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Page 24 of Heidi Lucy Loses Her Mind

Mel glances at me; when I don’t say anything, she looks over at Calvin.

“No,” she says. “You heard right.”

I clasp my hands tightly, fighting the urge to fidget. All this anxious, unsettled energy is still brewing within me, and I swallow down my panic.

“But the police will take care of it,” she goes on in a no-nonsense voice. “Don’t worry about that.”

I can’t tell if her words are intended for Calvin or for me.

“Yeah,” Calvin says, and he still sounds unsure. “But still. Murder is, like, a big deal.”

He’s right. Murder is a very big deal. A huge deal.

I force myself to take deep breaths, in through my nose, out through my mouth.

Did I know Carmina Hildegarde was going to die? Did I know something was going to happen to her? Could I have stopped this?

In through your nose, out through your mouth.I squeeze my hands into fists, letting my fingernails dig into my palms. I squeeze tighter, intensifying the sensation. The sharp, lightning-bolt sting of my nails grounds me.

You are alive,I tell myself.You feel pain, which means you are not defeated.

I am alive, which means there is still hope.

I can handle this.

“All right,” Soren says, and I look quickly at him. He’s been quiet so far, listening and observing, but now his eyes are on me, narrowed with concern. “Let’s close shop for the day. We should all go rest.”

“Agreed,” Mel and Gemma say at the same time, and I’m surprised to see that they’re looking at me too. The two of them stand up in unison, their chairs scraping against the cheerful checkered tile.

“Come on,” Mel says, making a shooing motion toward the door.

“Everyone out,” Gemma says.

“But—” Eric says, breaking off when Gemma strides over to him, throws her arm around his shoulder, and clamps one hand over his mouth.

He looks down at her with outrage, but she just smiles serenely at him.

“Don’t you have a job?” she says.

His shoulders slump as he mumbles something behind her hand.

She nods. “That’s what I thought. You—hey. Hey!” she says as Eric grabs her hand and pulls it away from his mouth with ease. She struggles against his grip, but he doesn’t let go; he glares down at her.

Gemma puts her hand on her hip. “Oh, bite me,” she says, still trying to free herself.

“Maybe I will,” he says, cocking one eyebrow at her, and I wrinkle my nose in disgust. Then he removes her arm from around him and moves over to me. He leans down, gives me a quick kiss on the forehead, and turns away again, heading for the door. Just as he’s about to exit, he looks over his shoulder and speaks to Soren. “Keep an eye on my sister,” he says.

“Hey,” Calvin says before I can protest. “Eric. Do you not like me? Why are you saying that to him?”

Eric snorts, looking Calvin over. “How old are you?” he says, not unkindly.

My youngest employee flushes a dull pink. “Twenty-three,” he mutters.

Eric nods. “When you grow up big and strong, you can take care of my sister too,” he says with a smirk.

I roll my eyes—something I do with Eric more than with anyone else in my life. “Get out,” I say, pointing to the door.

“I’m going, I’m going,” my brother says, still smirking. He glances at Gemma, and his smile softens. “I’ll call you later.” The bell over the door jingles as he pushes it open, and then he’s gone.