Page 35 of Cinder & Secrets
When he asked me to spend the weekend with him before returning to campus, there wasn’t a chance in hell I was going to say no.
My plan is to take all my bags with me because I will be heading directly to campus from River’s on Sunday afternoon. I hate having to take so much luggage with me on the bus, but I don’t really have any other options. And I can’t take my mom’s car this time because, well, I’m not coming back home. Plus, she wasn’t all that thrilled with me that I kept her car three days longer than I said I would last time I borrowed it.
“Were your parents upset when they found out you weren’t staying with them your last weekend before you return to campus?”
“No, I wouldn’t say that. Maybe a little disappointed that I didn’t want them to drive me, but nothing other than that.”
“Do they knowwhereyou’re going to be this weekend?”
“As far as they know, I’ll be at UVA. I told them I was officially allowed to move into my dorm tomorrow and that I’ll be staying with Maisie and her family tonight and then heading to campus in the morning.”
In truth, move-in day isn’t until Sunday, but I figured a little white lie wouldn’t hurt anyone. Seems to be a recurring theme of mine as of late. Half-truths, omissions, and flat-out lies, no matter how small. I used to pride myself on being someone who could be taken at her word, but now... Guilt twists my stomach into a tight knot that I force myself to breathe through.
“What aboutyourparents? Were they upset when Lyric left two weeks earlier than planned?” I quickly tack on, not giving him a chance to comment on me openly admitting that I lied. He probably thinks I’m a very untrustworthy person and that thought does not sit right with me.
Iamtrustworthy... At least, I used to be. Now I don’t know what I am.
“Not upset so much as afraid they’re gonna end up with another grandchild.” He chuckles, the sound deep and rich.
“I take it they’re not over the moon about her living with Kai?”
“That’s one way of putting it. Don’t get me wrong, they like the guy and all. It’s just...”
“Lyric is their baby,” I finish for him, already knowing exactly what he was going to say.
“Exactly.”
“And how areyoudealing with all this? I don’t have brothers, so I don’t know how this works, but aren’t you supposed to be super overprotective and hate any guy she’s with?”
“I wouldn’t go that far. Lyric and I have always been close, and while yes, I will always look out for her, I’ve always trusted her enough to make her own decisions. She’s the one who has to live with the consequences if things don’t work out.”
“She’s lucky to have you.”
“She’s lucky to have you, too.”
“I don’t know if I’d go that far.” I blow out a heavy breath.
“We’re not doing anything wrong.” He’s quick to reassure me.
“If that were true, we wouldn’t be hiding it from her.”
“We’re not hiding... We’re just enjoying each other’s company without the complications of outside sources.”
“Not sure it matters what we’re doing, only that we aren’t truthful about it.”
“Are you having second thoughts about coming?”
“What? No, of course not.” I shake my head even though he can’t see me.
“Good. Because I’ve been dreaming about the feel of you tight and wet around me all fucking day.” He practically groans intothe phone, his words sending my heart rate skyrocketing in an instant.
“Just all day?” I play coy.
“Okay, ever since you left my apartment the last time. Only now it’s more prominent because I know in just a few hours, I’m gonna have you pinned beneath me again, and, Red, I can’t fucking wait.”
“Me neither,” I admit softly, having to concentrate really hard to keep my voice from breaking around the edges.
The things this man says to me... I wish I could bottle them up so that one day, when this is all over, I can go back and revisit these moments. Moments that make me question everything I thought I wanted.
