Zio
After my walkon the beach with Armand, we returned to our separate rooms. We had a little time to ourselves before we met up again for dinner. It gave me a chance to contact my roommate and best friend, Rigby Pasquali.
His friendly face set me at ease when he accepted my video call. He was handsome, with wavy sandy-blond hair, purple-rimmed glasses, and a kind smile. I had been so scared about living with a stranger as a graduate student, but it had worked out better than my best dreams. “Hey, Zio! How’s paradise?”
I lifted my laptop up to show him the view out the window over my shoulder of the beautiful beach. “Heavenly.”
“Wow, talk about the best spring break ever.”
Setting my computer back on the desk, I made myself comfortable in the office chair. “It is, but something weird happened I was hoping I could talk to you about.”
He grew concerned. “Oh no, is everything okay?”
“It’s not a bad thing. I’m just super confused, and I know you’re one of the only people who can help me.”
“You know I’d do anything for you. What’s going on?”
The only way I could get help with my problem was to be honest about it. “I met someone at the hotel bar last night.”
“Oh!”
Considering I had been single as long as Rigby had known me, his startled reaction wasn’t surprising. “They’re beautiful, charming, funny, and so perfect, I don’t understand how they’re real. We only met yesterday, but they make me feel so many things that nobody else ever has.”
“That’s awesome!” He toned down his enthusiasm when he noticed my hesitant expression. “What’s the problem?”
“I—it’s—” Making myself say it was difficult, even though Rigby wouldn’t judge me for it. “He’s a man.”
Rigby’s eyebrows flew up in shock, since he knew I was straight. “Oh.”
“Although he’s a guy, he lights me up inside. He’s gorgeous, but for some inexplicable reason, he thinks I’m cute and interesting.”
“Youarecute and interesting,” Rigby insisted. “That’s the least surprising thing you’ve said so far.”
I fidgeted as I tried to explain myself. “He’s so playful and flirty, which has been a lot of fun when I’m not too in my head about enjoying it. And not to get too TMI, but he smellsso fucking goodthat it makes my dick hard, which hasdefinitelynever happened before. I don’t understand what’s happening to me.”
“It sounds like you’re trying to talk yourself out of being attracted to him.”
“What if he kisses me and I want more? What am I supposed to do when he wants to have sex?”
Rigby was logical, as always. “Do you want to kiss or have sex with him?”
“Maybe? I have no idea.” I ruffled my hair with a frustrated sigh. “Half of me is convinced it could never happen because he’s too perfect to be with me. The other part of me—well…”
“You can tell me, Zio. I won’t judge you about any of this,” Rigby said in a gentle voice. “I’m bi, so trust me, I’ve been at the crossroads of confusion about this issue.”
“How did you figure it out?”
His wry grin spoke volumes. “When I realized that fantasizing about men and women both ended in an orgasm.”
“Last night was the first time…” I trailed off with a pained groan of embarrassment. When he didn’t say anything, I forced myself to continue. “I didn’t mean to, but I couldn’t avoid imagining him while I…”
Mercifully, he got the idea without me finishing my sentence. “There’s nothing wrong with that.”
It was true, but I struggled to accept it. “But what I did wasso weird.”
He chuckled but not unkindly. “It’s really not.”
“No, you don’t get it. I could still smell him on me from when he held my hand at the bar. When I fantasized about him, I got off on tasting his cologne on my skin.” I groaned as I hid my face in shame. “Oh god, it sounds worse when I say it out loud. What the fuck is wrong with me?”
