Page 109 of The King Contract
He’s right.This is the exact dilemma I’m in, wondering how to proceed without breaking my heart or Noah’s or ruining something that was the perfect summer fling.
“I’ve been burned before, and I’ve been taking my angst out on the two of you,” he continues. “I like you, Millie. I don’t want you getting hurt. It’s not worth it.”
There’s an unmistakable pain in Dan’s eyes. Instinctively, I reach out and touch his forearm, assuring him I understand the things he’s not saying.
“Thanks, Dan. You’re a good friend.”
He nods as the door opens and Mack’s voice booms across the room to welcome people to my event.
Dan smiles at me. “You ready?”
I do my best to push aside thoughts of fake-dating and hard conversations and roll my shoulders back. “As I’ll ever be.”
44
NOAH
I don’t brawl
This iswrong on every level.
In two seconds, the past three months play out like a movie in front of me, and I recoil, lifting my hands away from Sofia. “I don’t want to kiss you.”
Sofia jumps up. “I’m sorry!”
“You don’t need to apologise,” I assure her, standing to my feet. “It’s not you. It’s just, I only want to kiss Millie.”
The admission is liberating, like being battered beneath the waves and breaking through the surface, inhaling a heavenly gulp of oxygen. I’ve finally admitted to the world I want my fake girlfriend to be my real one. And it doesn’t terrify me. If anything, it injects new life into my veins.
“I know, I know!” Sofia says, panicked. “I can’t believe I did that.”
“Sofia, breathe,” I assure her.
She covers her face with her hands, peeking at me through her fingers. “Could I stoop any lower, or what?”
I roll my eyes. “I would beat you on every front on stooping low. Trust me.”
She gives a sheepish smile, and as if she remembers where she is, pushes her hair back off her shoulders. “I know it’s not an excuse, but the truth is . . . I’m lonely.” She scoops up her champagne flute. “I don’t mind being alone, but loneliness? It’s crippling. God, I need therapy, don’t I?”
I chortle, shoving my hands in my pockets. “Nothing wrong with therapy. Especially if it can help you overcome some of this stuff you’re going through. Mack’s setting me up with a sports psychologist for this year.”
“That’s great,” she says, and I know she means it. She rolls her shoulders back. “Can we forget this happened?”
“Forget what happened?”
She grins. “Thanks, Noah.”
Sofia’s not vindictive or malicious. Some of the things I loved about her were her kindness and vulnerability, and the way she tries to see the good in everybody. We had a wonderful relationship, even with its low points, and that we can both stand here and have this conversation (and awkward moment) is a testament to that. But standing here in proximity, with good memories and the feel of her lips on mine? The only thing I can think of is Millie.
Her cute smile and her wild, dark hair always falling in her eyes. Her awkwardness when she held my hand for the first time, or the look of pride on her face when she stood up on a surfboard. The way her shoulders drop, and her face relaxes when she’s behind a camera. The way she opens up when it’s just the two of us and how she looks at me like I’m more than a contract or an old school acquaintance.
My feelings for Sofia are purely platonic and though she might miss my companionship and the familiarity of what we had, she’s not in love with me anymore, and I’m not in love with her.
I’m in love with someone else.
Whoa.I’ve spent a few months stressing over my feelings and emotions, but now I’ve accepted them, excitement and anticipation have replaced the fear. Complete clarity washes over me, and everything until this point has led me to realise how much Millie means to me.
“We’re not about to witness a brawl, are we?”
