Page 111 of The Champion
So there Jameson and Tommy were drinking one beer rightafter another and then peeing in the balloons. Around one that morning they hadenough for their war against Spencer.
Only problem was Spencer caught onto them peeing into theballoons and decided he was going to one up them and sprayed them with WD-40.If you’ve never seen what this does to balloons, it’s entertaining. Thechemicals eat through the balloon in about five seconds.
Spencer, his intelligence soaring that night, enlistedLogan, who refused to go to sleep, into sitting behind Jameson and Tommy andspraying the balloons with WD-40 before they launched them at Spencer. Needlessto say they exploded mid-air all over them.
“Abort mission!” Tommy hollered in complete horror soakedwith his own urine. He looked at Jameson. “I’d be okay if it was my own piss, Ido that at least once a month but yours…” he shivered. “I can’t handle that. Ican’t.”
Jameson, who was hiding behind me for cover, lookedaround, tipped his baseball cap up and grinned. “Oh Tommy, it’s just my urine.I’m clean.”
Tommy, who had dodged under a canvas camping chair,glared and ran after him.
“C’mere asshole, I’m gonna piss on you and see how youlike it!”
Jameson shot out into the woods to avoid him with Tommyfollowing.
After making sure the kids were still sleeping, I satdown next to Ami.
“I have bets that one of them ends the night with abroken bone or stitches.”
“For sure,” Ami cracked another beer and handed me one. Itook it since I’d pumped enough for Casten the last few days and I figured Icould have one free night.
We could hear the boys in the distance all yellingobscenities at each other; Jameson’s laughter, Spencer’s laughter and thenfinally Justin and Tommy squealing like little girls quickly followed byJameson and Spencer screaming.
Once I started drinking that night, I couldn’t tell youwith accuracy what actually happened but it was one of those nights I didn’tcare. It was nice to just be a kid again.
Any time once of us thought we’d woken up the kids, westart giggling like a bunch of girls at a slumber party and saying ‘shhhh’ onrepeat.
Around four, we were still going strong when we heardmovement near the tents. Jameson practically jumped onto my lap.
“Do you think it’s a cougar?” he asked pulling hisbaseball cap down to hide his panicked expression from the others.
“No,” I pushed him off. “And if it was I’d feed you tohim.”
He laughed remembering those words from our honeymoon.Everyone else looked at us curiously. Apparently, to Jameson and me, it was thefunniest thing we’d ever said to each other and we both laughed uncontrollably.It was probably the alcohol.
All our laughing woke up Jimi.
Emerging with a grunt from his tent, Jimi looked aroundthe campsite and shook his head with a smirk. His hand rose to scratch the topof his head. “I don’t even want to know how this happened.”
Tommy, who’d passed out by the fire, groaned and sat up.After looking around for a moment, he laid back down and asked. “Is the roomstill spinning?”
Jimi kicked a few bottles out of the way and made his wayback to his tent muttering something about his grandkids being more mature thantheir parents.
Ryder stood, brushing aside the crumbs of the two bags ofchips he’d eaten and walked over to Tommy and looked closer at his face.
He stared at him for a moment before turning to all of us.“His eyebrows are gone!”
“No shit?” Justin perked up. “They just grew back fromthe incident at Dog Hollow.”
“Yep.” Ryder looked closer. “They’re gone.”
“Fuck yeah.” Jameson pumped his fists in there air. “Hedeserves that.”
Ami felt the need to remind Jameson that Tommy was theone who was peed on tonight.
“That’s not really the point.” Jameson said reaching foranother beer and a bag of barbeque chips.
“Not the point my ass. She made a perfectly goodpoint.” I reminded him only to have Jameson glare.
