“You can. But I’m asking you, please, let me take care of you.” I brush a loose strand of her hair behind her ear. “I can stay at your place later, but tonight at least, stay with me.”
The orderly comes in with the wheelchair and she stares at it like he’s asking her to climb onto a mechanical bull. I help her down from the bed and into the chair, and crouch in front of her.
“Good. Let’s get you home, get you better.” She tries to smile, but it’s half-hearted. I kiss her forehead and head for the car.
As I walk to the garage, I grab my phone and turn it back on. I’m expecting voicemails and texts from Cyn’s office, and I’m not disappointed. Over twenty missed calls and messages. I shoot her a quick text.
Chase
I’m okay. Ren got beat up by an ex. I’ll call you when I’m back home and have her settled in.
Boss Lady
You damn well better call me. Be safe.
* * *
As we pull into the driveway, the door to the house flies open, and Pongo bounds down the steps, Devin hot on his heels and yelling after him. I stop Pongo before he jumps on Ren, but he still licks her face when she leans over to greet him. It’s the first genuine smile I’ve seen on her today.
“I’m sorry! I told him tostaybut he straight up saidfuck thatand bolted. He’s been pawing at the door since he heard the main gate.”
“He’s okay. He knows people he loves are worried, that’s all.” Ren rubs the dog’s head.
“I ordered pizza, so you’d have something to eat. I hope that’s okay—do you even like pizza? Fuck. I can go get something else if you?—”
“Thanks, Dev. That’s sweet of you,” she responds flatly and walks toward the door like she’s in a trance. Pongo stays right beside her. She needs him far more than I do right now.
Dev turns to me and whispers, “What the fuck, man?”
“I’m trying to figure that out, Dev,” I snap, pushing past him and following Ren into the house. I watch her disappear into my room before I turn back to Devin. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be a dick, it’s just…a lot.”
“She doesn’t like pizza, does she?. I kind of…panicked. I thought about ordering something better, but I don’t know what she likes and I figured everyone likes pizza. Don’t they? I cleaned up the guest room, and I cleaned up my apartment so Dani and her mom can stay in there if they need to.” He’s talking a mile a minute and I can’t keep up with him right now, so I put both hands on his shoulders and look him in the eye.
“D, I need you to chill.” He nods and takes a deep breath. “Dani and her mom aren’t coming over. We’ve got that covered, but thank you for straightening up. How did the game go?”
“Uhm, we lost. In a shootout. Guy went left when I could have sworn he showed right.” His shoulders slump and he leans back against the wall, running his hands through his hair. “Fuck, Chase.” He rubs the back of his neck and looks back at me, fear and worry on his face. “I don’t want her to leave us. You. I mean, Pongo likes her and I…it’s… you’ve been happy, like, really happy since the other night. I don’t want…what if she?—?”
“Hey, hey.” I grab the back of his head and pull him in for a hug. This has less to do with Ren and me and more to do with the two women in our lives that left the biggest scars on both of our hearts.
Our mother left him in grocery stores, bars, and even the car once or twice while she danced through life in a drug soaked haze. I grew up knowing our mother had an addict and needed help. Devin grew up thinking mom never wanted him. Cassie and Devin were close, too. She cared about him and for him better than I did sometimes. Devin found her that morning, and I don’t think he’s ever recovered from that. He hides it well. Better than I do, anyhow.
“I’m gonna go up and stay with Ren.” He nods and I take the stairs two at a time. I poke my head in to see if she’s already asleep. She’s sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at the floor. She jumps when I sit beside her, putting my arm over her shoulder and pulling her closer. “How are you holding up, Sunshine? Hungry? Thirsty?”
“I shouldn’t be here. He threatened you. Said if I didn’t do what he wanted, he’d shoot you in the head.”
“He’s not going to do that.”
“You don’t know him!” she yells, wincing as she does. “He’s in a gang, Chase. I should have told you, I should have told you everything, but I’m terrified of him. It’s why I thought we should stop at friends. I didn’t want you to find out about this. To find out how weak and pitiful I am. I convinced myself you’d leave me. Or Cynthia would tell you we couldn’t be together. I should have told you.”
“That’s the concussion talking, Renate. You’re strong, smart, brave, and not the one to blame in this situation. Besides, you’re telling me about him now. We’ll be okay, Ren. He isn’t going to scare me away.” I kiss the top of her head. “You don’t owe me explanations. I want you to be happy and safe.”
“But…you shouldn’t have to deal with this. With me. I’m not good for you and your image. I’m not what you should have.” She reaches for her things, shoving them into her purse. “I should go. I shouldn’t be here.”
“You just got out of the hospital, Ren! He broke into your house!”
“It doesn’t matter. He can’t find me here. He’ll hurt you, and you and I aren’t even dating.”
“Why does that matter? Why are you so worried about that?”
