I can’t help but smile. I wish I could see what he looks like down there. Collin, I’m learning, isn’t at all like I expected. He’s sexy and smooth, sure, but he’s also full of life. He treats things with an almost child-like wonder. It’s magnetic.
I don’t think I’ll ever forget the expression on his face when Nelson called me a tramp. He looked like he would defend my honor to the death. It was the first time anyone—besides my sisters—has ever cared enough about me to look like that.
And he’s down there sleeping on the floor when there’s a perfectly good half of the bed with his name on it.
“Collin,” I say into the darkness.
More rustling. “Hmm?”
“Do you want to sleep in the bed?”
Silence.
“I mean, if you really love it down there, I don’t want to take that away from you, but…”
Before I can get another word in, he vaults over the top of me and bounces onto the other half of the bed.
“Thank goodness. I was going to have a serious crick in my neck if I spent the whole night in that position.”
I bite my fist to stop from giggling.
“You sure you don’t mind?” he asks.
I feel him slide under the covers, though we aren’t touching.
“I don’t mind,” I whisper. “I—” I stop.
“You what?”
“I’m glad you’re here,” I whisper.
He’s quiet for a second, and then he finds my hand under the covers and squeezes it.
“I’m on your team,” he whispers. “Whatever you need.”
I freeze. For so long, I’ve carried the weight of Nelson and his impact on me on my own. I haven’t let Poppy or Rose in because I don’t want to be a burden. But I can’t deny it feels really good to know Collin has my back. The relief pours over me like steaming water over fresh coffee beans.
I turn my head, and he’s staring at me. I don’t deserve to ask this question, but he’s right there, looking at me like he’d be willing to move a mountain for me.
“Do you think”—I swallow—“you could hold me tonight?”
“Hold…you?” he says, his voice breaking at the end of the word.
“Yeah. I—” I break off. What am I going to say?
I’m scared. I don’t want to be alone. I need you, and that scares me too.
“Of course. Come here.”
I pause for a beat, and then I feel his arms tugging me into his chest. We’re not skin to skin. I’m in a baggy t-shirt, and he’s in a skin-tight one. But I can still feel the heat radiating off his body. It’s nice. Warm. Safe.
“Is this okay?” his voice rumbles over me.
I’m the little spoon to his big one. I nod, though I know he can’t see my face.
He readjusts ever so slightly, squeezing me a little tighter around my waist.
I fall asleep to the thought that I’m real lucky to have Collin on my side.
