Page 53 of Unbearable
Be still my heart.
The look on his face captivates me as it always does. Instantly, he has my full attention, my heart pounding oddly fast.
He sinks his teeth into his bottom lip and then lets it go. With a grin, his fingers brush the edge of my bra strap, teasingly, lightly tickling over my collarbone.
He brushes my hair behind my ear as his eyes roam over my face lit by the My Little Pony nightlight with splashes of pink and purple. “I’ve told you, I do have feelings for you.”
I touch his purple-lit cheek. “Just not girlfriend feelings.”
“Well—” His head twists and he kisses my palm. Something in the way he looks at me unnerves me, makes my skin tingle and my breath hitch. “—I don’t have girlfriend feelings for anyone else either.”
I tip my head. “There’s that.”
He didn’t try to have sex with me either.
There’s that, too.
Maybe he’s wanting a change of subject, I’m not sure but he smiles and motions around the pink and purple sheets hanging up by a baseball bat stuck between couch cushions. “You know, the last time I was in a fort was when I was eight years old.”
I laugh lightly, covering my mouth so we don’t wake Nova. “Were you with a girl?”
He nods a bit arrogantly. “Two actually.”
“Not surprised.”
“It was the neighbor girl’s. They were twins and we were playing doctor.”
“Oh my God, you were a flirt even back then, weren’t you?”
Tyler chuckles softly, rolling on his back, his arms resting on his stomach. “Probably. Got my first kiss that day.”
“I bet you did.”
Turning his head, he looks at me with curiosity. “Who gave you your first kiss?”
“Devin West.”
He groans, his arm flopping over his face. “That little fucker? He slashed my tires senior year.”
“Yeah, because you and Red gave him shit every time you saw him.”
“We weren’t that bad.”
“Bullshit.” And then as my mind shifts through the memories, I realize Tyler is in every one of them, always in the background, or right beside me. “You know, every memory I have of my childhood you’re in it.” I have so many of him, mostly protecting me. Aside from the time he gave me my first beer when I was fifteen and then proceeded to hold my hair while I puked for the next hour.
“I have a lot with you in them too.”
“Remember that time we went camping at Sun Lakes and you carried me for two miles on your back because Rawley pushed me down a hill and I broke my ankle?”
“Yeah.” He gives a slow shake of his head. “Man, I waspissedat him. He could have really hurt you.”
“Something tells me that was the intention. I mean, it was a pretty steep hill.”
This is why I enjoy being around Tyler so much. We can talk about anything. As I remember that day, and the hot sun on my back as Tyler carried me, I can still recall the way his muscles felt, tensing and straining, and the smell of the sunscreen he wore.
“This might sound weird, but did you ever think you’d be fucking me someday?”
He laughs, the corners of his eyes crinkling with the motion. “No.”
