A warmth started in my chest, followed by the slow pound of my heart. Growing up, I’d had a close family, always surrounded by siblings and cousins. Now, I had another family. They couldn’t see me, and yet they accepted me, protected me.
It was fucking amazing.
I looked at each and every one of them, landing last on Fyn. I loved them, I loved him, and now it was my turn to protect them.
Stepping forward, I said, “I need to speak to Tatas.” When Fyn didn’t share my words, I peeked over my shoulder at him. His arms were crossed, and his expression was hard. He was afraid to lose me.
“Sunshine, I need to do this.”
He remained quiet, lips clamped.
“I heard your request, Caleb,” Dontilvynsan said, glancing at Fyn with a stern glare. “Commander Bimwoxcol, ping Tatas.”
“No,” Fyn protested.
Dontilvynsan didn’t even look at his little brother. “Your mate requested to speak to Tatas, and I will not silence him.”
“Thank you, Don,” I said, knowing he would hear my words echoed in Fyn’s mind. I glanced at my Fyn. “Trust me.”
“I do,” he said, “but I cannot lose you.”
“You won’t.”
We didn’t have another chance to speak, because Tatas appeared on the front monitor. Their jello form wiggled and swirled with color. While I didn’t know exactly what it meant, I guessed it was because they were upset.
“Caleb, you must return,” Tatas said.
“You can see me?” I asked.
They bobbed. “Yes. You must return. It is our duty to take you to the beyond. Your mind cannot be lost to the hive and future generations. You must return to the quagmire that will become the future.”
“No, I belong to Zoltilvoxfyn. This is my choice.”
“You are going to rip apart.”
Fyn’s breath caught and his arms moved around me. I hadn’t even heard him come up behind me.
“Yes,” I answered because what they said was the truth. I couldn’t deny it. Well, I could, but what would be the point? Tatas would know I was lying. Sunshine would know I was lying. Hell, the whole ship would know I was lying if they could see me. I was vanishing by the second. “I don’t care.”
Their form leaned to the side. “You do not care?”
“No. I never believed in the afterlife, so I’m not afraid to cease to exist. I choose to stay with my mate.”
“Your tie to reality.”
Fyn’s breath sharpened, and from the corner of my eye, I spied his tail thrashing.
“My tether.”
Tatas stared at me and the silence in Command swelled with tension. This was my choice, but in the end, if they threatened to destroy the ship, I didn’t know what I would do. Leaving Fyn would… I couldn’t even formulate the words, but I couldn’t allow him or the others to be killed.
They bobbed. “Your choice, but we fear you will regret it. You will be nothing, Caleb. You might wish to change your mind in the last moments, but when you become too weak for even your mate to see, it will be too late for you to move on.”
“I won’t regret it,” I said with complete confidence. Any day with Fyn was worth the price to be paid.
“You are out of our grasp.” They shifted to Kal. “We retract any offer of friendship. As soon as our ship is repaired, we shall return to our plane.”
“Understood. Should you change your mind, send a note.” Kal barely tilted his head to the side, acknowledging Tatas.
