Page 2 of Outside the Lines
Probably the oddest compromise I'd ever made, but that's exactly what ended up happening as I got back into my car and drove as slow as I possibly could, all while keeping the emergency signal on of course, all the way to the house. I was late by about ten minutes, not good at all, but as the counselor on duty with me that night, Kim, saw who I was letting in, I think all was forgotten. She hurried to get things together for our new arrival while I hurried to put away the groceries.
Kim was at least twice my age and most of the people living at the shelter treated her like a grandmother. I liked working with her because she treated me like I actually had a brain and could do more than just mop the kitchen, unlike some of the other counselors who promised that I'd get real jobs once I graduated. That wasn't the way this was supposed to work, but I did say that. I didn't want to make enemies of my co-workers before I even officially had that title.
"Welcome to Trinity House," I told the kid as we stood in the lobby. Kim hurried toward us, paperwork and plastic bags looking heavy in her arms before she spread everything out on the little side table just off the entrance. The desk had broken the day before and we were making due. Kim handed me the new resident packet, and I led the kid over to Kim's office, a little room off to the side. I'd done an intake before, but not on my own. Thankfully I didn't end up having to fumble my way through one as Kim came in behind us. I moved aside so that she could sit at her desk, but she nudged me into her chair instead.
"All right." I got comfortable and pulled a pen toward me. "So I'm Alex, and that's Kim, and this is Trinity House. It's a shelter for LGBT homeless youth. If you want to, you can stay here until you're eighteen, and then we'll work on transitional housing for you. You won't be dumped back on the streets."
The kid took a seat across the desk and I saw that the carton of food was still in their hand. They clutched it protectively, and I tried not to stare. I still couldn't tell if I was looking at a boy or a girl. The clothes were men's for sure, but the kid's face could have been either. I didn't dwell on it.
"We do have a few rules here. No fighting, bedroom doors have to be open anytime you aren't changing, you can't eat in your rooms, no sneaking between rooms at night, no relationships beyond friendships, and you have to get clean or stay clean," I told them, hoping I was remembering everything. I would have rather just set the kid up in a room and let them do whatever they wanted as long as they were safe, but there were rules that had to be followed, and it was for everyone's benefit.
The kid nodded, but I'd make them sign a piece of paper stating that they agreed anyway. I handed them a personal form where they were supposed to fill out their information for me along with a pen but quickly found myself frowning as they skipped over the name and previous address portion along with the gender question. The only thing they did fill out was their date of birth and their sexuality.
The kid across from me was fourteen. Jesus. I tried not to look like I wanted to murder someone as they handed the paperwork back to me. They weren't the youngest kid that I knew of having been through here; that title went to Lucy, who had been twelve when her teenage brother called to have her picked up because their parents were kicking her out. She'd graduated well before I'd joined Trinity House, but her file had been one of the ones Kim had handed me on my first day there when she'd told me to familiarize myself with their most notable graduates.
"You didn't fill out your name," I pointed out needlessly. They shrugged. "We need to know it. For our records."
The kid got to their feet and started heading out of the office and nearly got past Kim when she stopped them. "It's alright dear, we'll skip that part for tonight. Come back and have a seat. We have some things for you."
I stared at the kid as they silently turned around and came back to the desk. Had they really been ready to walk because of their name? I shared a look with Kim and put the paperwork aside for now. There was plenty more of it, but the rest of the intake could wait a minute, I supposed. I heard the kids in their rooms above me starting to get restless. It was almost time for dinner. If Kim and I could get this kid to stay for a meal and then maybe the night, then whoever came in tomorrow could work on them a bit more and maybe get that information out of them. I hoped so, because if the helpless look in the kid's eyes were anything to go by, this kid was being crushed by whatever secrets they were hiding.
"This is the stuff that every new resident gets when they come to stay with us, no matter how long they choose to," Kim said as she started pulling out items from the plastic bags. I didn't focus on the stuff. I just watched the kid. There were clothes, socks, a toothbrush, toothpaste, deodorant, and other essentials. And some caramel candies. I'd put those in yesterday.
The kid didn't touch any of it though, only dropped their chin to their chest and stared at it all like it was all so overwhelming. "Go ahead. Take it," I said, trying to be as gentle as possible. I was so completely out of my element here. I should have insisted that Kim do this intake, and I should have been starting dinner. I wasn't ready for an intake, even a supervised and guided one like this. Maybe I wasn't even ready to be a counselor if I couldn't even get this kid to open up and give me something as simple as a name.
The kid plucked the pair of socks from the table and held them close to their chest. "Thanks," they mumbled before getting up again. "What's next?"
I got up too and put my hands on the desk. "It's all yours. All of it. And if something runs out or gets a hole in it and can't be worn anymore,then we'll get you another." The kid was so small, so frail. And now that my anger was giving way to sympathy, all I wanted to do was hug them close and promise that whatever, whoever, had hurt them, wouldn't be able to do so again. But even though I didn't know much, I was pretty sure that attempting to hug this kid would end badly.
"All of it?" They looked up at me. I nodded and pushed a sweatshirt toward them.
"Alex, I'll get started on dinner for the kids. Why don't you show our new guest upstairs so that they can get cleaned up and changed to eat?" Kim said before quietly letting herself out of the office, and then I was alone with a kid about whom I knew nothing, but had many hopes, all of them good.
"You're safe here," I promised.
"You don't know what that means."
The honest pain in that simple statement broke my heart. "Maybe not, but I won't let anything happen to you here at least."
The kid nodded and dropped it as they came forward to touch the other things on the desk. "All of it's mine?"
I nodded. "You thought you only got socks?"
"Need socks the most," they said softly.
"I need something to call you and I think I'll go with Socks." I'd been joking when I said it, hoping to get a little smile from the kid. And I got the barest traces of one. But I hadn't expected them to nod.
"Good a name as any." They leaned forward and took the intake form and quickly spelled out their new name in the line.
I wasn't sure if they were serious, but then they stuck out their hand. "Hi. I'm Socks," they said as if it was the most normal name in the world.
I took their offered hand gently in my own and tried not to focus on the chill of their fingers against my palm. "Alex. Nice to meet you. I'm glad you decided to give Trinity House a try."
Socks pulled their hand back quickly. "I can leave in the morning?"
I nodded. "You're not a prisoner. Can I get you to go upstairs with me now? Show you to a room so that you can get ready for dinner?"
Socks gave me a little shrug and then I was leading them up the staircase to the second floor where three rooms and a bathroom waited. The only door that was closed was the one to the bathroom, and I could see boys and girls hanging out in their rooms. "This is the boy room," I said, pointing. Socks didn't go in so I moved to the next. "And this is the girl room." Socks didn't head in there either.
