Even this beautiful girl beside me wasn’t human. She was something called a nightmare; another type of supernatural that were eradicated for their generous powers. She and her parents were the last of their kind. The djinn hunted her all lastsemester, and I’d had no idea of the danger that surrounded her every moment.
Her bond, Kai, and his cousin, Ezra, did a good job of protecting her and shielding me from what was going on.
Until they couldn’t.
One minute, I was a friendly, bubbly girl living her best college life, and now I was… this. I wasn’t normal anymore, and part of me blamed her. I side-eyed the sulking brunette beside me and stepped away when her arm kept brushing mine.
I didn't care that it forced me to walk on the rough edge of the path. I didn’t do well with touch.
“It’s getting worse,” she whispered when she caught me looking. “The sleepwalking.”
“Yup.” She frowned at my short answer, but what did she want me to say? It was her damn fault.
That wasn’t exactly fair. She tried to keep her distance when we met, for reasons I now understood. It was me who attached toherside like a burly bush from my family’s farm. I tended to do that. Collect people.
The dorm rose in front of us, and I wanted to end this before we got there, so I offered her a small truth.
“It usually happens when I’m having the nightmare.”
I didn’t have to elaborate on whatthenightmare was. I’d never told her, but she had a pretty good idea all on her own. They all did. They were the ones to find me, after all.
“Another one? That’s the fourth this week.”
I waited for her to badge us in and didn’t say thank you as I pushed inside and ducked into the stairwell. My anger grew again at her words. I couldn’t control when I had a fucking nightmare. I’d had the same one every night for two weeks, ever sincetheordeal. That’s what I called it, in my head, at least. It sounded too stupid out loud. There wasn’t a word strong enoughto encompass all that happened to me. For what still happened in my waterlogged mind.
We made it to our floor, and I once again had to wait until she opened the door. Catatonically walking in the middle of the night meant I hadn’t taken my keys. I elbowed my way past her again, and a half-packed dorm room met my exhausted gaze. Taped boxes sat stacked on my desk and the chair. I knew even more were tucked out of sight beneath the bed, filled to the brim with all my material treasures that seemed completely useless now.
Trauma had a way of changing your perspective on life. What was the purpose of twelve different shampoo scents—what was theneed—when two strong men could drag you out of the building, onto a boat, and sink you so deep into the sea you still caught whiffs of salt when your hair fell over your shoulder?
I double-checked that my messy bun held and took a relieved breath.
“Rani,” she started, and my shoulders tensed. “That’s a lot of midnight adventures, don’t you think?”
I wasn’t sure if she saw what happened to me on the beach or if she arrived at the end, but the thought of anyone witnessing my absolute inability to function was enough to break the fragile shield I’d created.
“No one said you had to stay here,” I snapped, and roughly opened my closet door, effectively turning my back and hiding. I was too much of a coward to see the pain my harsh words caused, but I couldn’t escape hearing it.
“T-that’s not what I meant.” Her voice was soft as it carried in the small room.
I even detected a small tone of pleading woven in. It was something I wouldn’t have noticedbefore—the minuscule variations in pitch and inflection when people spoke. It wasdistracting at the best of times, and these were definitely not good times.
How could they be when my recently learned knowledge that the supernatural world existed nearly got me killed? Actually, no. Fuck that. Itdidget me killed, but I didn’t want to think about why that was no longer true. My only thoughts were on what I had to do to get out of here.
“I’m worried about you, Rani,” Eryn pushed, with a thread of desperation. “I’ve tried to give you time, space, but—”
“I didn’t ask for any of that,” I hissed, keeping my back to her.
I distracted myself by gathering my shower supplies, but who was I kidding? I didn’t want to face the pain caused when my barbs landed. It was the truth, though, and I couldn’t stop my misery from spilling out in the shape of poisoned-tipped arrows.
“I didn’t ask for you to stay here instead of the safe, comfortable apartment you share with your boyfriend. I didn’t ask for the smothering shadows you guys have turned into or the never-ending looks of pity you throw my way when you think I’m not looking.”
My shower caddie was filled with more than I planned to use, but my hands shook too much to keep them still. That persistent rage I couldn’t shake literally vibrated in the very center of me. It took everything I had to keep it inside—to suppress its noxious smoke that leaked from my eyes, my nose, my ears. Bits of it escaped despite how hard I pulled on its leash.
“I distinctly rememberonlyasking for you and Kai to help me with my make-up tests so I could finish this semester and go the fuck home.”
With a thick, fluffy towel clutched in my fist, I stomped to the door, but froze with it open only a crack. I blew out a breath and forced as much anger out with it as I could. My forehead hit the wood with athunk,and my shoulders dropped. Those tiny shifts in tone? I felt them even in the unspoken words. Which meantEryn’s sharp inhale told me all I needed to know about how deeply my words had truly struck.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, still not looking at her. “I’m just tired.”
