Page 49 of Jordan
She fiddled with her utensils restlessly, before looking over at the woman who was married to her son. Jordan had said somethings to her the last time he was at the manor, things she had taken to heart. And made her think.
"You don't know how to love and is the worse off for it. What I will not tolerate is you treating my wife with disrespect. If you want to be part of our lives, things are going to have to change. Or I swear to God that you'll lose me."
"I have cancer." It was delivered in a precise and abrupt manner that lessened the impact and had Julesa staring at her in shock.
"I'm sorry. What?"
"Stage four." She continued slowly, twirling the fork around the crisp vegetables. "My appetite is not what it used to be, and I am planning on calling a family meeting to make the announcement, possibly tonight at the dinner table." She lifted her eyes to Julesa. "You're the first to know."
"Why?" Damn the woman for making her feel like crap. For putting this on her. "If you're thinking of giving me the responsibility of telling your son, then you're in for a disappointment. I am not doing that."
"No." Jacquline shook her head. "It's not that. It's--" She took in a deep breath. "I want a fresh start." She shrugged slender shoulders. "I've been doing a lot of thinking. And I have a lot of regrets. I was brought up by very strict parents, you see. Beingthe only child, there was a lot riding on me. I went to a Catholic school where the slightest infraction was severely punished. My life was charted for me without my input. I had no say in anything. I never knew better, and I grew my children in the exact same way."
Her expression turned wistful. "I don't know how to love. Jordan said that to me just before he left, and he was right. I never loved my husband and giving him children was something that was required of me as his wife. It was just duty. And I'm ashamed of all of it now." Lifting her chin, she stared at Julesa. "I am here asking you to forgive me."
The shock was reverberating inside her body and seemed to go on. She had come here thinking the woman would try and pay her off and had come prepared for battle. Never in a million years, had she expected anything like this.
"I don't know what to say."
Jacquline nodded, understanding that forgiveness was not something easily given, especially after years of hurt and resentment. Silence enveloped them, heavy and thick like a woolen blanket, as both women absorbed the gravity of the moment.
Jacquline's eyes softened, revealing a vulnerability that was seldom seen. "I never meant to cause you pain, Julesa. I was blinded by my pride and rigid upbringing, but now, facing mymortality, I see things differently. I want to make amends, not just for myself, but for Jordan too. He deserves a mother who can show love and compassion, even if it's late in coming."
Julesa's heart pounded in her chest, torn between lingering anger and the unexpected sincerity in Jacquline's voice. She knew that holding onto bitterness would only continue to poison her soul but letting go wasn't a simple matter either.
"I need time," Julesa finally said, her voice steady yet strained. "Forgiveness isn't something that happens overnight, especially not with the history we have. But I appreciate your honesty and your willingness to change. It's a start."
Jacquline's face brightened ever so slightly, as if a small ray of hope had pierced through the darkness. "Thank you, Julesa. That's all I ask for—just a chance to start anew."
With a tentative smile, Jacquline reached out, her hand trembling slightly. Julesa hesitated, then slowly extended her own hand to meet it. In that moment, a quiet understanding passed between them, an acknowledgment of the past and a tentative step towards healing.
The air was still charged with the weight of unspoken words, but for the first time, there was a glimmer of possibility—an opportunity for two women, bound by family and fate, to forge a new path forward.
*****
The need to write was upon her. Whenever there was a conflict, something bigger than she can grapple with, Julesa would disappear into her own made-up world. It had been the case when she was little, and her parents used to fight. Whenever her dad came up stumbling drunk and started an argument with her mother and stepbrother, she would disappear, making up stories of princesses and fortified castles with the handsome knights riding to the rescue.
She would like to think that was what made her a damn good writer. Her traumatic past had molded her, and she had to be grateful for that.
The conversation with Jacquline had touched her. The woman she had hated and feared since she was a child was human after all and not the giant she thought of her as while she was growing up. She was human and very sick. After the revelation, Julesa had searched for signs and noticed the pallor of her complexion and the sadness lurking in her eyes.
So, she had called Jordan to let him know she was headed for the cabin. It was more convenient and besides, men were working on her aunt's place, finishing the restructuring and turning one of the downstairs rooms into an office for her. As ordered by Jordan. The man was determined to make her stumble headlong in love with him.
Pursing her lips, she folded her legs beneath her and gazed at the stunning landscape. The place was isolated and had a breathtaking beauty that simply hurts the eyes.
She was not afraid of the solitude. Henry, the caretaker had dropped by with supplies for her because Jordan had contacted him and the man had cruised around the cabin last night and this morning to make certain she was okay.
She had shown her gratitude by making him breakfast.
Now she was alone, sitting on a chaise lounge she had Henry drag outside for her. She had instructed him to prop it against the thick root of the redwood tree facing the meandering path that was surrounded by trees so thick, one could barely see the way ahead. Flowers grew in wild abundance at the base of the trees. The trickle and murmur of the lake vied with the birds singing as they go about doing their business.
She had written several pages, her mind simply flying with the information she wanted to put down. Her characters pursed and pulsed with life and dramas.
That was how Jordan saw her. He had his driver leave him at the beginning of the road and decided to walk the rest of the way. After all, he had stopped at the house to check on the progress and left his case there. With just a carry on and his briefcase, he stood just next to the flowering rhododendron and watched her staring off into space. Her hair was piled into an untidy bun ontop of her head with tendrils escaping. The blouse had slipped down one shoulder, and her long sexy legs were laid bare from the very minute shorts she was wearing.
A smile curved his lips, and he felt his pulse jumping. He had been anticipating this moment ever since he left. When she called him to say that she was going to be at the cabin, he thought it was perfect. He wanted to be completely alone with her. For what he had in mind, this would do very well. A second honeymoon or a first. He was going to keep her in bed for two whole days.
He ached for her. Shaking his head at how swiftly things had progressed between them, he also could not help but feel a little shimmer of uncertainty and fear. He loved her – what he felt for her was so consuming, it takes his breath away.
