I should let this go.
But instead, I reach for the door handle with trembling fingers, stepping out into the cold night air.
The wind is sharp against my skin as I make my way down the familiar path, the sand cool beneath my bare feet when I slip off my shoes.
The ocean stretches out before me, vast and endless, the moonlight dancing on its surface like liquid silver.
I sink onto the rocks near the shore, pulling my knees to my chest, and stare at the waves, letting the sound fill the silence in my head.
This is the place that always made me feel calm, but tonight?
Tonight, it only makes me feel empty.
I think about my future.
What I want. Where I see myself in five years. Ten.
And all I see is him.
Jaxon, with his steady hands and easy smile. Jaxon, rolling his eyes at me when I steal his fries but never actually stopping me. Jaxon, who held me even when I tried to push him away, who always came back—until I made it impossible for him to.
I let out a ragged breath, the weight of everything crashing down on me all at once.
I don’t want to live in this cycle anymore.
I don’t want to keep running.
For the first time in a long time, I want to fight.
My hands tremble as I pull my phone from my pocket. I hesitate for only a second before I press call.
The line rings.
Once.
Twice.
Then, a soft, familiar voice filters through the speaker.
The scent of fresh linen and lavender fills the office, familiar and steady, like nothing has changed since the last time I sat in this chair. There’s the same soft lighting, the same cozy throw blanket draped over the couch, the same small water bottles on the end table next to the tissue box.
Everything is the same.
Except me.
I’m different.
I don’t know if I’m better or worse, but I know I’m not the same girl who used to sit here, arms crossed, defenses high, refusing to let anyone dig too deep.
Dr. Martha, my therapist, watches me with patient eyes, her gaze steady, waiting.
She doesn’t rush me. She never does.
But she also won’t let me run.
Not this time.
I pick at a loose thread on the sleeve of my hoodie, swallowing down the lump in my throat.
