Page 96 of His Atonement
The chorea and dystonia are daily and last for long periods of time, both of which have caused many issues with simple day to day things. Even if I can get them under control before we leave the cabin or don't have either as soon as I get up, they're both manifesting more frequently throughout my days.
My coordination is slipping a lot.
I've lost my balance more than once in front of various people, and actually fell in front of Grace, which did not help with her pestering over what's wrong with me. I dropped a lighting rig on the final day of my photo project because of muscle contractions, almost fell from a ladder and would have if Havok didn't have super fast reflexes.
Zan has had to help me more than I'd like because my hands seem to be affected quite a bit. Tremors are still in sets of three but now they happen in groups of three, sets of three, then I go impossibly rigid right after. That's probably been my biggest struggle with the physical progression; losing the ability to use my hands how and when I want is maddening.
Words slip my mind more often. Just words, but I have to search pretty hard sometimes for even simple ones and I hate that too.
Basically, things are moving in the exact direction I figured they would but thankfully, they mostly stopped today. Thankfully, my disease had enough compassion to seemingly place itself on hold so I can have the wedding I always dreamt of in order to marry the man I love more than anything, then celebrate it with the people I love most.
I'm super grateful for that.
"Are you ready for your gift?" Zan asks as he finishes stripping. "Or do you need to smoke first?"
I hold up the joint. "I am smoking."
"That is merely a little taste. You forget I know you all too well, darling. When you smoke it is no less than two bowls or three joints, usually more, and since that is only your second joint since we left the party, I'm curious if you'll need a third."
"I'm good.” I smile, and put out my weed. "I've been feeling good all day actually. Just happy and horny."
"Exactly the way I like you." A very naked, semi-erect and growing more so by the second Zan says as he rounds the corner of the island and wraps me in his arms. "Now, remove this gorgeous dress so it does not get ruined, but leave everything else on, then come with me."
I arch a brow, reach around, and cup his bare butt cheeks. "Even my new toy?"
"Oh no. I will be removing that momentarily because it will surely get in the way of all that I have planned.” He brushes his lips against mine and slips his hand under my skirt to do just what he said, which makes my entire body shiver. ”Naked. You. Now. I want to see this new jewelry, and this garter belt you've been taunting me with for hours."
And because I like it way too much when Zan gets all bossy, I let him unzip my dress, drop it to the floor, and step out of it with everything else still on.
"Gods you are a vision, my darling mate.” He eyes me appreciatively and trails a finger over my collar bone, my chest, circles a nipple then tugs the chain and smiles when I hiss. "No creature before has ever been so beautiful."
I moan as he drops his head and kisses my nipples, flattens his tongue against them before he tugs the chain with his teeth. And because he makes me a needy, horny, wanton mess, I pull him to me, Zan's hard as stone cock pressed against my stomach while I shamelessly roll my hips.
"Baby… " The word is exhaled on a deep breath as he does it again, but when I try to reach between us, trying to get my hands on his dick to put it inside me, Zan stops.
"My surprise, darling."
"But I want you now. Your surprise can wait a few minutes until then, right?"
He shakes his head, caresses my jaw and kisses me. "If I do not surprise you with my gift now, then I fear we shall become too carried away and I will forget all about it."
“Fine," I pout. "But if your gift doesn't lead to your cock in my pussy after hours of torturing me then I'm going to have to take drastic measures."
"Such as?" Zan takes my hand and starts leading me to the bedroom.
"That one dildo you gave me is pretty close to the real thing. I can stick it on the side of the tub and fuck myself if it comes down to it."
"Perhaps you can do that later while I watch. Impale your pretty little cunt while I fuck your perfect mouth but for now…" He searches my eyes for a minute before he opens the bedroom door. "For now I would like very much to give you my gift."
My eyes widen as I look at our bedroom that has been completely transformed into something else entirely.
The walls and windows are covered in beautiful thick black tapestries, sparkly black sheaths of fabric layered over top of them that shimmer against nothing but candlelight—most likely the secret work of a very pregnant fae or a lone wolf at some point during the night.
Dozens and dozens of red and white candles sit on various covered flat surfaces, a very ambient and warm glow cast against the black fabric.
Our bed is covered with a black satin sheet, more tapestries hang from the four posts, and at the foot of the bed is a shiny silver tray, one as wide as the mattress but only a quarter of the length and that tray has various tools spread out on it; tools I know all too well.
But in the center of the open area, probably only two or three feet of space between that and each of the walls, is a very large, very shiny black wooden table, half of it a solid panel while the other is split down the middle and spread wide, complete with leather shackles at all four corners.
