Page 6 of Conan
“Demi, don’t pretend to be dense,” Luna hisses. “It’s not a pretty look for you, and you know we’re a team. Now, that includes Kodiak and Conan.”
I bristle when she names the last one becausethat manhas become a thorn in my side. He’s always there and never gives me any peace. If he’s not in my face, his belongings are. It’s pissing me off to the point where I’m ready to start tossing his shit out of the window and changing the locks, adding an extra deadbolt or two to keep him out of my abode.
He just doesn’t know when to quit!
“What are you talking about? I’m a badass, gorgeous… a heartbreaker,” I tack on at the end of my list of attributes.
My self-esteem issues when it pertains to my looks aren’t in question, my psyche however, is. I’m damaged beyond repair, and when someone is as broken as I am, there’s no coming back from it. Especially when that came about at as young of an age as I was when the—ordeal, for lack of a better word, started.
“Now you’re being obtuse,” she sighs, slumping in her chair as if dealing with me is a hardship.
Which to give her credit,it is.
I’m not an easy person to love. I know that for a fact because outside of my dad and Luna, nobody ever has. Not truly. I’ve had lovers that wanted me to believe they did, but when I pushed them away, they didn’t fight for me, not really. A few brush-offs and they were gone with the snap of my fingers.
Easy.
As.
That.
When I tried that technique on Luna when we first met, she laughed at me. No seriously, she laughed in my face and rolled her eyes at me. She was like a damn leech, adhering herself to mefor life. Now, I wouldn’t know what to do without her—she’s become an extension of me, and I am an extension of her. Where you see one of us, you’ll usually find the other.
We’re as thick as thieves, magnetically connected.
Sisters from another mister.
I’m not sure anyone would find my company worthwhile without her in it. She’s the one who draws people to her, her light shines brightly around her, making others want to be her friend. I’m her tagalong, and I’m okay with that because I trust her intuitions, they far exceed my own.
“Demi!” she shouts, snapping her fingers in front of my face. “Where did you go?”
“Down memory lane,” I answer, smiling so she doesn’t linger on that subject and dissect it. She would’ve made a fantastic therapist. “Good memories, Luna. All about you and me, and the way we levitated toward each other when we met.”
“You certainly didn’t make it easy,” she mutters.
“Nothing worth having ever is,” I counter, my tone earnest but sobering. “Have I told you how much I love you today, sis?”
“You have, but I don’t mind hearing it over and over again,” she chuckles. “Reminds me how important you are in my life, Demi.”
“Okay, enough of the heavy shit. Let’s get back to business,” I suggest, unsure how much more weight my heart can take today without descending into chaos. Tapping my finger against the computer screen, I clear my throat, focusing on the task at hand. “When are you putting this one up for preorder?”
“Not until I see how far I can get into it without breaking down into a sobbing mess,” she conveys. “I’m aware this one hits close to home and may get the better of me, and that’s not taking into account these hormones. I’m prepared for that, but I can’t help but worry how it’ll affect you.”
I bob my head, understanding where she’s coming from. I’m her proofreader. I scan each line, looking for plot holes, misspelled words—because sometimes her brain runs faster than her fingers so she loses an ‘E’ or an ‘I’ at times or uses the wrong their, there, and they’re or something to that degree. I also ensure she doesn’t miss an arc from one book to the next.
Gotta keep those storylines flowing!
Everything needs to be tied into a pretty bow for readers or they’ll protest.
Vehemently.
To make sure neither of us forget, since she’s more of a pantser than a plotter, I started doing spreadsheets with the important details, such as character names, including any kidsthat are born or expected, plus the overwhelming themes of that particular book. That way, if a storyline arcs over from one book to another, I can remind her that she still has a bad guy in the dungeon, or she left her heroine in labor. I’ve read a few of her incoming emails so I know how vicious some reviewers can be when they don’t get the answers they’re expecting.
I can dig that, don’t keep me hanging folks or my claws come out!
I’m of the same mentality as they are.
Cliffhangers suck, story arcs can make you want to pull your hair out by the roots, desperately wanting the next book in the series, a-s-motherfucking-p, but as Luna’s proofer I’ve come to the undeniable conclusion that at times, theyarea necessary evil.