Page 99 of Unbearable
When Raven returns, Tony makes his way over to the table. “How’s the Hemming family doing tonight?”
Mom smiles. “We’re good.”
Scooting her chair in, Raven points over her shoulder at a drawing on the wall near the restrooms. I can’t make it out clearly, but it looks like three people holding hands and a woman in the clouds. Then beside the little girl is what appears to be a baby. “Is that from Nova?”
Tony smiles at the picture he tells us Nova drew last week. “Lenny and her came in the other day. I just adore Lenny. Such a nice girl for Red, but yeah, Nova apparently asked Nevaeh to send her a baby.”
Everywhere you look in the restaurant are reminders that Nevaeh held a special place in everyone’s lives and though she’s gone and Red’s now with Lenny, nothing will ever completely stop the pain inside of Red, Nova, and Tony. It wasn’t easy seeing Red lose Nevaeh. I tried so hard to help him through it but there wasn’t much I could do to help him.
Lenny, she helps him in ways no one else could, gives him hope at a future, like Raven does with me.
Raven laughs at the drawing and the baby. “I wonder how Red feels about it?”
Tony grins. “Knowing Red, he’s probably okay with that.” Tony glances at me and shows me a bottle of wine. “You look like you need a drink.”
I’d love one…but then my truck flashes in my head and the tarp covering it.
“Nah.” I lean back in the chair, shaking Tony’s hand. “I’m good.” It’s rude to pass up the wine, but I’m not giving in. I might not ever drink again after the accident.
Raven stares at the bottle, then me. “You can still have a drink or two.”
With my arm around her chair, I shake my head. “I don’t need one.”
“You’re not drinking anymore?” Dad asks, watching Tony pour him a glass of wine.
“No.” I didn’t tell my parents I had been drinking that night. I actually assumed they knew. It wasn’t that I was trying to keep it from them.
I look at Raven, and then my parents. “I had been drinking the night of the accident. I think it’s best I don’t anymore.”
My dad, being a man of very few words most of the time, stirs uneasily in his chair. “Did you get a DWI?”
“No. I was under the legal limit and it didn’t cause the accident.” Raven’s hand finds mine under the table. Awkwardly, I clear my throat. “It was the seizure that caused me to crash.”
I’m sure they were aware of what happened since they’d been at the hospital, but I felt the need for them to hear it from me.
“Tyler,” Dad begins and I take in another deep breath trying to relax. “We all make mistakes. Don’t beat yourself up over it.”
The double meaning doesn’t go unnoticed by anyone. I remember when I was eight years old, I threw a stick at a girl and it hit her eye. I didn’t mean to but for a month she had to wear an eye patch and sleep sitting up because of the damage to her eye. I felt like a complete asshole and my mom sat me down and said: Remember that the greatest lessons in life are usually learned at the worst times from the worst mistakes.
At eight, I had no clue what she was talking about but thinking about it now I finally understand the meaning of what she was trying to tell me.
Yeah, I made a huge mistake driving drunk and not taking my medicine but it didn’t mean I had to stop.
WE TAKE OUR time with dinner and talk with Tony for hours. The sky is black, stars out and glimmering above as Raven and I walk up the street to the car. She’s staring straight ahead, her focus contained to the pavement. I choose then to finally speak. “Can I hold your hand?”
She watches me warily. “That feels like dating.”
“But you let me hold your boobs the other night when we were watching the movie.” I’m desperate to hold her close and let her know how much I appreciated her being there for me tonight.
“Oh hell, why not.” Her sense of humor surfaces and she smiles. “But don’t you dare kiss me on the cheek or open the door for me.”
“Got it.” I chuckle. “No acting like a gentleman.”
It takes me a moment, but I slide my hand out of my pocket and reach for hers. A warm smile tugs at the corner of her lips. I wonder then if she likes the feel of my hand in hers as much as I do.
I can’t help it. I want her closer so I pull on her hand, then wrap my arm around her shoulders.
“You’re pushing it, Ty.”
