Jake, age twenty-four—December 2009
JURORS REMAINEDsilent through my retelling of the incident. I knew my actions would equate to life in prison; somehow it didn’t seem that scary anymore. As instructed, I gave my final account of exactly what had transpired the night I shot Cody Miller.
“It was raining so hard I could barely see fifty feet in front of me. It was late. So late it was early: around three in the morning. I had music blaring as loud as my speakers would go. I needed to stay awake long enough to make it to Talkeetna.
“I was already angry because I got turned around in some little town I’d never been to before. I was running low on gas, and I doubted any gas station would be open that late.
“I passed my exit at the cut-off before Susitna North and figured I’d catch the next one instead of backtracking. The rain hadn’t stopped for hours; it poured hard enough for the road signs to blur. I took thenext exit so I could turn back and that’s when I saw her.
“There was something in the headlights—a dark figure—and I slammed on my brakes. At first, I thought it must be a dog, but it stood on two feet and was skinny. So skinny. I thought, ‘Why would a person be out in this storm?’
“It was cold, too cold for a lady in a torn dress to be walking down the middle of the road. She turned and squinted at the bright light. I inched toward her, and she didn’t even move out of the way.”
The memory of blood running down her face and the sadness in her eyes took my voice. I cleared my throat and continued. “I couldn’t believe my eyes. I recognized her through the bruises and blood. We crossed paths in Dallas. Miss Kennedy had been the waitress in a restaurant me and my friends used to eat at. She was nice to us. Unlike so many other people in the city.
